After previously failing to convince the gays that his company didn’t hate them, Chick-fil-A’s president and COO Dan Cathy is back with a new statement, clearly unhappy this little scandal — where a supposedly independent restaurant location opted to donate free food to a pro-discrimination conference — isn’t over. Alas, this time there’s no video, just text, so allow us to give you clearly conflicting parts.
Item: “In recent weeks, we have been accused of being anti-gay. We have no agenda against anyone.”
Item: “Chick-fil-A has a long history of trying to encourage and strengthen marriages and families, both within our Chick-fil-A system and with our customers.”
Item: “Chick-fil-A’s Corporate Purpose is ‘To glorify God by being a faithful steward of all that is entrusted to us, and to have a positive influence on all who come in contact with Chick-fil-A.'”
Item: “[W]e will not champion any political agendas on marriage and family. This decision has been made, and we understand the importance of it. At the same time, we will continue to offer resources to strengthen marriages and families. To do anything different would be inconsistent with our purpose and belief in Biblical principles.”
Now, if you’re playing along at home, grab your magic decoder ring and your invisible ink pen, and start connecting the dots: Chick-fil-A’s corporate mission is to encourage the strength of marriages, but it is not anti-gay, even when it donates free goods to organizations that promote marriages in an anti-gay way. Cathy wants to have his delicious chikin and eat it too. Sorry, bub. Doesn’t work that way.