Foley’s No Kiddie Loving Perv…

Poor Mark Foley. First, his proclivity for exchanging sexually explicit messages with underage boys ruins his career, now he’s forced to confront another lurking problem: alcoholism. Oh so regretful, Foley writes:

Painfully, the events that led to my resignation have crystallized recognition of my longstanding significant alcohol and emotional difficulties. I strongly believe that I am an alcoholic and have accepted the need for immediate treatment for alcoholism and related behavioral problems.

Sorry, Markie-Boy, but the “I was too drunk to realize that I was trying to carry on with young boys” defense probably won’t cut it. If we were him, we’d at least throw in an illicit substance. Coke may be a bit too much for his tarnished image, but maybe a spliff or two could be employed to cloud his judgement.

At least at rehab he won’t have to dodge the pesky photogs who feast on disgrace like vultures.