Queerty is better as a member

Log in | Register
  saving lives

God Won’t Let You Take Rick Warren Away via Toxin

Thanks to the magic of prayer, Pastor Rick Warren’s eyes have been saved from a blindness-causing toxin! This will be a good knowledge nugget for Ted Haggard to file away in case he accidentally ingests kerosene.

 

[Gawker]

By:           John Rogers
On:           Jul 22, 2010
Tagged: , , ,

  • 15 Comments
    • ChrisH
      ChrisH

      What?

      Jul 22, 2010 at 7:30 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jeff K.
      Jeff K.

      Here’s to hoping that ‘toxin’ that got into his eyes was a well-placed bit of ejaculate from his secret boyfriend.

      Jul 22, 2010 at 8:01 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • hf2hvit
      hf2hvit

      I guess god chose him-just him because he’s SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO special…

      Jul 22, 2010 at 10:01 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • christopher di spirito
      christopher di spirito

      I’m sure Warren’s good friend, Melissa Ethridge immediately went to her kitchen to cook a pot of organic chicken soup for him. Then she flew down the 405 in the Mercedes to personally deliver the magic food liquid to her pal. All is better now in Hollywood.

      Jul 22, 2010 at 10:17 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • GEW
      GEW

      What about all the other Christian people suffering from various ailments and diseases ’round ‘Merica? How come god ain’t healin’ THEM?

      Oh yeah, ’cause they’re the lowly peons who financially support the leaders and god’s more interested in the leaders health so the peons don’t miss out on the important lessons and doctrine god wants the leaders to pass along… or sumptin’.

      Jul 23, 2010 at 12:08 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Hamburglar
      Hamburglar

      @christopher di spirito: I’d more suspect he was taking whatever it was that Jerry Falwell or Pat Robertson or whoever it was had a few years ago that he claimed gave him super strength.

      Jul 23, 2010 at 1:14 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Faketroll
      Faketroll

      “May god use this pain for his glory.” What a disgusting statement. It’s amazing that millions of sheeple refer to Christianity for moral instruction.

      Jul 23, 2010 at 1:43 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jeffree
      Jeffree

      Warren is deceptive in how he pretends to be inclusive but actually wants “us” to repent for our orientation.

      A-L-E-R-T….We must now all prepare for a 3,000 word essay from Cassandra explaining why we are wrong.
      i adore her–I hope she knows that–, and if I have to discuss scripture with a fundie, I want her on my side & I will gladly make her brunch.

      But once she gets started on atheism, there’s no way to stop her.

      Jul 23, 2010 at 2:15 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David
      David

      @Hamburglar: That was Pat Robertson. He broadcast a video of himself leg pressing 1000 lbs.
      Thing was, those leg press machines are angled at 45 degrees, so (much mumbo-jumbo deleted) it only takes an effort of half the load to move the weight. Also, he only moved the load about two inches.
      Anyone in his right mind would have been embarrassed by such idiocy. But he’s not in his right mind.

      Jul 23, 2010 at 3:28 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Rey
      Rey

      And yet, god won’t heal amputees. Why?

      Jul 23, 2010 at 5:11 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
      PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS

      <good to "see" these scumbags are getting their comeuppance

      Glen Beck has been diagnosed with a disease and could be blind within a year…….his followers are so blinded by his hatred there is some kind of poetic justice goin’ on there………

      Jul 23, 2010 at 9:55 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Hyhybt
      Hyhybt

      @PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS: Sad… but interesting, if paired with Rush Limbaugh’s deafness.

      Jul 23, 2010 at 4:05 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • B
      B

      In No. 7 ยท Faketroll wrote, “‘May god use this pain for his glory.’ What a disgusting statement.”

      The article attributed it to Romans 8:28, and an on-line check (wanted to see what the context was) returned the following as the actual quote: “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.”

      It’s not clear where “this pain for his glory” came from, but it doesn’t seem to be from that part of the Bible. To be fair, though, 2000 years ago, you didn’t have any effective medication for severe or chronic pain, so I guess they needed some sort of rationalization to make people feel better about it.

      Jul 23, 2010 at 7:40 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • meet the new boss
      meet the new boss

      Hey God, next time aim for his vocal chords.

      Jul 24, 2010 at 5:49 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jeffree
      Jeffree

      Is gluttony no longer a sin? Maggie Srivistav Gallagher & Rick Warren have some ‘splainin’ to do about why they’re obese………

      Jul 26, 2010 at 8:47 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

    Add your Comment

    Please log in to add your comment

    Need an account? Register It's free and easy.



  • POPULAR ON QUEERTY

    FOLLOW US
     



    GET QUEERTY'S DAILY NEWSLETTER


    FROM AROUND THE WEB

    !-- Sailthru Horizon -->
    Copyright 2014 Queerty, Inc.
    Follow Queerty at Queerty.com, twitter.com/queerty and facebook.com/queerty.