Talk about a queen!

Unemployed entertainer Rosie O'Donnell paid Martha Stewart a visit today and took the opportunity to remind the world that she's in need of a job.

Joshing with Stewart, O'Donnell asked for a gig on the domestic diva's talk show. When Stewart said O'Donnell's too expensive, Rosie not only pulled the "I visited you in the clink" card, she offered to work for "The View rates". Martha sort of laughed it off and tried to move on with their segment, but tenacious Rosie simply wouldn't quit.

Apparently O'Donnell still isn't over getting squeezed out of her old gig.

Poor girl.

Former boy bander Lance Bass appeared on The View this morning to discuss his new book, Out of Sync. Watch as the gals pick Bass' gay mind on Justin Timberlake, coming out and his mother's reaction ("Are you going to heaven?"). Whoopi Goldberg reassures him, "I think God's okay with you, baby". She's so sweet

Also, Elisabeth obviously doesn't read the news, because she asks Bass if he and Britney Spears are still friends. Poor, poor Elisabeth's dreams are totally crushed.

[Thank Petulant Rumblings for the video!]

Every once in awhile an ostensibly "straight" man lets out a little bit of fag.

You can't tell by this snap, but CNN's Anderson Cooper's reacting to Whoopi Goldberg's enticement, "We will be right back with fall footwear for under 50 bucks."

Cooper's totally forgotten that our planet's in peril - the reason for which he appeared on the show. He's definitely thinking, "Shoes!"

Not convinced? Head to Gawker to watch the video. It'll take your breath away.

Meanwhile, we're not sure if George Clooney's playing princess in this picture, but he's looking a bit light…

Rosie O'Donnell took another shot at former colleague Barbara Walters Wednesday night:

…Rosie O'Donnell mounted the stage at Roseanne Barr 's invitation during her late-night set at Comix on W. 14th.

Rosie started off by saying, "When I was fired by Barbara Walters" - the first time she didn't stick to "The View's" spin that her departure from the show was by mutual agreement.
…
Rosie also confided that she and the veteran newswoman were actually so close early on in her tenure as moderator that Walters recommended Rosie use Astroglide.

Excuse us while we burn out our eyes and cut off our testicles, which we'll never use again.

O'Donnell wasn't totally insulting. The lesbian comedienne admits that Walters set the stage for female journalist, "…She paved the way for women. She interviewed Presidents…" Barr piped up: "Like Abraham Lincoln."

Bitchery at its finest, ladies and germs.

Things got inappropriately - and nauseatingly - steamy on today's episode of The View. Not only did Barbara Walters tell Faith Hill she wants to "do" hubby Tim McGraw, but Whoopi Goldberg seems to have solicited Speaker Nancy Pelosi for a menage:

Even before Pelosi walked on stage to take her seat at the round table, the show's moderator, Whoopi Goldberg, and its co-hosts - with former news anchor Barbara Walters leading the pack - started flirting with the speaker's husband, Paul…
…
[Later] Barbara turned to Guest Pelosi and said she has heard Whoopi say before that she'd "do Paul Newman."

"And I think she'd like to do your husband as well," Walters deadpanned…

Yes, Whoopi implicitly acknowledged, she'd like to do Mr. Pelosi - but she might take his wife while she's at it. "I would do her as well. But we should wait on that because you're still in office, I don't want to cause a problem."

Mrs. Pelosi just smiled politely.

The View producers seem to have made the right move when they hired Whoopi Goldberg. Variety reported earlier this week that ratings are higher than ever for the daily talk show. While Goldberg, Barbara Walters and the girl are no doubt thrilled, a fan of former co-host Rosie O'Donnell's seeing red.

In a post on her nonsensical blog, a Rosie reader questions ABC's Nielsen numbers:

While im all about creative use of ratings, I think we need to do something with the lovely people at the view insisting that the ratings are up without rosie when in fact they are not…

Rosie goes on to cite numbers showing ratings are down 9 percent among a core demographic, women between the ages of 18 and 35. ABC, however, stands by their numbers and say total viewers are up about 400,000 compared to the same time during Rosie's reign.

• Wait, is the world flat?

• Larry Craig cruises back into Senate.

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No doubt Barbara Walters is thrilled about her new radio gig. Former colleague Rosie O'Donnell, however, thinks Walters needs to call it quits.

NY Post reports that in her already over-hyped book, Celebrity Detox, O'Donnell calls Walters' 77-years into question:

At some point, a person gets tired. It's inevitable. Barbara Walters is almost twice my age…at some point it becomes necessary to step back. Everyone has to go. Going is part of the gig.

