Of course The Globe's "gay scandal" cover story on Barack Obama has to include a shirtless photo of him on the beach — how else to communicate that "gay scandal" means "sex scandal"? The whole charade of a story is ridiculous, but given our penchant for mixing gay witch hunts and politics, let's see what the accusation is.
We refuse to shell out even a few dollars for The Globe, so we can't tell you all of the item's accusations — perhaps you have a copy? — but here's the article's blurb:
PRESIDENT Barack Obama is caught up in a new gay sex and drug scandal – and his loving wife is heartbroken, sources tell GLOBE in a blockbuster world exclusive. Find out all the details of the letter Michelle Obama received from the MAN who claims to be her husband's lover – and how America's devastated First Lady is fighting back against a shocking new tell-all book. It's must reading!
Let us translate:
• "a new gay sex and drug scandal" = A made up scandal we pulled from a hat, which was scribbled on a piece of paper alongside "another woman" and "secret S&M fetish"
• "the letter Michelle Obama received" = We punched out a few lines on an old Brother typewriter, addressed it to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, and reprinted what we wrote
• "the MAN who claims to be her husband's lover" = A pseudonym for a staff editor assigned to manufacture this ridiculous scenario
• "a shocking new tell-all book" = There is no book. Not even a book deal. Or a manuscript. Just a catchy title for an invisible book and this article
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I intentionally get in the longest line at the market so I can read the Enquirer, Globe and the National Examiner. The Globe I saw this week had "Bush suicidal" as the lead story. If only…..
Likely this is just that crackhead Larry Sinclair yapping again.
must reading? I wonder if the whitehouse commented on this hahah.
I'm shutting off the insightful, coherent commentary for a moment. Okay?
I wish I could be President Barack Hussein Obama's gay scandal. Still the second sexiest president ever.
I'm done now. Carry on.
What a silly publication the Globe is although I know I will get a call from my grandma this week with a shocked "Did you here Obama was gay???"
Dave
Who really actually reads these rags, it is yellow journalism at its worst, creating something from nothing just to sell papers, boy their bottom line must really be rolling in RED ink for them to come off with some as ridiculously absurd & asinine as this piece of claptrap. How many times do they have to be taken to court by famous persons before they realize, you can't go around just making things up about someone just because they are in the public eye, no matter how good it looks on paper and reagrdless of how interesting it may sound in the morning staff meeting. Grow up you fools, try publishing, oh say REAL news.
These rgs are just that…rags for simple minded people who are bored in their own pathetic lives.
Larry Sinclair sent Michele a letter and then told the Globe he did it. He's been beating that story about obama picking him at a bar and scoring & doing blow for years. He's also been proved to be utterly nuts.
Yeah, and I think last week's Enquirer had a story about George and Condi breaking Laura's heart.
These hacks are mindbogglingly stupid.
Love how the globe picks the shirtless Hawaiian vacay pic. That's how you can tell if a man's gay, you know. He galavants shirtless on a beach.
Oh and to answer the question: Yes. Yes, McCain is dying.
i don't believe this for a second. that said:
for over a year, the national enquirer was the only "news" source that investigated the rumors about john edwards and his affair. no other outlet would bother to even look in to it. that is, until the enquirer undeniably proved that john edwards, a major candidate for president, was having an affair with a former staff member, had fathered a child out of wedlock, and did it all while his amazing wife was struggling AGAIN with cancer. then, of course, EVERY news outlet said they were aware of the story but that they couldn't confirm or deny the story earlier. funny how our "real" news media works.
so, while i don't really believe this, i also know that there's a crazy small chance that it could absolutely be true.
or he could just be an alien.
Well, Roger, said to have to say it this way, but the Globe is hardly the National Enquirer.
Obama has admitted to past cocaine use and since he appears to a human being with feelings I am sure it made him freaky too. I would not be surprised if he has a freak streak in him but so what. He is cute.
I have no doubt those are his kids and he and Michele do love each other. I prefer him to that obvious pic-a-ninny cow praising Gov. Jindal any day.
That story of Obama picking up a gay Extraterrestrial Elvis Clone at a bar and scoring & doing blow is totally and completely true. Recently their illegitimate alien hybrid offspring hatched out of a watermelon.
@Henry Holland – I totally saw that Bush Suicidal cover too. I was tempted to buy it just for the fun of it, but couldn't bring myself to do it.
These tabloid rags have broken many absurd-sounding stories that turned out to be true. Remember John Edwards and his mistress? What about Gary Hart and his affair? And countless others. The Rense website has a lot of info about Obama. Obama is very intelligent and a great speaker, but then, so is Madoff.
@cruiser: "How many times do they have to be taken to court by famous persons before they realize, you can't go around just making things up about someone just because they are in the public eye…"
They can keep it up indefinitely as long as they make more selling the magazines than they lose in the lawsuits.
It's not as bad as it seems, though: how many of their readers actually *believe* what they write, and how many buy it because they enjoy seeing what nonsense they'll come up with next?
My favorite was Weekly World News – about 15 years ago there was a photo of a woman on and ice floe – the headline read "woman found alive on ice floe from Titanic shipwreck." Like she could live on ice alone for 70 years? I applaud the imagination of the writers for the most part though. How to think up such nonsense week after week.
Oh, another one – page 47 "I was a whore in outer space" followed up on page 48 with "my favorite Bible verse!"
If they wanted to put something much more believable out there they would look into the possibility that Obama is the "Real" Manchurian Candidate. It looks very posssible that he, Polosi and Reid are brainwashed Soviet plants that activated 20 years too late. Karl Marx and Lenin would be very proud of the new American leadership.
I wonder what it is like to work at The Globe. I should put in my resume.
Speaking of Barack Obama:
Barack Obama is a racial-minority individual, and in his heart and mind he inevitably does not endorse hate crimes committed by George W. Bush.
George W. Bush committed hate crimes of epic proportions and with the stench of terrorism (indicated in my blog).
George W. Bush did in fact commit innumerable hate crimes.
And I do solemnly swear by Almighty God that George W. Bush committed other hate crimes of epic proportions and with the stench of terrorism which I am not at liberty to mention.
Many people know what Bush did.
And many people will know what Bush did—even to the end of the world.
Bush was absolute evil.
Bush is now like a fugitive from justice.
Bush is a psychological prisoner.
Bush has a lot to worry about.
Bush can technically be prosecuted for hate crimes at any time.
In any case, Bush will go down in history in infamy.
Submitted by Andrew Yu-Jen Wang
B.S., Summa Cum Laude, 1996
Messiah College, Grantham, PA
Lower Merion High School, Ardmore, PA, 1993
“GEORGE W. BUSH IS THE WORST PRESIDENT IN U.S. HISTORY” BLOG OF ANDREW YU-JEN WANG
______________________
I am not sure where I had read it before, but anyway, it is a linguistically excellent statement, and it goes kind of like this: “If only it were possible to ban invention that bottled up memories so they never got stale and faded.” Oh wait—off the top of my head—I think the quotation came from my Lower Merion High School yearbook.