The only thing scarier than the National Organization for Marriage’s (NOM) presidential pledge is the fact that four actual human presidential candidates have signed the damn thing.
And we bet you can guess who.
Ted Cruz, Ben Carson and Bobby Jindal have joined Rick “Messy Bottom” Santorum in signing the appalling document, which promises to take a page from the Putin playbook regarding same-sex marriage if any of the clowns make it into the oval office, god forbid.
Related: Not To Gloat, But NOM Has Collapsed Into Irreparable Debt And OK We’re Gloating
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
First, theres NOM’s big fish to fry — reversing the Supreme Court’s June marriage equality decision and amending the constitution to ban same-sex marriage once and for all. Because freedom?
But it isn’t enough to just ban gay couples from getting married. The pledge also seeks to do something about that pesky “shifting social landscape” by clamping down on, of all things, free speech. These four actual candidates (we reiterate because it defies all logic) have promised that if elected, they will “prevent the promotion of a redefined version of marriage in public schools and other government entities.”
So a children’s book that teaches kids it’s OK to have two mommies? Out of the question, burn it.
Related: Texas Librarian Rescues LGBT Children’s Books From Mob Of Homophobic Parents
As a final farce, the pledge promises to, “direct the Department of Justice to investigate, document and publicize cases of Americans who have been harassed or threatened for exercising key civil rights to organize, to speak, to donate or to vote for marriage and to propose new protections, if needed.”
Yikes.
Grant Mealey
Not holding my breath….hope they do tho ð???
Bill Mountrey
Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dumber = 2 unaccomplished morons.
Brian JC Kneeland
They will not succeed. It would take a constitutional amendment – which is extremely difficult to get passed on the federal level and harder to get 38 states to ratify! Good luck idiots!
William Meyer
This is a non-issue. These freaks will never win the White House.
Tom Remillard
I’d ban them out of the country
Xzamilio
Oh, Teddy is looking for some Jindal Johnson!! I know that look, gurl!!!
Esteban1971
How many times do we have to keep pointing out the same thing?
If they want to fight the dissolution of American marriages, they need to look at the catastrophic divorce rates among heterosexuals. Attacking gays marrying is like worrying about a hangnail while ignoring the blood gushing from a missing limb.
Rush Limbaugh is on his fourth wife, but still damns gays for wanting to succeed where he continues to fail.
Matthew Katz
get a room already!
Cory M. Warren
They need to stop having steaming gay orgys with put in and the ayatollah. Republican politicians are so predictable. They don’t just have herpes, they have derpes.
GG
Asshats.
NateOcean
Their lips say, “no, no” but their eyes say, “yes, yes”.
Ladbrook
Obviously, if they reverse Obergefell and ban “propaganda” in schools, then these four asswipes will feel less tempted to act on their true natures, because as we all know, Christians are all about eliminating those tasty temptations.
So for those who were curious, there’s your official list of non-practicing, self-hating, closet cases currently running for Prez on the Republican ticket.
I guess Lindsey chose not to sign it because he’s not actually “non-practicing” (thanks to his friendship with the uber-Top, John McCain).
Xzamilio
These conservatives are dangerous people… we joke, but they are seriously dangerous and would send this country careening back into the Dark Ages if they could. I would honestly rather have Trump in office than any of them. I’m personally going for Bernie, as Hillary Clinton is a little too center left for my liking. Plus, the bitch lies a little too freely.
BlueDude
And what a group of nitwits we have there! D*ckheads all. To be such a brilliant surgeon, Carson is an idiot otherwise. I can’t wait til the GOP clown circus is over!
Jim Cash
What a cute couple. But there’s no “top” in the union. They have each other’s head up their asses.
Luis H. Lopez
Antigay bigots and lunatics!
Max Adgate
They look gay for each other.
Creig Stearne
The world moves forward as America takes another step backwards. Brilliant job boys.
mbfmark
The probably truth is that they all know its a lost cause, just like their presidential aspirations. HOWEVER, it further endears them to their delusional right wing base who will pay money for speaking engagements and books and other schemes they dream up in the future. I would guess if you could look into the heart of these losers, their only “sincerely held belief” is how rich they can get by manipulating the prejudices and fears of the bible thumpers they are pandering to. Reality is meaningless to them, they will lie and twist the truth as needed to keep the bucks coming in. Any evidence needed, just listen to Raphael Cruz’s lying diatribe about the evils of Planned Parenthood (all the state investigations have turned up nothing illegal whatsoever done by the organizaiton) who he describes as engaging in highly illegal activities.
robho3
I don’t think we need to worry about any of those crazies getting the nomination.
