Single and sad on Valentine’s Day? Don’t worry—there’s nothing a pint of ice cream, a romantic comedy marathon and a little wishful thinking can’t fix.
If you’re stuck inside tonight while all of your friends are out celebrating the relationships they’ll forget by this time next year, try wishing yourself into a great gay relationship. It probably won’t get you anywhere in landing a real gay relationship, but it’s worth a try, right?
Did we mention how fun it is?
Here are the five biggest gay celebrity power couples we wish were together tonight:
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
Ricky Martin and Marc Jacobs
A newly single Ricky Martin may not be looking for a brand new man right now, but that shouldn’t stop him from spending a few hours soaking up the sun with Marc Jacobs. The fashion mogul most recently broke up with porn star boyfriend Harry Louis—the man oft seen covering him in lotion on Brazilian beaches—and we must say, this hunky couple would look pretty damn perfect together.
Why settle for a throuple when you can have a fourple? Dan Savage has been pretty open about his “monogamish” relationship with husband Terry Miller, an underwear model who hosts leather parties in Seattle, so it’s not a stretch to imagine him shacking up with famed power duo Tom Daley and Dustin Lance Black. Tom and Terry would have so much in common, and we already know Tom likes older dudes—we’d be lying if we said we hadn’t thought about this specific match a hundred times before today.
Aaron Schock and Clay Aiken
Perhaps recently outed GOP Congressman Aaron Schock could help Clay Aiken get his political career off the ground? Aiken, a noted lover of the muscled male form, could also provide great cover for his new man—he perfected the art of covering up his sexuality for years before coming out in 2008.
Never mind the fact that Robbie is happily taken and Michael probably is too. Assuming Michael is drafted by the NFL and becomes the first openly gay football player in a major league, his relationship with American soccer’s first openly gay player would work wonders to clean up issues facing LGBT athletes.
Perez Hilton and Nick Gruber
Lord knows gossip blogger Perez Hilton and straight businessman Nick Gruber both love publicity, and what better to spark a media firestorm than a brand new love affair? At the very least, we could probably count on Hilton to deliver that much anticipated Nick Gruber sex tape nobody asked for but everyone wants.
balehead
Gross opportunists mostly…
balehead
Besides Robbie Rogers is too busy being a “Golddigga”…..
NG22
No shade to Clay Aiken, but the Congressman could do far better. That’s not the best pic of him, but he’s a gorgeous man. His votes and record are inexcusable, but he can, and likely does, do better. Did you guys try to find the worst pic of Clay, or was that the best you could get? Legitimate question.
That Daley/Lance/Savage/Terry foursome would be some hot fucking. I want to see a sex tape of that orgy.
Perez Hilton scares me. Honestly. I didn’t like him when he was overweight, but he actually scares me now. Is he mentally stable? Who the hell gave him a kid? And he looks like Ron Pearlman in the face, but somehow less sexy. I know that body was surgically enhanced to remove excess skin, and who knows what else?
tchuy03
Gay celebrity power Clay Aiken????
KittyLitter
Ewww.
Although the Tom Daley pairing is much better than his real BF.
stanhope
Dearest, 2 bottoms don’t make a good marriage. Of the lot here, only Michael Sam and Ricky Martin would stand a snowball’s chance in hell. Call Treasure Island Media…that’s a movie I’d love to see. Snowballs anyone?
Toby Ross
Perez Hilton in a marriage? I would not want to inflict that torture on anyone.
Cam
LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok, this was funny! However, what did poor Ricky Martin every do to anybody that he should be put together with that insecure Meth Monster Marc Jacobs?! She Bangs wasn’t THAT bad a song was it!?!?!?
PARKAVMAN
Was this suppose to be serious. Many could do a lot better. Some have BFs don’t they? Trying to stir up some s***?
jaleoman
Not Marc Jacobs for Ricky. Ricky Martin still hold the record as the man that has appeared more
Times on the cover of ” People in Español” as the most beautiful men.
He is a very handsome, but also very nice guy, and still a huge star in many countries.
