Gay-Loving Heteros

Gavin Newsom Ensures Meg Whitman Showdown for California Governor

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And now it’s official: San Francisco mayor and homo lover hetero-person Gavin Newsom is running for governor of California! Because he’s all Web 2.0 cool, he made the announcement via Twitter (pictured: Newsom demonstrating his understanding of complex technology), though the Newsom for Governor Exploratory Committee has already been bandied about. So what’s a Newsom Golden State look like? Well he’ll probably overturn Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger’s veto and institute Harvey Milk Day (and encourage rampant sex in the streets!), green the economy (and drain profits from helpless oil companies!), increase spending on education (and force teachers to instruct students on anal sex!), extend an olive branch to illegal immigrants (and make them have gay sex with each other!), and provide more funds for health care (free HIV tests!). Or, at the very least, show opponent Meg Whitman the door.

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