Christmas can be one of the most unbearable times of the year, what with the holiday shopping, forced family gatherings and nightmares of your bank balance dipping into dangerously low digits. But we gays essentially rule the holidays—we have the best costumes on Halloween, the best parties during Thanksgiving, and don’t even get me started on Pride.
So how do we spice up Christmas, the least gayest holiday of them all? With music, of course! Isn’t this the holiday that makes spirits “gay” or something like that?
Snuggle up with a warm cup of cocoa and crank up the volume! We’re bringing you some of the gayest holiday covers of all time:
Cheyenne Jackson – “Squeeze Me It’s Christmas”
Before he became an amateur adult film star, Cheyenne Jackson wrote an adorable (and original) holiday song before Christmas last year. Penned with his best friend and musical director Ben Toth, “Squeeze Me It’s Christmas” is about celebrating the season with the ones you love—”squeeze me, please me, don’t tease me…” sounds about right.
Clay Aiken – “O Holy Night”
As one of the few professional homosexuals with a solo album dedicated to the birth of Christ, we can safely say that nobody does “O Holy Night” quite like Clay Aiken. Above, watch a collection of clips of Clay Aiken performing his holiday tunes in the years before he came out, then kick yourself for not realizing Clay Aiken was gay before 2008. This video is all the proof we needed.
Elton John – “Step Into Christmas”
Believe it or not, the video above is actually billed as the “official” video for Elton John’s “Step Into Christmas.” Isn’t nostalgia fun? The 1973 single went on to top the Billboard Christmas Singles chart and inspired the tradition of gay men celebrating Christmas at homoerotic dance parties in heels and boas.
Oh, you don’t do that too? Well. Nevermind then.
Mary Lambert – “Auld Lang Syne/Just Got Home”
The female powerhouse featured on Macklemore & Ryan Lewis’ “Same Love” dropped her debut album this week and sang a few acoustic holiday hits for One Mic One Take. Check out her take on the traditional New Year’s Eve anthem above.
Liberace – “Christmas Medley”
In one of his final appearances before death, Liberace performed an original Christmas medley during a live broadcast of his televised holiday special in the early ’80s. Careful not to be blinded by the melange of expensive jewels decorating his hands — the father of flamboyance may have chosen a rather tame suit for this gig, but homegirl did not skimp on the hand jewels.
Jonathan Groff and Lea Michele – “I’ll Be Home for Christmas”
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, this actually happened. During the holiday season in 2008, a Hand reached down from Heaven and brought out actor Jonathan Groff, Lea Michele and the rest of the Spring Awakening cast together for an intimate holiday concert at Joe’s Pub in New York City. Enjoy the bootleg proof above, as narrated by the excitable gay man filming it.
Chris Colfer and Darren Criss – “White Christmas”
Glee came to New York City for Christmas this year, where the show’s power gays met for a quick skate and a rousing rendition of “White Christmas” on the ice. The video marks another unfortunate missed opportunity for Fox to feature a gay kiss, but at least it’ll fill you with holiday cheer!