German zookeepers are splitting up Guido and Detlef, a same-sex pair of vultures. So they’ll screw some chicks.
Officials at the Allwetter Zoo in Muenster are removing one of the vultures and sending him to a Czech zoo to mate with a female. And they’re brushing off any criticism by insisting the gay vultures made a lousy home: “The other vultures kept stealing the material they used for the nest,” says a zoo spokeswoman. A nest they’ve spent the last several months building together. (Both vultures are 14-years-old; vultures live to about 25 in the wild though sometimes 30 in captivity.)
And while we can debate whether non-humans are ever really “gay” (or just exhibit same-sex behavior) until the gay cows come home, who here would want to be ripped away from their partner and forced to breed with the opposite sex?
It’s unclear whether the zookeepers plan to return the vulture back to Germany after his forced copulation is complete.