Mock Swearing In – 109th Congress

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Ex-Benedict: Queerty Picks The Next Pope

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By: Lester Brathwaite
On: Feb 15, 2013
Tagged: andre leon talley, Beyonce, Ellen DeGeneres, Jon Stewart, Oprah, Oprah Winfrey, Pope Benedict XVI, todd akin

11 Comments

No. 1 · Sebastian
Electing a Pope is not a thing to make fun of.

Feb 15, 2013 at 2:33 pm · @Reply ·
No. 2 · Dakotahgeo
@Sebastian: It is when the last 600 years have seen some real comedians wearing the red beanie!

Feb 15, 2013 at 3:12 pm · @Reply ·
No. 3 · Scribe38
@Sebastian: When the church stops hurting gays, women and children we will stop making fun of the dude in the funny hat and long dress. B.t.w queerty poprah REALLY DID MAKE ME LOL. good stuff Lester

Feb 15, 2013 at 5:12 pm · @Reply ·
No. 4 · 2eo
I’ve got 50p riding on Richard Dawkins at 666/1.

Seriously, not a joke.

Feb 15, 2013 at 6:35 pm · @Reply ·
No. 5 · Sebastian
@Dakotahgeo: It is 2000 thousand years of Pope’s since the 1st Pope Peter not 600 years

Feb 15, 2013 at 7:35 pm · @Reply ·
No. 6 · the other Greg
Believe it or not, there was actually a Pope Hilarius (reigned 461-468).

So most likely Ellen or Jon would choose the name Hilarius II, if Stephen Colbert didn’t get to it first.

Feb 15, 2013 at 9:35 pm · @Reply ·
No. 7 · timelord89
Personally I just hope G-d pulls a divine intervention and puts Sister Simone Campbell or any of the other controversial heads of Catholic Sisterhoods the Vatican has been freaking out over. Seriously, the Vatican needs to stop freaking out over the fact that nuns have been finding it ridiculous to promote homophobia and anti-women matters, it’s the nuns who actually do all the work against social injustice rarely the priests or those in the Vatican. Hey I can dream right. It would be great, could you just imagine all the cardinals shitting their robes if a divine intervention was to occur. The new teaching of the Church is that G-d is beyond gender, so shouldn’t the pope. Hehehehehe I am an awful youth minister, but the new archbishop in my area is pissing on the project that I have been working on for the past 9 years.

Feb 16, 2013 at 5:36 am · @Reply ·
No. 8 · 2eo
@Sebastian: So the massive paedophilia and genocide goes back even further.

Yeah, way to go.

Feb 16, 2013 at 6:25 am · @Reply ·
No. 9 · Dakotahgeo
@Sebastian: I know my church history… it has been 600 years since the last POOP, errr, Pope, resigned. And 2000 years of Poophood is about 3,000 years too long. !

Feb 16, 2013 at 4:11 pm · @Reply ·
No. 10 · hephaestion
@Sebastian: Electing a Pope IS a joke. All Popes have been assholes except for Pope John Paul I, so naturally the Vatican murdered him within 2 months of his becoming Pope. He had the audacity to try to practice Christianity.

Feb 16, 2013 at 8:15 pm · @Reply ·
No. 11 · Burlington
@hephaestion:Congratulations! You must have a fabulous memory to say all Popes are assholes. There has been an unbroken line of 266 popes from St. Peter ( Mathew 16: 17-19 ) to the current Benedict XVI and 30 anti-popes ( Man who claimed to be pope but were not validly elected )…and think you know in deep all their lives and the times that they live to do such statement!

Feb 18, 2013 at 3:07 am · @Reply ·