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SMALL BUT MIGHTY

Child Star-Turned-Sexy Go-Go Boy Blake McIver Demands Respect For All Pocket Gays

Screen shot 2014-07-21 at 9.19.00 AMBlake McIver’s resume just keeps on growing. From child star, to go-go dancer, to pop vocalist, to his latest career move: essayist/pocket gay activist.

The former Full House star has penned an article for the Huffington Post titled “The Trails and Travails of Life as a Pocket Gay.” In it, he ruminates on the struggles he’s faced as a result of his short stature. From the adjectives people use to describe him:

I truly do not understand that just because of something as simple and inconsequential as height, I’m suddenly described in an entirely different set of terms than men all of two inches above me. I hear cute, adorable, precious, and sweet. Why can’t I be handsome, attractive, rugged or heck, even pretty?

To the dangers of being in a crowded gay bar:

A person of average height walks in, surveys the territory, checks out the crowd and elbows his way to the bar to get a drink. BAM! I am now splayed out on the floor because that elbow lined up with my face and now I must pick myself up off the sticky bar floor. The only silver lining here is that I didn’t have far to fall.

But perhaps the worst offense of all, Blake writes, is being physically transported against his will. He calls it the “Pocket Gay Pickup.” He recounts an incident at Here Lounge in West Hollywood in 2012:

I was standing near the bar with a friend, enjoying a cocktail and having a gay ol’ time when suddenly I was hoisted in the air, moved six feet away from the bar, then dropped and discarded like a rotting banana peel. I’m telling you people, it happens. ‘Sir, just because I am small does not mean you have the right to pick me up and move me. Have you ever heard the phrase Excuse me?’

Ultimately, Blake, who doesn’t reveal his height in the essay, says what he wants is respect:

Drunk straight girls and drunk, tall homos, respect your pocket gays. We are people too. And in the event of an emergency we can dodge our way through a crowd to get to the exit before you even knew the building was on fire. Trust me, you’re going to want us on your side.

So there you have it, folks. Be kind to those travel-sized pocket gays. Fight the urge to pick them up or pinch their cheeks. Remember that they are people, too. Oh, and don’t forget to Blake’s new album.

By:           Graham Gremore
On:           Jul 22, 2014
Tagged: ,
  • 21 Comments
    • JJ24
      JJ24

      I’ll admit I like taller men but considering i’m 6’6 finding ones taller is hard, but that doesn’t mean I don’t love “pocket gays”. Hell one of my longest relationships was with someone who was/is considered a “pocket gay”.

      Oh and blake isn’t cute, he is sexy!

      Jul 22, 2014 at 2:31 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • AJAnders
      AJAnders

      This must be a slow gay news week.

      I admit the guy is hot. But does the fact that he guest starred on a couple episodes of Full House 20 years ago really justify a news feature on this site about him?

      Jul 22, 2014 at 2:38 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • barkomatic
      barkomatic

      Being picked up and placed in another location by a stranger is definitely rude. Sounds like a guy trying to display how strong he is.

      That being said, I do love the pocket gays. Unfortunately, its just hard to see them as rugged or sexy no matter how scruffy they get. Pocket gays can definitely be pretty and handsome but I’ll always think of the younger ones as cute as well.

      I’m 43 years old and couldn’t possibly be a “twink”. There’s no point in pining after that identity so I must play up the Daddy thing to please my market. :)

      Jul 22, 2014 at 2:41 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Cam
      Cam

      TWO articles on this guy?

      Jul 22, 2014 at 2:51 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • stormboy_sa
      stormboy_sa

      I’m above average size and love shorter guys! They are sexy as fuck!

      Jul 22, 2014 at 3:27 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Cam
      Cam

      @stormboy_sa:
      AMEN!

      Jul 22, 2014 at 3:57 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • tdh1980
      tdh1980

      I’m 5’5″ and have never been referred to as a “pocket gay.” In fact, most of the time my diminutive stature doesn’t even come up in conversation because most guys think I’m taller than I indeed am. I guess it’s the way I carry myself.

      Jul 22, 2014 at 4:03 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Cam
      Cam

      @tdh1980:

      And it’s also probably that you aren’t trying to falsely create an issue so you can have an excuse to write an article.