For Ricky, Nathan Berkus would be a good match.
wiredpup
Ugh more Perez huh? Really?
jaleoman
Perez Hilton looks ridiculous.
balehead
Hopefully two of these relationships would end in a murder/suicide…any guesses?….
dougmc92
you should do a gay celeb pairing with a closet case…
1- Ricky Martin and Antonio Banderas
2- Tom Daley and Taylor Lautner
3- Michael Sam and Aaron Rodgers
4- Robbie Rogers and Chace Crawford
5- Jonathan Groff and Matthew Morrison
Mezaien
Michael Sam, my man you`ll always be my hottest man on the net. WOW how I wish you were mine.
yaoming
@dougmc92: Much better. You should be writing this.
jaleoman
@ dougmc 92, good one buddy. Wondering who
We are going to pair with the closet cases : John
Travolta, Tyler Perry and Queen Latifah?
davincibarnette
What a sad day. This is all you had to work with today.
dougmc92
@jaleoman: huummmm…Travolta and David Geffen, Perry and Boy George, Latifah and Wanda Sykes….of course- we could put Medea and Latifah together 🙂
jaleoman
@ Doug, good job, those are a good pairs, I find funny Perry and Boy George.
ppp111
Not to get off track but if Sam is drafted I can imagine the closeted players that may approach him, discreetly of course. One can only hope that his presence will give others the courage they may need to be true to themselves. Ah well.
Respect4all
Why?
tohe
@Toby Ross: Nick can handle it lol.
Daveliam
Oh! SO close. This Queerty article included Tom Daley, Robbie Rogers, AND Nick Gruber. If only they put Dustin Zito in it and we would have had a perfectly desperate and douchey fanboy Queerty article. So close. I guess I’m going to have to wait for St. Patrick’s Day. I’m sure they all wore green at some point, right?
inbama
Should be Perez Hilton and Michael Lucas.
yaletownman
I feel like I should call child social services on you Queerty. Dustin Lance Bass and now Terry Miller and you know Dan is going to join in on that bang as well. Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeew!
dougmc92
@ppp111: closeted players won’t come within a mile of Sam- they’ll fear being seen with him might bring them into question….some str8 players will probably avoid him for fear of being thought of/considered gay. Lookl at Tom Daley and his diving friends. Half the pics out there of Chris Mears and Jack Laugher used to contain Daley. The 3 were at the British Nationals last week- every diving competiton in the past- there were dozens of pics of the 3 together- this events- ZERO!!!!
Queer Was Here
Wow, these couples would make strange babies…
Gigi Gee
All of these pairings are HORRIBLE.
Niall
Even if it’s a “joke”. I always have an issue when the pairing in question are already with other people, especially the guy who’s married to Dan Savage. Besides Tom Daley could do much better.
@NG22: For some reason I misread your comment and thought you were referring to Clay Aiken as the gorgeous one, lmao. No offence to Clay Aiken though. But yeah, you’re right, despite Schock being a repulsive prick, he’s kinda handsome.
LadyL
@dougmc92: Such a depressing thought, but you may be right. Though I hope there will be some straight players who are secure enough that they will offer Sam open friendship and support.
Not to get too off-topic, and I don’t quite know how to say this, but I feel very protective of Michael Sam. It’s a bitter joke to listen to homophobe idiots blather on about football being a “manly man’s game.” Do they really not get that it takes a REAL man to stand up like he has? I wish the best for him. He should be rewarded for his integrity and courage, not punished, and I pray the NFL, the press, and the fans don’t mistreat him.
dougmc92
oh- there WILL be some cool players- I just meant a few str8 and all the closet cases 🙂
enlightenone
@Niall: It would be great if people would let Tom Daley grow up a little (and allow himself)than have him “coupled” with these more “worldly men.”
enlightenone
@LadyL: I think he will be able to hold his own, but he will need someone more evolved and of substance than his current twink boyfriend – his choice of course.
darkanser
I have to say…..Perez Hilton.. best Halloween costume ever!!!….truly terrifying!!!…(Oh wait, that wasn’t a costume???)