Last week, Davey Wavey published a viral rant about the disrespect some young gay men show to older guys, and it struck a real chord with viewers.
Now, he wants to broaden the conversation about what the LGBT community consumes and why we should be opening up our minds a bit more.
Responding to an op-ed at Huffpost Queer Voices (yes, it’s “Queer Voices” now) which suggested there’s a disconnect between his previous videos and the message in his latest, Davey offers some interesting insights about what is valued in the LGBT community and what stories need to be explored a bit more.
He writes:
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
While celebrating the elders in our community — and the sacrifices that they’ve made — is something all of us can stand by, some of the responses have been negative. As someone who has created more than 800 videos over the last 8 years, folks have noted that my content has included a number of young, white, shirtless gay men.
This, they claim, undercuts my anti-ageism message with blatant hypocrisy. But what critics fail to mention is that my videos have also included, in the last year alone, 88 people who aren’t young, cis, white gay men.
Wavey’s videos are a business, and he also makes a pretty good point about what’s consumed the most:
I’m also a business person and creating video content is my job. I’m supported by the ad revenue that my videos generate, and I need to strike a balance. The reality is, my videos with shirtless, young gay guys get a disproportionate amount of views because that’s what our community consumes most.
He wraps up his response by saying he’d “love to hear more suggestions” in the spirit of “open and productive dialogue.” Frankly, we’d suggest he just keeps on doing what he’s doing.
Look, porn and gay magazine covers pretty much reinforce the idealized view of white masculinity and if you think it’s anything new for the LGBT community, it isn’t. If that’s who you are/what you’re all about, that’s fine.
The rest of us have to work a bit harder to seek representation, but lucky for us it’s 2016 and not 1986 and there’s a world of stuff out there just waiting to be discovered. Davey’s obviously trying to balance more important videos with the T&A that pays the bills, so good for him.
As for us, we stopped buying into the standards of attractiveness pushed by the mainstream gay community long ago. For your sanity, we suggest you do the same.
Bob LaBlah
Hey Davey. I love your videos and your folksy manner. Where are you from? I always felt you had good manners because no matter the subject of your video it ends on a note that isn’t repulsive, though the start of them had me braced for that many times. The one about the sex toys is what comes to mind and I still laugh at it.
I do wish you would do one in regards to people preying on the elderly. That is a problem that goes unaddressed in the gay community also. One incident in particular that stands out is how an elder gay man in Baltimore/Washington D.C. area made the mistake of letting a predator into his life. The only reason why his buried body was found was because on of his killers got arrested three years later and offered to turn in who actually killed him in return for a lighter sentence. I kid you not. The poor guy had no family nor friends to check on him which is how they got away for so long until one of them was arrested.
Thanks and keep those vids coming.
Stache
“As for us, we stopped buying into the standards of attractiveness pushed by the mainstream gay community long ago. For your sanity, we suggest you do the same.”
I’ll be waiting then for the over 40 non white shirtless guy along with a great fluff piece of them talking about something meaningless. Lol
1898
can we take up a collection to help him get a shirt?
Billy Budd
I personally think Davey Wavey is repulsive.
Markajv
I watched one of his videos after seeing a lot of “Hate” about him and I felt like I was watching every stereotypical gay male. It was all about, looks, body, sex, no shirts, underwear, porn……I swear I stopped and thought “wow he is proving how I feel about the Gay Communities portrayal of itself….almost like the Gay Community worked with Fox news.
If he is so not well liked why is he even written or talked about? Is it because of how he made me feel. (Body image issues, Looks, self image issues, rejection issues?? – Which I really hate to say I developed from trying to fit into the gay “So Called” lifestyle and just got disgusted at the hypocrisy) I would never watch his channel again. Sorry I needed a rant.
Mandrake
I really don’t know where you anti-Davey Wavey critics are coming from. Envy? Self-pity because you can’t imagine yourself with somebody as witty, humorous, and satirical? I am 69 years old as of last month, and I love his video clips! He does what entertains and hopefully educates with humor. He’s not out to diversify with every demographic under the sun to be fully inclusive. He was right on the mark regarding a segment of young gays’ attitudes toward elderly gay men.
As a gay guy who takes care of himself cerebrally as well as physically, I wouldn’t mind being his “daddy” in a heartbeat. He’s A-OK by me!
