Next time you have a shitty date, take some minor comfort in the fact that as soon as you get home you can “X” off another square on your Bad Date Bingo card. Get five in a row you win… a wasted month, sympathy from your friends, or a pity cocktail. Congratubortions!
Image via Jezebel
Jimmy Fury
What’s wrong with shiny black shoes?
Gorbeh
I don’t dance or drink, so is this why I’m single?
Red Meat
Mark Zuckerberg is not just a bad kisser, he looks like he would be completely dull in bed. I would let him rape my anus for 1% of his fortune however. Please don’t judge me.
Riker
@Red Meat: I would for 0.1%.
Mahhhhttt
Oh come on, I can’t help being a picky eater. I’ve tried to expand but the textures drive me insane. Also…I’m a little shy on the first date, regardless of what happens đ
HAL
@Red Meat & @Riker: Are we talking net worth here? Or actual money in his bank account, because that’s a big difference.
Jeffree
A woman I worked with once set me up on a blind date with a very handsome, smart & funny guy.
Problem was that he is straight — not even a tiny bit bi. Apparently, his mom questioned his orientation because he wasn’t dating women & so she rigged the whole arrangement to see if my gaydar pinged.
We did have a bunch of laughs & good food (he paid, too!). He’s now dating a lovely woman who shares his interests in beekeeping & global warming. (That whole bee thing would’ve been a deĂ lbreaker for me even if he was gay…)
Gorbeh
I like bees!
Jeffree
@Gorbeh: lol, well I’m sure you’re a great person otherwise! The beekeeper guy I went out with is an “environmental scientist” & *did* school me on how /why bees are important in the environment, so it wasn’t a total waste of a date….