Good news! (Well, for most of us.) Barney Frank is coming back. After taking a year off after his retirement from Congress, Frank has signed on as a talking head for CNBC. It’s the perfect venue for Frank’s razor-sharp wit, which has been sadly missing from the current political scene. Here are 11 of Barney’s most memorable quotes to remind us of what we’ve been missing out on in his absence.
On the difference between race and sexual orientation: “Race has been much more devastating, but there’s one psychological factor [that’s different]: Very few black kids have ever had to worry about telling their parents that they were black.”
On fears that heterosexuals have of showering with gay men: “Do you think the spray makes it catching?”
On Rep. Dick Armey calling him “Barney Fag”: “I rule out that it was an innocent mispronunciation. I turned to my own expert, my mother, who reports that in 59 years of marriage, no one ever introduced her as Elsie Fag.”
On supporting the “radical gay agenda”: “I do not think that any self-respecting radical in history would have considered advocating people’s rights to get married, join the army, and earn a living as a terribly inspiring revolutionary platform.”
On Log Cabin Republicans: “I’ll be honest: For 20 years now I’ve heard how the Log Cabins are going to make Republicans better, but they’ve only gotten worse. I now understand why they call themselves Log Cabin: their role model is Uncle Tom.”
On being a minority: “I’m used to being in the minority. I’m a left-handed gay Jew. I’ve never felt, automatically, a member of any majority.”
On discussing issues with a woman who said Frank was following Obama’s “Nazi policy”: “Ma’am, trying to have a conversation with you would be like trying to argue with a dining room table. I have no interest in doing it.”
On a potential bumper sticker for Democrats: “We’re not perfect, but they’re nuts.”
On the war in Iraq: “The problem with the war in Iraq is not so much the intelligence as the stupidity.”
On President George W. Bush: “People might cite George Bush as proof that you can be totally impervious to the effects of Harvard and Yale education.”
On conservative values: “Conservatives believe that, from the standpoint of the federal government, life begins at conception and ends at birth”
On his ability to make reporters cry: “Does the First Amendment say something about how you can never say anything nasty to a reporter?”
We can hardly wait to see how Barney adds to the list through his new gig.