SeijnSei
@Billy Budd:
I find him replusive as well.
You know exactly what you are doing and why. It is boys/men like that who are doing a huge disservice to the gay community under the guise of “its a business”. Your business is divisiveness and hatred.
Spike
Please, this dimwit needs to just stop talking, esp about agism. You want to throw up more then just a little in your mouth, give the following a looksee, this himbos first visit to a bathhouse . . .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zyFBfgmWlaY
Doughosier
@Markajv: I see him every now and then walking around my neighborhood, in West Hollywood, and he’s very tiny. Probably not more than 5′ 5.
Stache
@Spike: Yes we got it. 2. The guys in the BH are old fat trolls to you. 2. Of coarse they’re so hot that everyone must assume their “hookers”.
Stache
Speaking of hookers you take your clothes off for $. What exactly is the difference again?
OzJosh
Has anyone ever seen anyone over 35 in a Davey Wavey video. No? Case closed on his hypocrisy then.
Stache
@OzJosh: That’s not true. Look at that video spike posted. He talked about them allot. Ok maybe more like ewww…but at least it’s the first time he’s talked about those over 35 and sex.
sesfm
I guess it’s good at he realizes this, though it’s still pretty sad that he has no plan to contaminate his channel with people who aren’t fit and attractive. Though to his credit, he probably has no idea that those people exist.
DCguy
I didn’t think he was being hypocritical, because he didn’t say that guys should date older men, or that older men should be considered attractive to everybody etc… He just said threat them with respect because a lot of the freedoms you have ere fought for by them.
So bashing the guy for not having older people in his vids I don’t think is fair because that wasn’t the topic of his post.
I’ve never beeen a huge fan, but on this issue I think he’s getting the short end of the stick.
Daniel Bujes
Are you really standing by this claim?
” As for us, we stopped buying into the standards of attractiveness pushed by the mainstream gay community long ago. ”
A majority of your articles are about the pretty boys and parties and porn stars of WeHo. Your writers make 1 substantial article every 3 or so months: in which you dilute it so your and your writer opinions don’t actually stand for anything and are vague. You also shamelessly promote Davey’s videos that perpetuate what he claims he is against.
Mack
@Mandrake: As a 68 year old I agree. We might not be a tight bodied man, but the experience is well worth the try.
CWM85
The mention of skin color or white masculinity was uncalled for once again queerty. Other racial, ethnic groups their own porn vids and mags because I have seen them all. Most of black porn the dudes act like they are yo boys and and hyper masculine and latino gay porn its always the stereotypical Ways Latinos are portrayed. Not everything is about race. Smh. I know its popular in liberal circles to cry out racism on everything but this example is not true.
CWM85
And queery do your part by showcasing more black, latin, asian men. 90 percent content is about white young men so its a bit of hypocrisy to mention diversity when you’re part of the problem! Smh
jud
what assholes most of you are!
I’m 67–go to gay bars—get ignored mostly—–young guys who like older men are shunned by their freaky friends–but now and then I’ll hook up—and it’s great—so it’s worth it for me
fuck you ageists—when you get older, then you’ll know something
Bob LaBlah
@Mandrake….I am fifty-eight (or soon will be) have asked many a twink who come up to me at bars “is that six-pack because of workouts or because of missed meals?” When I say missed meals I say it in a tone that translates “is it because you have no money to buy food”. Usually the hustlers then take that as their cue to get going, cause I aint paying. It worked every time.
Isn’t it wonderful to have matured and have the wisdom to show for it? I wouldn’t turn ol’ Davey down but I also wouldn’t be disappointed if he told me flat out NO. Those I appreciate. They are also the ones I laugh at when they get denied entrance to the gym because they had not made their monthly payment and the looks on their faces when the reality of just how far being nothing but young and cute will get you.
I tell you (as you probably well know), “old” age is wonderful, depending on how you matured and look at life.
Mandrake
@Bob LaBlah….You are so on target! Maturity and the history of experience suits us well today. Anybody under 40 cannot understand that, but we can’t blame them. Older gay men are misunderstood, but we know to look out for ourselves from past personal history. With a positive attitude about aging as gay men, we are certainly not ready to throw in the towel.
Glen Martin Fitch
You can respect a pack of abs, but it’s a belly you fall in love with.
spiffy
I guess people like Wavey are not allowed to grow personally and professionally.
