Set the clock back 30 years, and many of the ignorant questions transgender people face were being asked of gay people:
“When did you decide to be trans?”
“How do you have sex?”
And many more, as the below video details, are unique annoyances the trans community faces every day:
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
“Have you had the op?”
“Which bathroom do you use?”
Ignorance doesn’t necessarily reflect bad intentions, but a refusal to educate ourselves on experiences outside of our own does no good for anyone.
Here’s yet another opportunity to learn a little something about how to respectfully engage with people, trans or otherwise:
Clark35
None of these questions are off limits or “offensive” to trans people.
But I’m sure the professional victim PC trans crowd will claim they are.
ingyaom
These all seem like good questions to me, so why aren’t we allowed to ask them?
tootsieroll
They’re in appropriate questions because most of them reduce the person down to nothing more than their body parts/ genitals. How would you feel if some stranger came up and asking you invasive questions about your anatomy?
Bauhaus
@ingyaom:
“These all seem like good questions to me, so why aren’t we allowed to ask them?”
You are allowed to ask them. Don’t be surprised if the answer is: a dirty look, an eye roll, a turned back, or a simple, ‘go fuck yourself!’
EdWoody
You say we should educate ourselves, and in the same breath tell us off for asking questions. Which is it? And if we are going to ask questions in order to educate ourselves, who better to ask than the people who are actually living the answers?
Avery Alvarez
@EdWoody: I tend to agree with you.
I feel as though, if you’re part of a minority, you can’t depend on anyone else to educate the pubic on your issues but you yourself.
The enemies of equality would sure love the opportunity to miseducate the public with hate, fear and lies. Why give them the chance?
So therein lies the problem; if you don’t want to educate the public, but also get angry when people buy into right wing conspiracy theories or false and offensive stereotypes, what do you expect the public to do? Some might say “the internet”, but remember there is both good and true information out there, and bad and false info.
Clark35
@tootsieroll: Typical PC answer from someone who does not live in reality. Personally if someone did that to me I would find it funny and amusing.
Bauhaus
@Clark35:
You’d find someone defecating on your face funny and amusing.
McShane
The lady with the teal ponytails seems like fun.
@Clark35: Can I feel your boobs? -__-
Clark35
@Bauhaus: Nope I would not; but we all know you’re a scat queen. 😉
Paco
@EdWoody: There is a thing called the Internet. It contains resources and information for Trans individuals, that can also be read by anyone wishing to educate themselves about the topic. So it really is possible to educate yourself without having to ask inappropriate questions.
barkomatic
When I was in college and openly gay, I went on speaking engagements throughout the school where I was asked questions similar to these. As long as the question was asked in a respectful manner (and most of the time they were) then I was not offended and I usually answered. Everyone on the panel had the choice not to answer a question of course.
I respect individual trans people greatly–but I don’t agree with the abrasive and arrogant manner in which some in the trans movement deal with the public.
Clark35
@barkomatic: Exactly they’re way too PC, are mollycoddled, don’t live in reality, and you have Trans people who want to claim that they’re LOL “cis” or biologically and genetically the gender that they’re not and then they get mad when someone does not recognize them as being trans.
David Bolton
Yes, treat them like precious little delicate eggs who can crack at the slightest question about their lives. Only ask about the weather, their plans for the weekend (on second thought, don’t ask that), and… yes, just stick with the weather question. And don’t say anything else because it might be offensive.
David Bolton
@Tootsie: Prying questions can be a great way to teach someone via example that you aren’t that different than they are. And to me
It also can indicate they’re at least trying to educate themselves about you and the way you live your life, which is a far sight better than “I don’t want to hear about that!”
I used to have a boss who would ask me all kinds of ridiculous questions about gay sex and it was hilarious usually, because it showed exactly how naive he was. He freely admitted that I was the person who made him realize gay people weren’t the stereotype he had been brought up to think they were.
jason smeds
Trans people have deep personality issues that don’t end with wearing their hair long or putting on make-up. These issues extend well beyond their “transformation”. Let’s not fall for this propaganda that being trans is linked to homosexuality.
Trans people do NOT want to be thought of as homosexual, and are often homophobic.
David Bolton
It’s brave of you to admit being a trans person, Jason… what with those deep personality issues and all.
Giancarlo85
@jason smeds: Jason smeds has deep personality issues including narcissistic personality disorder. Jason hates women, hates trans people and sounds like a gay Rush Limbaugh. There are quite a few trans people that are gay by the way. Learn the facts.
@Clark35: Repeat that nonsense about PC this, PC that… and you’ll sound like you belong on fox news.
Trans people deserve the same respect as others. People on here lambasting them sound like right wing assholes (how that’s political correctness for you, bigots?). All some do on here is about harping on about political correctness… just a way for a stupid ignorant bigot to justify their narrowminded hatred. You call others PC to make yourself feel better.