Michael Finnegan
“Anchor Babies”, this needs to be a new show on Adult Swim.
PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
The thought of those two doing it made me throw up in my mouth…………
These lunatic right wing nutbag zealots are like the lone Japanese soldiers that hid out in the jungles for decades refusing to acknowledge they had their arses handed to them in defeat…………….
John Andrew K. Carver
Where are they getting their advise? From Vladimir Putin? This ain’t Russia guys.
Curty
Bunch of nutjobs who want to bring the country backwards. They have no chance to become elected. NOM still exist? Hahahahaha. They lost, we won.
Leonard Woodrow
My knowledge of American politics is zero, but please tell me these idiots have no chance of being elected.
Tony Chaplinski
ahhh the look of love
GayEGO
Noxious Obtuse Morons are going down the hopper with a big flushhhhhhh!
Giancarlo85
Where is that obnoxious Alistair Wiseass to defend these two republiturds? This is what the republiturd party stands for. Regression, economic disintegration and social conservatism. Vote for them if you don’t give a fuck about anything or your future. If you like being a slave, vote republican.
Giancarlo85
@Giancarlo85: *I meant several republiturds. Too many turds to count lol.
Josh447
When they quit crying in their underwear about the fact they are seriously gay, they’ll drop out of sight and we’ll never hear from them again.
Bad Ass Biker
@Brian JC Kneeland: The fact is that even those these idiots are supposed to be educated, they have no idea how government or the Constitution works.
billeetee
And why should we all be surprised?
Avery Alvarez
It’s highly unlikely that any of these men will get close to the presidency.
Sweet Jeebus, I, and everybody else on this board have a better chance of being elected president than these @sshats.
1EqualityUSA
Maybe they are modeling for the place on Mt. Rushmore? Though they would take the word, “Mount” out of it, as it elicits carnal images…
Jimmy McKinney
Ah go ahead and kiss. You know you want him
scotshot
@Giancarlo85: Alistair is probably out somewhere campaigning to officially change the definitions of both secular and hate crime. But remember: A bad penny always turns up.
Michael A. Hann
Douche bags
MarionPaige
As usual the peanut gallery misses the point.
THE POINT BEING that these men are trying to aggregate a mob to get themselves elected to something.
Men trying to aggregate a mob are convinced that being anti-gay and anti-gay marriage will help them in some way. THAT’s the point, that men trying to get elected to something are convinced that there is enough anti-gay hatred in America to AGAIN put a Republican in the White House.
AS USUAL, the threats and potential risks to gay people keep escalating and White Queens remain convinced that that won’t affect them.
1EqualityUSA
MarionPaige, Paramedics would call you a pants-shitter. These men will aggregate nothing, they will win nothing. They scare zippies, such as you. That’s it. Drink some warm milk and curl up in bed with your covers over your head.
Misty Bolling
What’s done is done. You can’t undo it now
youarekiddingme
@1EqualityUSA: LMAO!!! Your comment: : “pants-shitter”…that’s a new one! Can I use it some time? Please? I almost fell off my chair!!
Oh, where is that dickhead Alistair Whathisnuts? He needs to chime in on his republican scum-sucking, sewer babies and defend them (and their demented views) to the bitter end. Did he have to take his meds early tonight and go back to the group home?
Giancarlo85
@MarionPaige: Um, are you sure you’re not the only peanut gallery on here? I’m not a “white queen”. Let me make something real clear to you… you are always full of the same inane bullshit. The anti-gay social conservative will beat their chests and drum up support from their base. That does sound concerning… until you start to notice their base is mostly old white men that are dying off.
In 2012, republicans won the white male vote by the same percentage Ronald Reagan did in 1984. Ronald Reagan won in a landslide, Republicans lost by a sizable percentage. Do the fucking math please. The angry white male idiots don’t sway anything anymore. It’s 2015… not the 1980s.
youarekiddingme
@MarionPaige: “AS USUAL the threats and potential risks to gay people keep escalating and White Queens remain convinced that that won’t affect them”.
You are obviously delusional. The “White Queens” who remain convinced that that (threats and potential risks) won’t affect them…are the very people that are the most VOCAL on this entire forum you mushroom!
Do you not read any of these posts/forums? Are you brain dead?
Are you that fucktard Alistair? He likes to make these broad, unfounded generalizations as well! You must at least be related!
FnameLname
@Esteban1971: thank you
Zenguy
They love to conflate education and understanding with promotion. They seem to think society acceptance of homosexuals/marriage influences children’s sexual orientation, as if that was an option! They are either pandering to their religious base,or they are just plain stupid. It’s likely a little of both.
