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GOP Death Watch

GOP Presidential Wannabes Want to Bring Back the ‘90s—the 1690s

We’ve already reported that five out the Seven GOP presidential hopefuls opposed marriage equality at the New Hampshire debate Monday night, yet another astonishing exercise in right-wing group think. But that was just the start of the wallowing in nostalgia for the good old days when gays could be thrown out of the military at will and otherwise have the force of the federal government used to keep them in hairdressing salons and rugby matches where they belong.

In a two-hour session that only needed Baywatch references to complete the time-warp effect, most of the would-be leaders of the free world described the various ways they would curtail freedom for gays and lesbians at home. Five of the seven would reinstate Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell. Former Senator Rick Santorum, whose name has lent itself to things gay that probably make him break out in a cold sweat, said that commanders should be able to rely on “discipline in place that punishes ‘bad behavior.’” (Yes, we know, you saw that movie.) Joining Santorum in supporting reinstating the vicious policy, which military commanders agree should be repealed, were Rep. Michelle Bachman, ex-Rep. Newt (I don’t need no stinkin’ staff) Gingrich, ex-Gov. Tim Pawlenty and ex-Gov Mitt Romney (aka, the Human Eggo).

As for the aforementioned gay marriage, two candidates—libertarian Ron Paul and former Godfather Pizza CEO Herman Cain—went all Cheney and said that the matter should be left to the states. Four candidates called for a federal amendment banning gay marriage altogether. Rep. Michelle Bachman, the Tea Party darling who seems to be both politically savvy and nutso all at once, took both sides. Her confusion seem to be caused by a conflict between her principles—states should be able to do whatever they want—and her gut, which is reflexively antigay. In the end her gut won out.

photo via

 

By:           John Gallagher
On:           Jun 14, 2011
Tagged: , , , , , , , , ,
  • 22 Comments
    • JordanMeehan
      JordanMeehan

      This. Yes.

      Jun 14, 2011 at 8:56 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • christopher di spirito
      christopher di spirito

      Did the nitwits at GOProud weigh in yet on last night’s circus?

      Jun 14, 2011 at 9:48 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Shannon1981
      Shannon1981

      @christopher di spirito: They are, and will remain, quiet.

      Jun 14, 2011 at 10:08 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • AlanReeser
      AlanReeser

      None of them had any plans for the future, other than repealing the Obama healthcare plan.

      Jun 14, 2011 at 10:15 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Mac McNeill
      Mac McNeill

      @AlanReeser: Of course they want to repeal Obamacare. It would mean that the doctors couldn’t charge you two left nuts for service. The republicans only look out for republicans and how they can make more money. I’m surprised that the main talk last night wasn’t on more cuts for the rich, but that the secret weapon that’s coming. And of course they’re against all things gay unless they get caught tapping their foot in the bathroom stalls at the airport then they’re just trying to wake the foot up.

      Jun 14, 2011 at 11:29 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Gorbeh
      Gorbeh

      Troglodyte debate

      Jun 15, 2011 at 12:40 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Johnny Q Doe
      Johnny Q Doe

      From GOProud:

      “GOProud, the only national organization representing gay conservatives and their allies, was encouraged by what was said by the hopefuls on stage. “The seven Presidential candidates on stage last night excelled at talking about the issues average Americans, and indeed average gay people, care most about,” said Jimmy LaSalvia, Executive Director. “From the economy, to taxes, to retirement security, to healthcare, to the role of government, the Republican hopefuls offered a clear and compelling contrast to the failed policies of the Obama administration,” continued LaSalvia. “The truth is that President Obama’s radically left-wing policies have been bad for gay Americans and, indeed, for all Americans. GOProud’s number one mission between now and November of 2012 continues to be the defeat of Barack Obama,” concluded LaSalvia.”

      Jun 15, 2011 at 2:13 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jem
      Jem

      Ron Paul didn’t say it should be a state decision. He said it should be a church decision.

      Jun 15, 2011 at 2:26 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jperon
      Jperon

      Keep in mind that CNN manipulated the rules to keep out a pro-gay rights candidates like Gov. Gary Johnson, while inviting people who aren’t even running. Shame on CNN.

      Jun 15, 2011 at 3:40 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Shannon1981
      Shannon1981

      @Johnny Q Doe: I stand corrected. Anything they have to say on social issues?

      I can’t stomach them enough to go to their website.

      Jun 15, 2011 at 5:14 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • ThatRandomGuy
      ThatRandomGuy

      @Gorbeh: That was a vocab word in my ap english class this week… just saying. carry on. =]

      Jun 15, 2011 at 5:36 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Right Wingers Are Socioptahs (John From England)
      Right Wingers Are Socioptahs (John From England)

      @Jperon:

      But they also kept out that right wing Reagan loving gay candidate..

      It’s not a conspiracy. It’s just the people the most likely to actually win. By your logic, they should or could invite everyone to come on the podium. It doesn’t work like that.

      Sorry.

      Jun 15, 2011 at 6:16 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Right Wingers Are Socioptahs (John From England)
      Right Wingers Are Socioptahs (John From England)

      @Johnny Q Doe:

      Er yes. They are consistent. And then what?