And I can’t believe this… certain gay people using the same kind of hatred that is thrown at gay people, and directing it at trans people. Then these blockheads claim that trans people have nothing to do with the LGBTQQI movement. What gives you a right to judge other people? Gay people get judged all the time, so doesn’t that make you a mindless hypocrite?
Giancarlo85
@Clark35: It’s funny when a bigot claims he lives in reality. Same old stupid bullshit I hear on Fox News… narrow minded American exceptionalist homophobic transphobic bullshit (how is that for political correctness?).
Why don’t some of you form a church cult that protests against trans people and says they are going to hell? Your brain level activity is about as low as those people.
Jacob23
Talking with trans people is like thermonuclear war. The only way to win is not to play. Whatever you say, no matter what it is and what your intentions are, it will offend them. Because they thrive on being offended. It gives them permission to externalize their rage. And they enjoy the power that comes with being a moral judge over others. So they will look for any opportunity to be offended. If you don’t provide it, they will invent it. If you abide by all of their “trans etiquette” rules, they will invent new rules or change the old rules.
If you find yourself caught in a trans attack, whatever you do, don’t apologize. Listening to you grovel will only add to their pleasure and mark you as an attractive target for more abuse. LGBs are already their preferred victims, so don’t add to it by satisfying their sadistic drive.
Clay83
What a ridiculous article, I am sure as gay men we have been asked by men and woman who are interested in finding out about gay people, the questions they ask may sound stupid but majority of the time it is just trying to understand how things work in the simplest of terms. As long as the questions are being asked to understand and not to provoke or embarrass, help to educate those not in the know.
sectbrawn
Can we ask them how to play the role of professional victim since they do it so well? Or is that off limits too?
Giancarlo85
@Clay83: The questions? These questions directed at trans people aren’t about educating anyone. They are about ignorance and disdain.
@Jacob23: Coming from the guy that is full of violent anger even towards out feminine gay men, that is ironic you say any of that. You get really angry and offended when you see a feminine and out gay men because you think he is misrepresenting you. We have already gone through this in the past. You are a massive hypocrite.
And now you bash on trans people… This is pretty common for someone like you to do. You hate it when people don’t live to cultural norms. You have adopted multiple cultural and gender norms, so you attack anyone that doesn’t conform.
Sadistic drive huh? Maybe someone should ask you how nasty you get towards other gay men on here? Your hypocrisy is evident and everyone can see it miles away.
jason smeds
Trans people want to fit in, not stand out. You can see it in the fact that a male-to-female “transformation” is often accompanied by the most stereotypical elements of a woman’s appearance, such as long hair and make-up. Talk about conservative….
Transgenderism is a personality issue that needs to be treated as such. It really is not about sexuality as much as it is about personality.
john
If at this point, in the age of the internet and search engines you still need to ask those questions then the rest of the world must assume that your intentions are to demean or be offensive!!! Unless you are an infant or a person of diminished mental capacity there is absolutely no need to ask anyone anything that pertains to sexuality or sexual identity or anything else regarding the such! Go on the internet and ask away….information is free and easily accessible. Reading is a basic skill.
Oh or maybe if you live in a part of the world that is still developing and basically have no access to the industrial world??? At which point you wouldn’t be on this website or in social settings where you would interact with other people.
Troglodytes always claim others are too sensitive when called out on their apathetic ignorance and inability to recognize their own lack of intellect!
Giancarlo85
@jason smeds: Are you still going on your inane rants? You are the one with personality issues. Get your head checked out, kid. By the way, trans people are not conformists. You are a conformist. Now go get a clue.
Clark35
@Jacob23: Very true.
Giancarlo85
@Clark35: Good republican parrot! Have anyone else you want to parrot today?
Rosiescrot
Oh my god Fox looks amazing!! I saw some of his transition on My Transexual Summer that aired here in Australia last year, I guess we got it late! Wow!! You look amazing man!
Transvt
@Clark35: These all fall under the “What the f**k is it to you, anyways” category. As in, why the hell do you need to know intimate details about my life that affect you in absolutely no way, shape or form whatsoever?
Transvt
@ingyaom: Because why the hell are they any of your business? Why should you care about if I’ve had surgery, or how I have sex, or what I used to look like? It’s private stuff. You don’t need to know, you don’t need to ask
Transvt
@EdWoody: Why the hell do you need to know about how I have sex? Or if I’ve had surgery or not? You can be curious. But don’t be downright invasive, unless you want me to explain my sex life in every dirty detail
Transvt
@jason smeds: What the hell are you talking about, homophobic?
Transvt
I guess I’m going to be the first to say it, if you ask me how I have sex, I am going to describe it to you in incredibly graphic detail, right down to the sweaty secrets