Transiteer
The Republicans aren’t really a political party. They haven’t really been one since Eisenhower. This most recent edition, shows that they have morphed into a sad and sickly comedy show for masochists. Spewing hate, undemocratic rants, and finger pointing at “groups” to garner support from the hillbilly dumbass trailer crowd.
Do the right thing and vote this Party out of existence. Insure Republicans become extinct in ’16.
Louis
Ironic these are the ones who call US insane and mental yet their actions consistently prove that those 2 words define them not us.
Douglas Schlitz
Almost looks like they have a “thing” for each other, YUK !
I guess morons are attracted to each other.
martinbakman
The two MOST despicable Repubs! Tie breaker goes to Cruz though, for his creepy looks.
youarekiddingme
@Transiteer: The party WILL continue because you have guys like Alistair voting for them just because they are republican!
Sean Brennan
Because following Russia’s example is such an American thing to do they can campaign on that ideal.
JohnBligh
Speaking as a foreigner (a Brit living in Greece) I cannot comprehend that people like this have any credence in what purports to be the world’s leading nation. Thank God that the USA has enough true Christians and others who understand that love should be the prime motivation in life and that encompasses tolerance. What sort of warped environment throws up people like these and those that follow them? Hatred has to play a part of their motivation and yet they cannot see how non-Christian that is.
MarionPaige
@Transiteer: “The Republicans aren’t really a political party.”
New York City politics is the template for The Republican Party and it seemingly has been for some time.
What you had / have in New York City historically is so many different ethnic groups that no one demographic could claim a majority in order to elect anyone to office (in general). So, then,
The question then became “how does one aggregate a mob big enough to get one’s self elected when you had this population with so many diverse interests”? The answer was / is you find something that the most people all hated.
Every “issue” the Republican Party attaches itself to is about aggregating an angry mob, about getting people who aren’t registered Republicans to cross party lines out of hate for something. This makes it unforgivable (in my opinion) that White Queen happily allowed the Republican Party to use Gay Marriage as an aggregator.
1EqualityUSA
and look what it got them.
youarekiddingme
@MarionPaige: Your use of a logical fallicy nullifies your entire argument. When you use a word like “every” it shows you have not done research and shown proof in your statements.
Your grammar and punctuation make it difficult to understand your thought process as well. How you can start a sentence in one paragraph and continue it at the beginning of another is beyond me… Quoting you: “…So, then,
The question…”
Your improper use of commas (not using when you should and using when they’re not needed), improper capitalization, using quotes when none are needed (you are writing your own thoughts) and not finishing a complete thought within one paragraph are all very confusing issues in your writing style (or lack thereof). Overuse of bold face type doesn’t help your point either. Perhaps proofreading your comments before posting them will avoid confusion (look what happened to your post last night).
I have to admit ignorance on your use of “White Queen”. The only reference I could find on a search was a TV Mini Series. A search for “White Queen Republican Party” revealed nothing. Please enlighten mean as to your reference (specifically) when you use the phrase: “White Queen”.
1EqualityUSA
Giancarlo85, Here’s an article you can sink your teeth into:
http://www.nytimes.com/2015/08/28/opinion/paul-krugman-rash-test-dummies-as-republican-candidates-for-president.html?ribbon-ad-idx=3&src=me&module=Ribbon&version=context®ion=Header&action=click&contentCollection=Most%20Emailed&pgtype=article
youarekiddingme
@1EqualityUSA: The republicans are so worried about the queers that they have their heads in their asses on the other important issues. A point that Wiseass seems to lose in his speeches about how wonderful his party is. You notice how these jerks “jump in and out” of these forums when faced with facts? Same thing happened with this last guy. Hopefully never to be heard from again…
Excellent article by the way.
Jerry Mitchell
Its a Bromance
1EqualityUSA
The haters do tend to disappear when they are thoroughly refuted with logic, I agree.
reyesrutherford
Don’t these idiots know that being a President means that that will uphold and protect the US Constitution and follow its laws? If they cant do this, they ave no business running for Presidency!
Giancarlo85
@1EqualityUSA: I liked one part of that article…
“Even the supposedly sensible candidates call for destructive policies.”
Then the article talks about John Kasich (who has done a shitty job as Governor much like Bobby Jindal and has sinking approval ratings).
@youarekiddingme: Wiseass disappeared under the other article when a bunch of facts were posted. He just couldn’t handle it.
voodoopup
Well it seems we have a new NAZI party, or at least same mind set. God help us all.