      This is the biggest problem with left wing gays. You keep on thinking-stupidly-that GOproud or other nasty right wing big its will get enlightened and choose humanity over capitalism. They wont. Get over it. Which bit of low cognitive dissonance when dealing with the right don’t you get?

      They aren’t wired that way. Sheez.

      This is why so many people be it Katie Perry or Tracy Morgan can pull the wool over your incredibly gullible eyes by saying pro gay right stuff.

      Sometimes I think the left need a good hard lesson in cynicism and reality.

      Jun 15, 2011 at 6:21 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • jon
      jon

      DADT tell again? What about out troops? WTF are they supposed to do? Just say “JK guys, im all str8 now.” My military buddies don’t care either way since it doesnt matter to them, just they don’t want it flopping every which way.

      Jun 15, 2011 at 7:37 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Queer Supremacist - Gay Votes For Gay Candidates
      Queer Supremacist - Gay Votes For Gay Candidates

      No surprise GOProud dodged the issue. They were founded by ex-Log Cabin Republicans bothered by that group’s integrity in standing up to Bush over the FMA.

      @Jperon: They don’t have Fred Karger or Gary Johnson on unless it makes the GOP look bad. If it also makes Obama look bad, they shy away.

      Looks like I’ll be writing in Fred Karger in 2012. I will never waste another vote on a heterosexual again.

      Jun 15, 2011 at 11:07 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Queer Supremacist - Gay Votes For Gay Candidates
      Queer Supremacist - Gay Votes For Gay Candidates

      @Right Wingers Are Socioptahs (John From England): Sometimes I think the left need a good hard lesson in cynicism and reality.

      But then they wouldn’t be leftists anymore.

      Jun 15, 2011 at 11:08 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Are human beings inherently sociopathic? (John from England)
      Are human beings inherently sociopathic? (John from England)

      @Queer Supremacist – Gay Votes For Gay Candidates:

      Ha! Well I know many lefties agree with you but I consider myself left and realising I was serving my ego instead of actually helping productively in the long-term the people whose causes I supported, got me to wake up.

      The left goes round and round in the circles. Boy can they talk! But strategy? Nah. We’d rather argue and argue even if we aren’t helping anyone!

      Case in point all the failed Marriage Equality campaigns from California to what happened to the IOWA judges.

      And with NY, why did it take them THIS long to realise this is what they had to do? What NOM has been doing these past few years against gay marriage?

      Jun 15, 2011 at 11:26 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Mike In London UK
      Mike In London UK

      Am I right where I’ve heard that 6 of the 9 potentials (sounds like buffy applicants) want to bring back Creationism as a “taught like science” in the classroom?

      Including Michelle Bachman?

      Jun 15, 2011 at 2:06 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • PopSnap
      PopSnap

      I wish Ron Paul would win the nomination (fat chance, though). Being a moderate/liberal, I may not agree with the guy’s political stances, but he is incredibly consistent and actually intelligent, unlike basically everyone else on that stage.

      Doesn’t matter, anyways. I seriously doubt Romney, who will 95% get the nomation, would win.

      Jun 15, 2011 at 3:01 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • james_from_cambridge
      james_from_cambridge

      @PopSnap: Romney is dangerous because he’s probably the only one that can win on their side. They’re all nutjobs except for Romney and if he somehow gets the nomination, the great squishy middle-of-the-road voters that decide elections are gonna be very comfortable with him because he’s as malleable and empty-headed as they are. Then we’d be stuck with a Republican White House, House and Senate (since the Democrats have twice as many seats up for Senate next time and everyone and their mother thinks that even if Obama wins, the Dems will lose the Senate.)

      Even my Obama-loving mother who will choke you if you badmouth him in any way says to me that “it wouldn’t be so bad if Romeny wins-he’s not as bad as the rest of them” and “he’s really handsome. He’d make a good President.” Seriously. Every old lady who votes Democrat is gonna pull the lever for that ken-doll looking cunt and with both Houses gone as well, we gays are gonna find out what it means to be fucked but good, only we won’t enjoy it (unless you’re into being beat up and shit on like the Goproud sluts.)

      Jun 15, 2011 at 4:04 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Queer Supremacist
      Queer Supremacist

      @Are human beings inherently sociopathic? (John from England): Ha! Well I know many lefties agree with you but I consider myself left and realising I was serving my ego instead of actually helping productively in the long-term the people whose causes I supported, got me to wake up.

      The left goes round and round in the circles. Boy can they talk! But strategy? Nah. We’d rather argue and argue even if we aren’t helping anyone!

      Judean People’s Frunt or People’s Front of Judea?

      Seriously, a Mormon in the White House means at least two more Israeli citizens in the near future.

      Jun 15, 2011 at 4:42 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Queer Supremacist
      Queer Supremacist

      @Are human beings inherently sociopathic? (John from England): Ha! Well I know many lefties agree with you but I consider myself left and realising I was serving my ego instead of actually helping productively in the long-term the people whose causes I supported, got me to wake up.

      The left goes round and round in the circles. Boy can they talk! But strategy? Nah. We’d rather argue and argue even if we aren’t helping anyone!

      Judean People’s Front or People’s Front of Judea?

      Seriously, a Mormon in the White House means at least two more Israeli citizens in the near future.

      Jun 15, 2011 at 4:43 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

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