Here’s a lesson for any social conservative out there who knows deep down that their beliefs are utter hogwash but is too scared or stubborn to “come out” as a rational human being: it’s OK!
You can drop the act.
While we can’t say we won’t hold someone’s antigay past against them, transformation is always possible, and ironically, these folk actually have the power to affect the most change in their communities. Everyone loves a good comeback story (hang in there Anne Hathaway).
Related: Alan Chambers Explains Why Exodus International Didn’t Work
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
Meet Wendy Gritter, for instance.
For years, Wendy led the ex-gay ministry New Direction (an affiliate of Exodus International), not to be confused with the pseudo-gay One Direction.
Her mission was to cure gay people, but she soon realized she was doing more harm than good, which isn’t really a fair statement as it implies she was doing some good to begin with.
Related: Behind The Scenes At “Journey Into Manhood,” One Of America’s Many Ex-Gay Treatment Centers
She put the pieces together — you’ve got this, Wendy! — and publicly apologized for all the harm she’s done. Now she’s working to right her wrongs.
“It was kind of a mindfuck to realize the thing I was leading had traumatized people to the point of suicidal ideation,” she says in the below video.
She also started swearing, and officiating gay weddings. Dreams really do come true.
Watch more of her story below:
Grant Mealey
Well…..better late then never? I guess ð???ð???
Sebastian Holiday
Good man. Saved. Now doesn’t make you feel a whole lot better?
SteveDenver
It’s difficult to admit one’s wrongs.
Hard still to admit it publicly.
And it’s commendable to try and right one’s wrongs.
Good for Wendy!
As an ally, she will be able to take down people and groups that think the way she used to.
Tombear
Years ago when I was a teenager I was forced to go to Exodus International. It took me years of therapy and a career in the Marine Corps to accept my authentic self. Today I am an out and open professional gay man with a wonderful husband and parents who finally accept me! My mother loves my husband more than she does me! The people I kept in touch with from my Exodus days have all reverted back to homosexuality. The fact is Exodus teaches you to be celibate. Nothing angrier than a celibate gay man!
OzJosh
Because who wouldn’t want to be married by a former “ex-gay” therapist?!
James Hart
Homosexuality is like any other addiction (drug, alcohol, food). A person may be biologically pre-disposed to it, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be resisted. If you have a will, there is a way. Let Jesus free you from your sexual slavery. I don’t think you’ll become straight, but I do believe that you’ll finally know what true freedom is after you set aside the heavy burden of homosexuality. Right now you are in denial. Tell Jesus that you want Him to come into your heart and you want to accept Him as your personal Lord and Savior. Take that first step. Don’t live another day in a squalid gay culture where people are only interested in using and abusing you. Where they only see you as a means to an end (their sexual gratification). Where what you are on the outside is the only thing that matters. These other gays don’t care about who you are on the inside. They’ll use you, steal from you, cheat on you, and then, when something better comes along, kick you to the curb. You know that what I’m saying is true. In your heart, you know I’m telling you the truth. Accept Jesus as your Lord and then get yourself into a good, Bible-believing church. Godspeed and Jesus loves you.
Josh447
James Hart,
Gay people all the love everyday and many of them get married. Kind of blows your theory doesn’t it dum dum? As if Cheistian str8s have a corner on a perfect relationship, with their harrowing 50% divorce rate.
Either you’re a really screwed up cult ridden control freak straight guy who doesn’t know jack twiddle about human sexuality, and gets his psycho sexual education from a bunch of ancient Jewish homophobic straight men (Jesus excluded) that wrote the Bible at their whim, or you’re a really mixed up gay/bi dude who can’t accept the fact he’s a flaming gay/bi in denial. Care to share which one?
enlightenone
@James Hart: Your horns are showing!!!!!!
GG
@James Hart: Prove it.
Goforit
@James Hart: Since when did homosexuality become an addiction? If you begin a theory with a false premise, the entire thought process from there on is corrupted. That corruption is then amplified during each successive step in your thought process until coming to your preposterous conclusions. As evidence, simply replace “homosexuality” in your first sentence, with “heterosexuality”
1EqualityUSA
James Hart, You speak of my spouse and I as though you know us. You do not know us. I also suspect your motives as to why this is your big issue. It says more about you than it does us. What a load, as if Jesus would want us all to be disingenuous liars, living inauthentic lives, just to make you feel at ease. Believe whatever the Hell you want, just don’t push your religious beliefs onto our civil laws.
JessPH
She was healed
JessPH
@James Hart: Sorry, dear, but I stopped believing in imaginary beings like Santa Claus, Jesus or God when I grew up and grew a brain.
girldownunder
@JessPH: True
martinbakman
@James Hart: Squalid gay subculture? You’ve been reading too much Queerty again, haven’t you.
When I hear people like you talk about turning away from their attractions to men, I am convinced many of you folks are truly bisexual people that find a way to put their same sex attractions in the back of the closet and move on with your traditional lifestyle, and then expect all gay men should be able to follow suit.
See you in church.
b2rocketfan
As a Post ex-gay person, all I can say is that I spent 22 years (99% on my own) trying to un-gay myself. I read every book there was, attended two exodus national conferences, sought out counselors, joined a yahoo group, ? I mean, I was dedicated. Not to mention all the prayer and bible reading. 24 years later, all I can say is that Nothing changed. I decided it was time to accept myself and not worry about trying to be someone else. I spent years trying to become my “authentic self” never realizing I was actually putting a big mask on of pseudo-heterosexuality. Wow. For me, it was when Exodus shut its doors (Yay!) and the top leaders were either apologizing or were simply bring who they are: Gay.
