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Alan Keyes Thinks The Feds Plan To Wage War Against Homophobes — Literally

Alan Keyes has long held a place of honor in the tinfoil-hat brigade of the religious right.

A perennial (and perennially losing) political candidate, Keyes split with the Republican party because it was insufficiently conservative for his tastes and took up such loony causes as challenging President Obama’s citizenship and the ever-useful attacks on homosexuality as “selfish hedonism.” (Unlike the altruistic hedonism of heterosexuals).

Keyes’ latest, though, ranks right up in there in the annals of conspiratorial lunacy. In his column, Keyes speculates that the federal government is preparing to launch a military attack against churches that oppose LGBT rights.

“[I]t’s not at all unreasonable to see, in certain recurring reports, signs that the U.S. government is preparing our military forces to do violence against Christian denominations that refuse to abandon God’s Word on matters like homosexuality,” Keyes writes. “Just the other day, I read that soldiers in the U.S. military have been told in a training briefing that evangelical Christians are the No. 1 extremist threat to America….Catholicism and ultra-orthodox Judaism are also on the list of religious extremist organizations.”

Of course, these reports originate in other parts of the padded-cell echo chamber.

Perhaps Keyes is worried that his daughter will stand astride the lead tank as it rolls down the church aisle. Maya Keyes came out as a lesbian when she was 19, at which point her parents threw her out of the house. Clearly, charity doesn’t begin at home in the Keyes’ household.

Photos: Wikipedia

By:           John Gallagher
On:           May 1, 2013
Tagged: , , , ,

  • 5 Comments
    • Dakotahgeo
      Dakotahgeo

      We only seek to destroy hemorrhoids on society, and you were chosen as #1… step right up, Sir… and bend over. This won’t hurt one… BIT!!!

      May 1, 2013 at 3:56 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Cam
      Cam

      Oh Boo Hoo, he might not be allowed to attack and victimize others?!?!?! how HORRIBLE for him!

      So I’m assuming that he would also have been screaming at Lyndon Johnson for signing the civil rights act because it was “Attacking” those poor rac-ists? Or yelling about how allowing women to vote was declaring war on all those men who didn’t want women to have any rights?

      This guy is just a boring old blowhard bigot.

      May 1, 2013 at 4:19 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Polaro
      Polaro

      Can we shoot him first? Mainly for being too stupid to live. Seriously stupid, stupid man.

      May 1, 2013 at 4:22 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • MK Ultra
      MK Ultra

      Hey, these right wing lunatics started “the culture wars” (their term, not ours). Now they have the sadz because they are miserably losing the “war” they started? AAAAHAHAHAAAAHA!
      History is written by the victors and the homophobes should know that the history we write about them will be a fate worse than imprisonment DDD

      May 1, 2013 at 4:41 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • 2eo
      2eo

      christianity IS the NUMBER ONE threat to the western world, they kill vastly more people than islamists do in our nations.

      May 1, 2013 at 5:23 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

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