Can Glee’s Creator Really Keep Chris Colfer From Taking Tricks to His Trailer?

Anyone who’s ever worked in high school theater knows about the dangerous and often tragic cocktail of teenage drama and hormones. Even the unsexiest plays (like Thorton Wilder’s Our Town) have at least one-fourth of the cast knockin’ boots. Which explains why Ryan Murphy, the gay creator and producer of Glee had to enforce a “no sex in the trailers” rule for his young cast. He says it’s “to maintain discipline” and “keep romances between the young actors spiralling out of control.” He’s right, but he’s also insane if he thinks young actors — armed with fame and cash and invincibility — will let rules keep them from bumpin’ ugz.

“I’ve certainly dated people I’ve worked with and, you know, when you work on a set for 18 hours a day I think it’s natural,” Murphy says. “But I have a rule: don’t do it in your trailer. They’ve broken that rule on many occasions. I’m like, ‘I know you guys are young and hormonal, but don’t do it in your trailer’. I’m the dad, that’s what I say.’”

Working in a theater cast is kinda like serving time in prison — even if you despise your fellow inmates, you gradually find yourself becoming attracted to them purely because you’re forced to look at their dumb faces for hours on end. It doesn’t help that every single member of Glee is totally doable. In fact, co-stars Kevin McHale and Jenna Ushkowitz (who play wheelchair-bound Artie Abrams and Tina Cohen-Chang on the show) have already been snapped at a London nightspot and a Monaco beach together. Rehearsing?

Also, don’t buy into the idea that theater was ever about high-culture; it’s always been mega-sexual and dirty. In ancient Greece, festivals coincided with drunken orgies, or so we’re told. Even back in Billy Shakespeare’s day, his plays were the cultural equivalent of WWE Smackdown. He competed against dog fights and bear baiting. Groundlings didn’t come to Billy’s plays for the iambic pentameter, they came for the pig bladders filled with blood and the hot man-on-boy action.

Murphy’s right, though: Letting Romeo kiss Juliet backstage always ends in tragedy. It’s better to save all that pent up sexual aggression for the stage, and let youthful star get frisky offstage where you can safely blame their parents. And their agents.