We were just paying a visit to our super crush Kenneth Hill's website, The Gayest Editor Ever and came across a somewhat disconcerting post entitled, "50 Gayest Things of All Time". At first we thought Hill had compiled a list of his favorite things. Boy were we wrong. The list comes from a website called The Phat Phree.
Alongside the list of "gay things", the chaps have included the so-called "The 50 Things That Make You Feel Like A Man". So, what makes them feel like men? Well, in addition to what you see above (thanks for the image, Mr. Hill), they include "Driving driving drunk to work, hurting someone by accident, killing an animal and getting a blowjob." Manly things, right? So, what's gay? Aside from what you see above, "Loving your father, safe sex, wearing a scarf, eye contact and handjobs".
Rest assured, however, the boys don't mean to offend. They offer a preemptive explanation:
Before anyone gets their rectum puckered, nobody around here hates homosexuals. We love gay people- well not love, but we don't dislike them any more than we dislike everyone else.
…
Besides, homosexuality is not at all what this list is about. Whether you smoke pole or munch rug, we all know that some things are just plain gay. If there were a better word, we'd use it. We are writers after all.
Oh, yes, Pulitzer quality, even.
While were not necessarily offended, we do think they could have found another word. Although, if we are forced to adopt their terminology, yes, handjobs are "gay". Seriously, who really gives a handjob?
(Note: may we suggest next time the kids want to compile such a list, they choose a less provocative word? Perhaps it can be called "Things That Are Douchey"? Then they can include themselves.)
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That is like an Onion parody of a "50 things…" list. Bunk beds? Color blind?
I don't have a problem with the label "gay things," but I think the "make you feel like a man" label is problematic — that sort of gender stereotyping feels like a relic from the 1950s. (For example, I suspect that women who play shirts & skins feel pretty womanly about it, what with their exposed bosoms clattering around. And carving a turkey — or food service of any kind — is easily within the realm of housewifery.)
The title is simply inaccurate — it suggests that power, control, and confidence diminish one's femininity. I know many femmy lads and ladies who would would disagree with that premise.
A better title might be "Fifty Things That Make You Feel Like a Top."
This reminds me of the commercial for Snickers during the Super Bowl last night…two guys munching down on opposite ends of the same dark, chocolatey candy-bar all the way up until their lips meet. To undo the 'accidental kiss' these men are left with no other recourse than to do something 'manly' like ripping out their own chest hairs! So very, very tired!
Erg, whatever people want to say about the list is fine, but please can the editors stop being so homonormative. Its why the young gays don't call ourselves gays, we are queer. So we have queer sex. Not boring gay anal fucking, but good queer sex. Hand jobs included, and guess what, sometimes that IS the finish. Please, only the straights have to climax by sticking it in a hole.
Is it wrong that I felt a tingling in my genitals reading the not gay list?
Shirts and skins
Pullups
The smell of a locker room
Pissing out a fire
Hard hats
Sounds hot!
Queerty, you guys need to cut the bitching on this one. Find something more worth it. I'm gay as the day is long, but the list is a cynical jab at stereotypes….what some people call humor. Get a grip on this one and put your writing to better worth, I say. Unless, of course, that offends you.
_Joshua
Shirts and skins are totally gay. Just skins? Even gayer. Straight men may have invented taking off one's shirt in public, but gay men made it sexy.
Maybe that belows on the gay list: "Turning things that are gross when straight men do them into things that are hot."
Also, I know plenty of gay men who know how to tie more than three knots.
Do you know a single gay man who would be caught dead in a bunk bed? Not me.
What is gayer than making a list of things that are gay?