Though they've yet to confirm, everyone seems dead set that Madonna and Guy Ritchie are calling it quits. While Ritchie will likely fade into oblivion following a potential divorce, rumor has it that Madonna's already found a new playmate: married Yankee Alex Rodriguez.

That is, of course, if you believe tab-rag Us Weekly:

A source tells Us that the $28-million-a-year Rodriguez, 32, has made numerous solo nighttime visits to Madonna, 49, at her spacious home and would sneak out "as late as midnight." Says the source, "All the doormen are talking."

Rodriguez attended Madonna's April 30 NYC concert; the singer sat in his seats at a Yankees game on June 22 (it was the first time she ever was photographed at a Yankees game). Her son Rocco, 7, also sported Yankees gear on June 25 while playing in Central Park.

Oh dear God! Does Madonna have no shame?! She's letting her child wear Yankees gear in New York?! This woman is sick. Someone call child services.

Paula Abdul's come under heavy fire in recent days.

As we all know, the American Idol host kind of screwed up last week when she misspoke and said she had heard both of Jason Castro's songs when, in fact, he had only performed one.

Well, Colin Schoenberger of NewNowNext recently spoke with the entertainer and got to the bottom of how the snafu went down. We would go into the details, but it's complicated and, quite frankly, not as interesting as this:

…People talk about Madonna being the queen of reinvention - and while I applaud her - I don't know anyone who's reinvented themselves more than me, and created monumental, ginormous success in completely different areas of the industry. And that's something nobody's done – not in our generation and not that anyone I've been reading up since I was a little girl. I don't know anyone who started below the line and became - first of all, a cheerleader, and then revolutionizing cheerleading - and then became one of the most world-celebrated choreographers.

Abdul later discusses Idol castoff Danny Noriega, who she says she "fought" for because "this kid is needed – especially Danny- because he is very open about being gay."

Like old Madonna, Pete Wentz owes at least part of his career to the gays.

The bent boys are always fawning over this over-hyped singer, who once showed his penis to the world and confessed that he would - gasp! - kiss a boy. Not one to ignore his biggest fans, Wentz gave the gays some more love last night at his bar, Angels & Kings.

New York magazine's very excited Chris Rovzar "reports." - or, we're assuming it's Rovzar:

Naturally, we accosted him. "I heard it's gay night, right?" he asked us, after we complimented his pointy hair. Turns out Pete has "great 'dar," by which he means he has a highly tuned interior electromagnetic sensor which lets him know when there are moving or fixed homosexuals nearby.

So, naturally we asked, Do you like running with gays, Pete? "It seems sometimes like nobody knows how to have a good time anymore," he told us. "But the gays are always having a good time." It's true! We are! We didn't get our name for being grouchy, now did we?

That's why we Queertians are always raining on parades - fighting stereotypes one grimace at a time.

Madonna's never been a shrinking violet.

And she definitely made no exception while chatting with MTV's equally ancient John Norris, who asked her about her age after her recent Roseland Ballroom performance here in New York City.

She may have gotten snippy during their exchange, but Norris got the last laugh.

Read and watch his bitchery-laden retelling, after the jump…

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Now that Madonna's reaching her 437th year, it's time for the universe to find a new ultimate diva.

And Russian popstar Valeriya is gunning for the top spot. In fact, she's already being referred to as the "Russian Madonna," which means she must have a big gay following, right? Right. But she's making sure to cover all her bases:

I don’t like the term gay icon, I just want to be an icon! I wouldn’t mind if they like me, why not. I think that the gay people are very creative, they feel everything very well and have good taste. I hope that my music can help people, especially those that have had to deal with difficult things in their life.

Well, we have a killer blister on our foot and this track - "The Party's Over" - definitely made it feel better. Thanks, Valeriya! You're a miracle worker!

We didn't get a chance to see Madonna's show last night at the Roseland, but our pal Matt Bell did - and he offers a mixed review, after the jump…

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Queen Madonna got her performance on last night at New York's Roseland Ballroom.

Her show, a fan-directed "thank you" promoting her new album, Hard Candy, also featured a special "4 Minutes" appearance by Justin Timberlake, who also cuddled with the singer backstage.

Madge's one lucky bitch…

While you're busy figuring out whether Madonna has truly been a fan to the gays, why not be among the first to listen to seven new tracks from Hard Candy? They're all below.

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Some homos take their Madonna very seriously.

A "former" reader wrote in to kvetch about our this morning's Madge-related remarks, which were actually pretty neutral. Oh, except for calling her new single "shitty," which it is…

Anyway, the aforementioned reader wrote in to yell at us and at least some of you:

I just read your little post about Madonna, and I have to say I find it very rude. Not to mention all the rude comments your readers have left. Kind of makes me wonder what kind of website you are running here. Is this a bitch fest, where you and your readers can put down people who support the gay community?

Madonna has done nothing but support the gay community her entire career, even when it was taboo to do so! I don't think its too much to ask to show her the respect she deserves. You want to hate on those who don't support gays, and those who do, then who do you got left? Not me, thats for sure.

You spoke too soon, mister.

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