A lot of these so-called haters are just defensive about their ageism, plain and simple. Pretty similar to those advertising publicly no fats/fem/blacks/Asians on their Grindr profiles “just a preference.”
(He did a video about that a few months ago also.)
Davey knows who his audiences are; if he can use his videos as a vehicle to educate the youngsters about RESPECT, why not?
Carlos Zuniga
This article is very complacent and somewhat condescending.
Pistolo
I used to like him way back when, when he had only a couple videos. But over time he started to get preachy about philosophy and some of his arguments he put forth were obviously flawed and often defensive, almost angry. He presents himself as so enlightened but it’s always people like that who are the most self-aggrandizing and self-satisfied, if you’re really resolved in your beliefs you don’t need to always be talking about it. I don’t HATE him, I just think he’s a lot less wise, a lot less clever than he wants to believe.
Wilson W Wong
maybe he should just stop making videos…
BlogShag
@Stache: It is interesting how it’s usually the ugly, bald, fat, pot bellied gay guys with death breath that usually have responses like this. Jealous much?
Bob LaBlah
@spiffy: “Pretty similar to those advertising publicly no fats/fem/blacks/Asians on their Grindr profiles “just a preference.”
I have always felt that if one is that “hot” but has to resort to putting the equivalent of an advertisement on the web looking for sex then something is seriously wrong with that person instead of those who respond out of spite, as in knowing they are not what the person is looking for.
I mean really, they are laying claim to being Mr. Body Beautiful and saying no to damn near everything that responds while showing they are nothing more than “my way or the highway brats” is a bit much in my book. I wonder how many times they have been rejected by what they thought was going to come over and praise their dirty underwear?
Bob LaBlah
@Mandrake: I wish you and I lived in the same city. I bet we would be rolling all over the floor laughing at the times when we were approached by people who honestly didn’t think we would notice the neon signs blaring “full of it” in the middle of their foreheads. And the looks on their faces when they only dug the hole deeper and deeper by lying even more. LOL
I swear some times I really do miss NYC. After the laughter I come to my senses and realize how smart I was to get the hell out of there too (20 years in Manhattan). Usually within the first thirty seconds after I finish laughing.
BlogShag
I find all the anti-Davey Wavey sentiment disgusting and offensive. No one is forcing you ugly queens to watch his videos. they are very easy to ignore
You are just jealous of people that are able to be themselves
Transiteer
Its too bad that as all of us have been the target of abusive, dismissive and just mean-spirited behavior by others, that we choose to do it to others within our own Tribe. Being gay is like being left-handed – you were born this way, and come in all shapes, sizes, colours, strengths, talents, and ages. People are people, especially OUR people. Manners are never out of style, gay or straight and it would be nice to see more on display more often. I too enjoy a little bitchiness, but it’s better on film than in person, and don’t make it mean. Tallulah Bankhead said once of lesbians – ‘If they want to be men, why don’t they want to be nice men?’ (probably paraphrasing). Let’s show our diversity and our compassion towards others. The injured often strike out at others. Heal thyself, and get along. Life is far too short not to enjoy all you can with as many as you choose.
Transiteer
@Billy Budd: Then watch someone else. Easily resolved.
Transiteer
@Wilson W Wong: or you just stop watching . . . move on…
Ummmm Yeah
I’m middle age. Don’t you dare add me to the list of losers trying to get a guilt fuck out of young, athletic, white guys. If someone doesn’t want to talk to me for whatever reason, that’s fine. I’m not needy. I do just fine without having to pressure anyone for friendship, sex or anything else.
Spike
Ya think when he’s 50+ he will be posting videos about how younger guys really need to be ore accepting of older gays, blah blah blah . . . just maybe?
Fern8783
Davey Wavey looks like what you’d get if a Soccer Mom slept with a gay man.
DCguy
@BlogShag: you stated: I find all the anti-Davey Wavey sentiment disgusting and offensive. No one is forcing you ugly queens to watch his videos. they are very easy to ignore.
You actually just gave ammunition to all of the people attacking him. Look at you, you are so shallow and ridiculously bitter that your biggest attack was to call anybody who didn’t agree with you, whom you can’t see in person “ugly”.
