Nuff said.

“If you knew the guy on the other side of the gloryhole had AIDS, would you still have sex with him because you’re wearing a condom? ”

Of course, my answer was HELL NO !. Then he asked me “how do you know he doesn’t have it?”

gulp.

You did not need and should not have been given the medications. 10 seconds in and out does not represent risky sex that could have infected you with HIV.

Taking the drugs when you dont need them is dangerous, it could leave you with a possible resistance to that set of drugs if god forbid you ever did need anti-retrovirals.

Not only did you put yourself through worthless worry, but by sharing this part of your story, you are, as Tim mentioned, contributing to a climate of not just fear but of absolute petrification when gay people have sex.

You ask if the venue itself heightened the risk, well compare the risks of having sex in a sex club; STD’s and yes a possible contraction of HIV, not from something like you experienced but from proper bareback sex, the type that the gay porn and sex industry is finding so lucrative

comparing that with the other places to seek sexual encounters, parks late at night, cruising areas, truckstops, public toilets, where you not only run that risk of STD’s or HIV, but you are leaving yourself totally open to muggings, arrest, assault, sexual assault, rape, or even murder.

Why any person seeking immediate, anonymous sex with another man would go anywhere other than a licensed, safe, clean gay sauna or sex club, with lube, condoms, showers and safer sex information available is beyond me. Yes you are risking your sexual health, a risk that you can to a large extent control, but compare that with risking your very life anywhere else.

I just did a quick search of Minn. on the Damron guide and it looks like it has it’s share of Bars, Clubs, Cruisy areas, etc… It looks like there could be lots of people there having one nighters, not to mention the people that travel for vacations etc….

Minneapolis
Bars (10)
Nightclubs (7)
Cafes (10)
Cruisy Areas (2)

St. Paul
Bars 2
Nightclubs 1

Rochester
Cruisy Areas 1

Moorehead
Nightclubs 1

Mankato
Adult Bookstore 1

Duluth
Bookstores (1)
Men’s Clubs (1)
Erotica (1)

Bemidji
Cruisy Areas (2)

Well, I’d ponder more, but I’m certain that many of you need to get out there and fuck as many guys as you can without a condom, so have at it, because absolutely nothing will happen to you!

HIV is spread 2 ways, blood and semen. If you had no open cuts on your dick, you didn’t have some guy bleeding your dick or rubbing semen on it, there was almost no risk.

I know your argument was there was you want 0% risk… but if you know anything about statistics 0.00001 is still 0.

Most people who do get infected have a number of other factors like an STD, not enough lube that causes abrasions, drug use that leads to long fucking. Without him bleeding on you AND you having some sort of sore or cut that he would have to get ALOT of blood into, you aren’t going to get infected.

However, most guys don’t know about this because we’ve had a generation of AIDS scaring the shit out of anybody to do anything without a condom, and now there is a condom backlash and we wonder why…

I fail to see why the conversation went beyond “I believe I may have been exposed to HIV and I want to take any available prophylactic medications.” Is it really any of her business how it happened? I highly doubt she even asked, but if she did, I’m even more puzzled as to why you would feel compelled to give the whole story about how some bathhouse queen sat on your dick, unbeknownst to you.

Is it possible you volunteered a bunch of information about the situation in order to separate yourself from people who are exposed to HIV through intentional butt sex? Or is it possible you were just nervous as hell and let your mouth run?

Just curious. How old are you, anyway?

I wish we could all get over this fear of honest communicating… yes it may not always end in a lay but it will in the long save more lives.

Physicians recommend 3-6 mos. wrapped with a monogamous partner before considering unprotected sex. it can take awhile to test positive after contracting the hivvy, especially with the rapid test that most use today.

One can only surmise that gay men are just as hypocritical as straight men. We really aren’t that much different from them.

Are you suggesting that your “rampant promiscuity” reduced HIV transmission?

No judgements. No rules, even.

For me, it’s been a rough road at times as I’ve begun to question “What am i willing to risk in order to scratch the itch?”

For awhile, I wasn’t even that aware of things like consequences or risks or addictive/compulsive behavior…

“Do what you want — with no restrictions!”

(Who wants restrictions?)

But when things began to crash (literally), it was either “find someone to blame” or “find a way to shrug it off” or…. “Wake up!” — or (even worse) “Take responsibility for my own life”…

For some people, it’s all about “celebration”– especially after dealing with a lifetime of repression and oppression.

And for some others, it eventually has to become about “recovery”— because the “Celebration” turned out to be “Fool’s Gold”…

And even worse, the gold turned out to be poison.

Good luck to you–

or as Charles Dickens put it,

“God bless us, everyone!”

safer how? if you add up the numbers, say you fool around with one guy, then that guy fooled around with 3 guys, and who did they fool around with? it brings the “when you sleep with some one, you sleep with who ever they slept with” into one night.

granted every one knows the risk when they go, but i’d say the chances of getting something (clap/syph/etc) from one guy you take home from the bar is far less then at the sex club.

I’ve also had some dude try to sit on me (without asking or intimating) and I was like “whoa, what r u doing.” Freaked me out.

In regards to the crapping thing: Dude, you know they make incontinence undergarments right? They make them so they look just like underwear now. I know you might find it embarrassing to shop for them but as a former pharmacy employee we’ve heard it all and no request for anything we sell is shocking. If you’re still embarrassed, just say you’re buying them for your grandfather.

I think most people are more likely to have unprotected sex with their partners/long term relationships because they trust them. Whereas a hook up isn’t likely to be trusted at all and therefore people are more likely to be cautious.

Oh please Judge Judy. You sound just like some church lady protesting with Fred Phelps. People fuck up…all people. If you can’t have sympathy for that, then you must not be a very good friend.

Sex clubs shuld be a place where somone is especialy aware. I had sex in clubs rampantly during the first decades of Aids and never got anything. not even crabs.