Queerty is better as a member
Very encouraging words. Living unapologetically is a wonderful way to keep from becoming addicted to other people’s approval.
@Charlie in Charge: Couldn’t agree more; and I would suspect not choosing a “closet!”
What a great story and a great dad.
What a great Dad. Very few young people appreciate their parents completely when were young My father had similar advice for me when I was young. I didn’t come out for many years later, but as I suspected, he said he already knew, but didn’t like it. I always figured dad would disown me and mom would be oaky. Couldn’t have been more opposite. Mom wanted me out of the house immediately but dad was on my side. I didn’t speak to my mom for over a year. Fortunately, they both came around were had the best relationship one could hope for. I was with them both when they died.
And look at the number of anti-gay zealots who try to convince people that boys become gay because they lack fathers, have fathers who fail to show interest in them, or have fathers who are weak. This situation truly shows that boys with strong, responsible, caring and understanding fathers can be gay too – because fathers and mothers do NOT turn their children gay.
So many of these Story Corps recordings wring the tears out of me. This was definitely one. I love that a young dairy queen’s father knew how to tell his son to live with honesty and pride.
I also grew up in a small town and when I was in 7th Grade I went to school in drag for Halloween. I didn’t know what drag was, it’s just that I had forgotten to ask my mom for a costume, so I put on her wig and a party dress that had broken beading around the neck, but I fixed it. I knew how to do the makeup and nail polish, I had practiced many times in the afternoon when I was the only one home. And her shoes fit me perfectly.
We checked in at our homeroom (25 kids in my class) and then went to the gym to play broom hockey. I kicked off the heels, took off the pantyhose I was wearing, and grabbed a broom. One of the teachers said, “Ma’am, this is for the kids,” and I replied, “I’m Steve, I’m in Mr. Simpson’s class!” as I ran to join the game.
My mom was called and pulled me out of school. She was furious and I didn’t know why, and she couldn’t explain why. I was crying and wrecked my makeup, but managed to say, “I fixed the beads on the dress.” I just remember her reaching over and fingering the neckline, saying, “Oh.”
@Charlie in Charge: You have a wise way with words. I still have friends who — even though they’re completely out of the closet — live in “appeasement mode.” Somewhere in their head the question constantly echos: “What will people think?” I’ve come to realize it’s a form of self-oppression. I try to always let them know that when they’re through self-flagellating, they can join the fun.
Good for him, but my parents’ opinion never mattered to me. I’ve never even felt obligated to come out although I don’t act “girlish”. I’m not sure if they both accepted it or not, but I’m sure they noticed I didn’t care what they thought of me.
He’s not just the patron saint of “dads for sissies,” he’s should be the patron saint of dads period.
What an awesome story and an INCREDIBLY wicked and wondeful dad! Totally warmed my heart and put a smile on my face! *THUMBSUP*
That is a wounded story, and his dad was before his time, in his time with his thinking, and acceptance of his son. But I wonder if the son ever came around as a young man to not be ashamed of what his dad did for a living or his work attire??
I had a pretty difference experience. My Mom (divorced) was a cubscout den mother in 1965 in a middle sized city in Michigan. Each den was responsible for putting on a show for the whole group (packs). My mom came up for the idea of us doing a fashion show in women’s clothing. I don’t recall feeling bad or nervous about it at all. The audience, numbering around 100 people almost burst their sides with laughter. We were the hit of the show and took home first prize. Looking back, I wonder how that happened in that era. Can you imagine the outrage something like that would stir up now?
What an intelligent, understanding father. Back in the ’50s I lived in Boise, Idaho and people did not know much about gays and the Newspaper created a story that was scary. It said that there were homosexuals hiding in the bushes in the park and they were attacking and seducing young teenage boys. Gays were persecuted and some sent to prison, check out “The Fall of ’55″ video. The real story is that the high school jocks were taught to hustle by a teenager in a family that had moved to Boise from Chicago. They were told they could make some money and have some fun at the same time. Even though I knew I liked boys, I would never hustle or hide in the bushes.
My point is that if my father were as understanding as this guy’s father was, I would have not been so afraid of who I was.
Wow. Beautiful story.
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