You literally backed up all of the “Haters” statements.
drivendervish
Davey Wavey is no different than any other media outlet that pays the bills with sexy stories while devoting what’s left of their time or space to report on important issues we should be interested in but for the most part aren’t. The problem of the younger gay community showing little respect for the older gay community results from them only being exposed to older guys at bars and clubs who are looking for sex, like everybody else, and younger guys just don’t want to bother with their clumsy advances. If they were exposed to successful, older men with long-term partners they would have the opportunity to learn from them without having to worry about being groped. But these men can rarely be found at clubs and bars.
Stache
@drivendervish:Not sure where you come from but anyone who “gropes” out a bar is disgusting and you generalizing that most older men who go out to bars and clubs as that way is equally disgusting.
“report on important issues we should be interested in but for the most part aren’t.”. You mean issues like healthcare for LGBT’s, housing for gay elders, etc? What is so important that he does?
Kyle Duncan
Who the hell cares? He’s a hack and a has been.
youarekiddingme
Who cares…He’s a YouTube “star.” Here today, gone tomorrow. He will make his money and move on. Using his looks and body to make money (kinda like models)? If we don’t like him, we don’t watch him/don’t subscribe. He will make NO difference in the wold. He’s not a politician. He’s not a spokesman or representative of our community. He’s an individual with a YouTube Channel who has an opinion. Nothing more. He has Zero Influence.
thespian12
Davey Wavey is a shit excuse for a content creator so I think his attempt at self righteousness is ironic. Not ironic as the site tho. Queerty is a have of white gay male worship continually perpetuated each week.
Creamsicle
He’s free to make whatever content he wants, but the accusations of hypocrisy are well founded. If he’s seeing a big difference in views in videos with shirtless young white gays then maybe he should call out his viewers on it. Just being a matter of business doesn’t excuse that tendency. You either have principles or you don’t. If your principles can be bought then you don’t have any anymore. If that’s the case then stop lecturing people and just make more vapid eye candy.
Large Marge
Davey is a relatively young guy likely with relatively young friends. He makes videos about what he knows… and he knows that white shirtless young guys get views and ad revenue.
He’s not a damn journalist. He can voice his opinion that older gays deserve respect and still have have channel be primarily about young, half naked guys. One doesn’t prevent the other… and remember, this is his job… it’s how he makes his money. When the money comes from young shirtless white guys, it’d be stupid for him to change the format, but he has had a lot of non young, non white, even non guys on the show the last year.
This claim of hypocrisy is absurd. It’s like claiming Disney is hypocritical because they only make films for kids… and not adults.
Stefan
I’m an older gay man who is confident enough to not define by value by what others think of me–especially Davey Wavey. I knew who I was in my twenties and would never want to go back there! The gay media wants you to think you have to wear Andrew Christian briefs, and a six pack and have “followers” to be of any value –but none of those things are of any substance. Learn to love yourself and be happy who you are and never let the opinions of others affect your self worth.
Bob LaBlah
@Stefan: “Learn to love yourself and be happy who you are and never let the opinions of others affect your self worth.”
I couldn’t agree more but if that advice is followed then the sales of those flimsy items meant for the histrionic would stop flying off of the shelves and webpages. The guy you mentioned is so popular he could actually charge any media outlet for the use of his name and gear instead of him paying them for the same privilege. That is the world we live in.
DarkZephyr
@CWM85: I don’t agree that Queerty is being hypocritical. I think that they are a business like Davey Wavey’s channel is. I think that like him, he is giving “the people what they want”. I think the real hypocrisy lies with the consumer base. Hits talk more than outraged posts do. Not everyone who visits Queerty comments and they get more hits on the shirtless white dude and Latino posts than they do the others unfortunately, regardless of the “not more white guys” complaint posts they get. The unspoken “yay more hot waxed white guy!” articles get more hits, plain and simple. So authors of particular articles can honestly say that THEY personally have given up “buying into the standards of attractiveness pushed by the mainstream gay community long ago” and not have it be hypocritical. By the way, I think that it is of note that Rob Smith, the author of this article happens to be a (very attractive and cute) black man.
TheFinalWord
Shake Shack has lines out the door because they make great burgers and they know their clientele. If you want a salad, go elsewhere.
Davey Wavey gives his audience what they want; skin.
If you’re so offended, don’t watch his channel. Instead, seek out one of the of the many, many vloggers of color.
If you want beef or salad, there’s a line for you.