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Exodus International’s Randy Thomas Is Uninsurable

What has Obamacare done for you lately? It hasn’t helped Randy Thomas, executive vice president of heterosexuality-for-gays organization Exodus International, figure out why his abdomen hurt so much! And that hasn’t helped him get life insurance coverage. Sads!

“[M]y life insurance application was declined over the medical results from my blood test,” writes over-sharing Randy on his blog. “Still haven’t heard from the Life Insurance company as to why. Yesterday, I tried my best to be gracious and sent a strong email telling them I wanted those results yesterday and how unproductive it was to call me and tell me I had been declined without explaining to me why. Not helpful and made for a really grumpa randa. I have some guesses: being fat + hepatitis B background = risk, high cholesterol, liver stuff (again a result of the Hepatitis.) An FYI, I got Hepatitis B through the hellhole of an elementary school I went to. It was condemned as a health hazard the year after I left it. You normally get Hepatitis from the exchange of bodily fluids but they think I got it either through the DISGUSTING bathrooms or the water fountains. I wasn’t the only kid that got it. The whole school had to get shots after I was diagnosed.”

Or maybe Randy told his life insurance company he hasn’t had sex in 18 years, and they know men actively copulating tend to live longer — and thus those who don’t are likely to die sooner, making them bigger insurance risks.

Either way, get better Randy! We need you better for your next event.

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