
We're not sure if you've heard, but it's Valentine's Day: the darkest day of the year for many of you single folk. Rather than offering tales of love (barf) or romance tips (like we'd share), we've decided to feature an interview with a man who dedicates life – and his passion – to enabling intergenerational relationships. Love does, after all, come in many shapes, sizes and ages.
It all started when former holistic therapist Chris Turner noticed a gaping hole in the world of internet dating. Most sites skewed toward the twink coupling, while older men – daddies, if you will – and their admirers were left out in the technological cold. In an effort to fill this void, Turner founded Daddy Hunt, a personals site for older men and younger men looking for love, lust or just plain sex. Turner even found his own man – author Armistead Maupin – on the site.
With 130,000 members ranging from 18 to the late-90s, Daddy Hunt's more than just an online cruising ground, says Turner, but a "political statement" against "mainstream" aesthetic. Read what else Turner had to say, after the jump.
Andrew Belonsky: Hi Chris! How are you?
Chris Turner: I'm good, thanks!
AB: So, just to establish, you're the founder of DaddyHunt, yes?
CT: Yeah, I actually started my first website about five years ago, it's called Hotoldermale.com. That originally was a confidence site. We kind of had a personal section on there, but the software wasn't that great. I really started it as a hobby and, much to my surprise, it started getting very popular very quickly. After a couple years we decided to split the personals off. I took on a business partner and we formed DaddyHunt as a separate site. It's really only since then that the personals business has really taken off. The other part of the business, Pantheon Productions, focuses on the same group as DaddyHunt: men over forty and their admirers.
AB: Men over forty? So, that's the cut-off?
CT: That's a general guideline – it's what I say, but it's certainly not set in stone. Well, it is for our videos. We always have at least one guy who's over forty years old. And on DaddyHunt, it's much more flexible – there could be a 32-year old looking for a 25-year old, but it's loose.
AB: You define "daddy" as 40 and above – that's your interpretation – but a 32-year old can describe himself as a "daddy". Is "daddy" more than just age?
CT: You know, I think there's all sorts of different interpretations. For me, I think it's just an affectionate term for an older guy. I've always been into guys older than myself. I know a lot of guys have that daddy/boy role play thing – that sort of thing certainly exists in the leather community, as well – but for me it's just an affectionate term for older guys.
AB: So, how does the site work? People go to DaddyHunt.com and they fill out a personal, right? Can you walk me through it?
CT: Um, yeah. The site is 95% free. We don't let guys see all the photos if they're not a supporting member, there are also some advanced search features that don't work if you're not a supporting member, but otherwise you can contact as many people as you want, see as many profiles, navigate the site as much as you want -
AB: Do you have to have your own profile?
CT: Yeah, in order to get in and really start poking around the site. You can do a quick search without having that, which will show you a few pages of profiles. You can't really see much at all until you place your own ad. We don't allow people to put X pictures up front. The reason isn't because we have any issue with those pictures – I think they're great – we just think it creates a more friendly community if people put face pictures up front.
AB: I see…
CT: I get feedback from members all the time and they're just really amazed at how nice guys are on the site. They're nicer than most of the other places they've been on the internet. I think that's largely in part because we require people to put G pictures up front. And, unlike some other sites, it's a place that's not ageist. I don't think it has to be older guys looking for younger guys and vice versa. There are a lot of older guys on the site who are looking for each other. Some guys say to me that he'd like to go on the site, but they don't get into the whole daddy thing and I try to explain to them that it's not some sort of fetish. I really just started to site to create a place that's not ageist.
AB: Do members have complete agency or do you ever step in to help the matchmaking process?
CT: We don't really step in in any way. There are something like 130,000 guys on the site, but there are all kinds of search features and people can see who's online and guys just tend to communicate a lot with each other on the site. I think it just happens naturally. I met my partner – my husband – through the site and I keep hearing from other guys that they're meeting people, too, so it's certainly doing the trick. It's somewhere in-between the hook-up now sites and the sites that are strictly for dating. We're somewhere in the middle there.
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Message to Chris,
Many, Many thanks. My partner is 19 years older than I am. I've always loved my older Gents than the youner ones or even my age. Don't get me wrong, I've loved them all, but there was always been a soft spot for the older man.
I'm glad the site's there, but I'd also tell older guys to GO OUT to bars & clubs. Lots of younger guys are looking for older. (I speak from happy experience.)
What a great Valentine story and about one of my favorite writers.
My hubby and I are celebrating our 20th year together today. Bless his heart.
i am 51 and i don't want to be a fetish object, i don't want someone to love me because i am old.
Log cabintte: I think you miss the point. Everyone starts with some facet of attraction: bushy eyebrows, thin, thick, tall, short, Asian, blond … it goes or not from there.
Young guy looking for daddy
good guy looking for my daddy
I was happilly partnered to the same person for 26 years. He was 12 years my senior. It just happened that way; we were also interracial, and both of us from different rural Texas towns. I miss him terrably, but when I'm ready to get back into the swing of things, I think I will try this internet dating using Daddyhunt.
Congrats for serving us older gents…..Was it Carson McCulla that wrote "….the heart is a lonely hunter?"
Hagerman