homework assignments

American Troops In Afghanistan Will Have To Learn About The Gays Before Returning Home

I just knew the repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell was going to impact troop readiness! But noooo, nobody would listen to dear old me. See, rather than have our men and women in Afghanistan dedicate their time and resources to hunting for the hidden immunity idol, they are going to be subjected to “sensitivity training” while stationed abroad, so they can learn the proper hand shakes and eye contact code of conduct when dealing with homosexual soldiers. The training will take place on bases, rather than when the troops return home to the U.S. — because, like, that could be in forever. Army Command Sgt. Maj. Marvin Hill, who’s heading things up in Afghanistan, tells reporters, “Our goal is to not allow a unit to return to home station and have the unit responsible for that. While we own those soldiers, sailors, airmen and Marines, we’re going to execute that training on the ground. We hope that it will have little impact on their combat and security operations here.” Fat chance, AMIRIGHT?!

Don't forget to share:

Help make sure LGBTQ+ stories are being told...

We can't rely on mainstream media to tell our stories. That's why we don't lock Queerty articles behind a paywall. Will you support our mission with a contribution today?

Cancel anytime · Proudly LGBTQ+ owned and operated