      Jul 22, 2014 at 4:48 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • ethan_hines
      ethan_hines

      He makes up for his small stature in a more important area!

      Jul 22, 2014 at 5:54 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • tricky ricky
      tricky ricky

      well la de da. like midget/pocket straight guys don’t have the same problems

      Jul 22, 2014 at 6:40 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • vive
      vive

      Really, there is no reason a short gay guy should ever feel bad about his stature. I’m tall but I much prefer short guys and I think a lot of guys are. There is a number of things I can do with a short guy in bed that are impossible with a tall guy. With a short guy, more body parts are in reach simultaneously. :)

      Jul 22, 2014 at 6:41 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • tricky ricky
      tricky ricky

      @ethan_hines: in all probability it just looks bigger on him when in actuality it is just regular.

      Jul 22, 2014 at 6:41 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Teeth
      Teeth

      @stormboy_sa: I’ve been married to a “Spinner” for 20 years. And being picked up and moved against your will is Battery. Someone once tried that with my guy— he was a tweeked out muscle guy. I beat the holy snot out of him, right there at the Eagle. He is now clean and sober, and we laugh about it when we run int each other.

      Jul 22, 2014 at 6:42 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • tdh1980
      tdh1980

      @vive: Call me. ;-)

      Jul 22, 2014 at 7:05 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • NoCagada
      NoCagada

      I just think it’s so cute when you little shorties get all mad and hold you’re breath and turn blue…you’re just soooooo adorably and boyishly cute!

      GET OVER IT! I had a BF who was 6’6″ and people said some of the most ridiculous things. Sometimes, people just want to talk to you and they just don’t know what to say. He never let it bother him because, as he said:

      “In a few years, you’ll be wondering where all those stupid people who said stupid things to you are…”

      He ended up dying rather young but he never wasted time on something so trivial.

      Jul 23, 2014 at 12:07 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Mikey_ATL
      Mikey_ATL

      @barkomatic: I turn 40 in a few months. I remember just 8 years ago when the early thirties were HOT. Now, I tell guys that I am 39 and all of the sudden, “OH….you’re getting old!” Why is 40 old? Why do I have to keep aging? Guess I should comment on this article, “Eh-Hem..” This guy is cute. OOPS! this guy is sexy and pretty. I happen to like shorter guys. In fact, I’m VERY attracted to them. So, if he was to say hello, I’d probably put him in my pocket.

      Jul 23, 2014 at 3:09 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Scribe38
      Scribe38

      I have a friend who is under 5’5″ and we basically have to protect him at the bar. People grab on him constantly and try to physically dominate him. I have actually heard him say “no” or “let me go” and people just ignore him. I always joke about getting him a stun gun for Christmas.

      P.S. He’s a top and people who he wants to top don’t take him serious, while tops chase after him all night.

      Jul 23, 2014 at 4:22 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • abuelo
      abuelo

      I thought his article was kind of tongue in cheek and written as someone able to laugh at his own situation. I adopted my two youngest sons from Peru and they are 5’3″ and 5’2″. Both guys are fine with their height and Nobody ever tries to physically dominate them. Both guys work out and carry themselves with comfort and confidence. Perhaps it’s their attitude that keeps people from bothering them. Size isn’t of much concern to me either, it’s more about the comfort a guy has with himself that I find attractive.

      Jul 23, 2014 at 9:50 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • throwslikeagirl
      throwslikeagirl

      I think this guy’s very funny! It was a cute piece, definitely written with tongue firmly planted in cheek. I’d enjoy reading more of his pieces.

      Jul 24, 2014 at 12:12 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Random
      Random

      @barkomatic: **There’s no point in pining after that identity so I must play up the Daddy thing to please my market.**

      Although this made me laugh, I do think it underlines that sense in the gay community of having to force ourselves into being a ‘type’. I think we’d all be happier if we were just ourselves rather than thinking we must be some sort of marketable stereotype. And besides, 43 really isn’t old enough to be a ‘Daddy’ to an adult male, so not sure how convincing it would be anyway. ;-)

      Jul 30, 2014 at 7:23 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
      PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS

      Hey Blake if you are like the majority of shorter guys I have been with the Penis Fairy more than made up for your short stature with a bigger than average tool…….

      Big things come in small packages :p

      Sep 21, 2014 at 8:54 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

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