O'Donnell apparently really wanted Walters to know what she thought: the 45-year old entertainer sent the legendary journo a copy. Always political, Walters said she'd read the book and wanted to focus on O'Donnell's "love".

Funny, it doesn't sound like she has any…

Just when you thought it was safe to go to the bookstore… Page Six reports that Rosie O'Donnell's new book rehashes her old feud with real estate tycoon Donald Trump. The former View co-host apparently spills some ink to take on Trump's Miss USA, Tara Connor, who was caught drinking underage and tested positive for cocaine.

It is Trump's falseness that angers me more than anything …I spoke my mind. People found it funny.

I honestly did not anticipate the malice of his response…I assumed Donald believed he had money. I did not assume Donald believed he was money. But apparently he does…The stuffing of his self spilled out - think of a torn scarecrow, only instead of hay, it's crisp $100 bills blowing through the cornfields.

O'Donnell also allegedly describes Trump as a "slug".

An ABC rep, meanwhile, had some harsh words for O'Donnell and her fragile state of mind: "This is the work of a deeply disturbed woman, page after page of insane ramblings. Ultimately, it's sad and pathetic."

Don't worry, Trump's just as pathetic: his new book also addresses the feud. These kids just don't know when the let up!

Elisabeth Hasselbeck had some surprisingly logical things to say regarding gay marriage on this morning's The View.

A conservative through-and-through, the perky chatter-box may have made a few enemies among her Republican comrades - especially the married folk.

(Thanks for the link, Good As You. Our first born totally has your name on it.)

There's no doubt Perez Hilton's left an indelible - and, at times, irritating - mark on popular culture. In addition to his staggeringly successful blog, the shit-stirrer recently landed a VH1 reality show, appeared on The View and received a "surprise" visit from Victoria Beckham. So, how does Hilton, born Mario Armando Lavandeira, Jr, stay humble? He doesn't.

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• We're totally in love with the animal behavior student who made this video.

• Anti-gay crackdown in Italy?

Italian police detained two gay men for kissing outside the Colosseum and accused them of "lewd conduct", sparking howls of protest on Friday from rights groups and calls for an apology from a government minister.

Coppers, meanwhile, claims the arrests have nothing to do with homophobia.

• Nicole Richie has a date with the warden.

• Happy Outiversary, Lance Bass!

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If we didn't know better, we'd swear Rosie O'Donnell has absolutely no life whatsoever. The former View co-host recently used her "family cruise" as a platform to blast her former colleague and sworn nemesis, Elisabeth Hasselbeck.

The increasingly deranged O'Donnell drew a devilish picture of Hasselbeck and then laughed off the bubbly chatter box's resume, saying, "Her only fucking credit was Survivor. Come on!".

That's not very family friendly, Rosie.

The View co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck's finally broken her silence on her public (and ugly) falling out with former colleague, Rosie O'Donnell.

Hasselbeck sits down with Access Hollywood this evening to discuss the ins and outs of the women's dead friendship:

You know, truthfully, I think a friend is someone who you have positive communications with, so I don't know if I would define us as friends right now.

Hasselbeck isn't ruling out the possibility that she and the lesbian entertainer won't rekindle their "challenging" relationship. She did, however, express concern about Rosie's recent blog comment, "I never tried harder to be friends with someone…I don’t think we ended up there".

Scatching her pretty little head, Hasselbeck tells Access, "She sent me two emails right after that and I sent her one back. It was a really great email, so hearing these things after really surprises me."

The former Survivor contender then looked up and squealed, "Oh my god! Did you know that sky thing's blue?? Crazy!"

ABC's loss may be NBC's gain. Fox reports that NBC executive Ben Silverman's jonesing for some Rosie O'Donnell action:

New programming chief Ben Silverman is telling friends he will do anything to get O'Donnell onto the network, and not just in daytime. Silverman is talking to O'Donnell about hosting a prime-time game show he has up his sleeve as well as a daytime hour a la The View.

A full hour of Rosie? Haven't they tried that before?

Meanwhile, in other Rosie news, the box loving chatter box has joined forces with online gaming site Pogo to help raise money for her Rosie's For All Kids Foundation.

Participants are asked complete a set of game goals. For each successful target reached, Pogo will donate some dough - up to $15,000! So, head on over to Pogo and play a little. But hurry! The team-up terminates on Saturday.

Read Rosie's "poetic" press statement, after the jump.

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