So, while there have been a lot of bad things in the past, I’m so happy that my journey lead me to where I am a proud gay man with a partner of tow and a half years. (Btw: we met on Growlr for a one night stand and ended up falling in love!)
If anyone wants to argue the bible, please realize you’re wasting your time. Also, if you want to gripe about me wasting 22 years, still wasting ya time. ?
GayEGO
@James Hart: Since God created us, I was born gay and I remember when I was born which my mother verified. My life started to soar when I was 20 in 1961 and I knew the only life for me was to be myself, a gay man. I met my lifetime partner in 1962 and we got married in 2004 in Massachusetts. We are now both retired and living the American dream, that is pretty normal to me. Each of us can only know ourselves and you are just repeating a bunch of nonsense you heard or read. And just for your information I tried dating girls when I was a teenager and my willy went to sleep. On the other hand, the guys I was attracted to made my willy stand at attention. But this is not just about sex this is about deep, loving, relationships and mine is supposed to be with a man as only I can know.
GayEGO
@Josh447: Right on and well said!
James Hart
@Goforit:
The latest research in neuro-science proves that when a person continually engages in the same behavior over and over (like gay sex), they become addicted to it because they have created many neural pathways in the brain due to the continual practice of the behavior. The behavior becomes an obsessive-compulsion, like over-eating, drinking alcohol to excess, or engaging in gay sex. You should read some books about neural plasticity because they address these issues of addiction.
JessPH
@James Hart: That’s funny because there are gays who got married to people of the opposite gender and engaged in countless heterosexual behavior yet they’re admitting to remaining gay.
James Hart
@b2rocketfan:
By living in sin, you obviously haven’t truly accepted Jesus as the Lord of your life. Jesus loves you. Godspeed.
James Hart
@JessPH: I guess they’re very addicted to their sins
James Hart
@GayEGO: May God heal you.
James Hart
@martinbakman: Just because you attend church does not mean you are saved by the Blood of the Jesus. Only a commitment by you to accept Jesus and all of His teachings, in their entirety, will you be cleansed and saved. Godspeed.
James Hart
@JessPH: I’m sorry that you are missing out on the greatest beauty of God’s gifts: The gift of faith.
Josh447
Josh Hart,
Didn’t you get the news? Jesus Christ has returned and dictated His first book in His own words in first person to The Grand Jahwshuan Scribe David Michael Wakefield called Arclight Book One: The Decade of Correction. It was just published. It’s magnificent. It’s one of the most profound books ever written. And it marks the inception of Jahwshuan Christianity, the true authentic non-judgmental healing Christianity that you have lost complete sight of due to evil psychotic false “god’s” ruling your thoughts. Thank God He finally returned to clear up this mess.
JC doesn’t approve of people using His name to be “saved” by a bloody mess of a torture tool called “the cross”. Nor does He approve of a person such as yourself using His name to make condescending remarks to imply judgment guilt and death towards His brothers and sisters, which you are. You are using irrational thought, your self imposed Anti-Christic brain in action to damage humanity.
Now, (WE?) I will NOT pray or waste our?/my breath for your redemption bc you aren’t ready for it. From Jesus Christ’s viewpoint, you’re still very mentally ill and uniformly unteachable. But just for starters, try having a conversation WITH your self imposed enemies, instead of AT them, if that doesn’t horrify you too much, as you are overly filled with fear.
So. Until you wise up and get off your religious crak addiction most likely due to your own personal sexual psychosis, most likely your insatiable PORN ADDICTION; at Godspeed, you might move back to your perch until when you speak, you actually make sense.
b2rocketfan
@James Hart: Thank you for your reply. As no man knows my heart, then you can’t possibly know where I stand as far as being a believer in Jesus Christ. Disagreeing on sin doesn’t mean anything when it comes to salvation. If you want to reach people, try reaching them with love and not just your point of view on truth. Have a nice day. 🙂
JessPH
@James Hart: Perhaps, pray to your “God” to make your brain functional.
NoCagada
@James Hart: ” They’ll use you, steal from you, cheat on you, and then, when something better comes along, kick you to the curb.”
Kind of sounds like Newt Gingrich…Mark Sanford…Donald Trump…Rudy Giuliani
delia
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Dirtybird_Mary
@James Hart:
Mr. Hart – How incredibly rude & misguided of you to make such astounding subjective statements, trying to pass them off as objective & credible. WHAT A HORSES ASS YOU ARE. It is you who is in denial, denial about yoke you have (& willing placed) around your neck. The ‘church’ doesn’t care about you or anything else, other than preserving itself. Talk about ‘can’t see the forest for the trees’ !
As if your some authority on what is or isn’t an”addiction” (nevermind the fact by the way, what you claim is contrary to what those who ARE qualified to speak on the matter say or believes).
• Plus! I just consulted Jesus on the matter & he agrees with me! (He stopped by to suck my dick! He’s always so frisky in the afternoon!)
Daggerman
…there is a point that needs to be made here. I find this kind of ‘awakening’ very refreshing because whoever undergoes a conversion has rightful goodness in their hearts and is more of a person than all the cowards that remain in the closet OR the ignorant ones who swear by the bible because their too scared to face reality.