Great news for Colorado’s homosexuals: The Catholic Diocese of Colorado Springs is launching a new 12-step program to help cure you of The Gay. But don’t confuse the new system for some quack therapy outfit, insists the Rev. Larry Brennan, a director there. “It’s not about therapy and not about activism. It’s about support.” Just like British lawmaker Roger Helmer, Brennan sees the 12-step system as merely one of many options for gay Catholics: “The people we want to reach are those who experience this as a burden.” So Step 1 now reads: “We admitted we were powerless over homosexuality—that our lives had become unmanageable.” But can Step 4 — “Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves” — at least come with a same-sex pat down?