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How The Gays See Europe

THE SHOT — Alas this “Europe According to Gay Men” map doesn’t differentiate between Italy and Sicily, missing an opportunity to separate “straight homos” from “straight homos willing to try anything once.” You guess which is which. [via]

By:           Ryan Tedder
On:           Sep 23, 2010
Tagged: , , ,

  • 27 Comments
    • CHIP1218
      CHIP1218

      A few suggested changes:

      1) Change Slovakia from “Military Porn” to “Bel Ami”

      2) Change Czech Republic from “Posh Beer” to “Twincest Porn” or “Twink Porn” or “Gay for Pay”

      3) Change Hungary from “Non-Military Porn” to “Triplet Porn”

      4) Change Ireland from “In Denial” to “Under 6 Inches”

      Sep 23, 2010 at 1:54 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Dimi
      Dimi

      Very funny. But what is F.H.S.o.M? I like the other maps as well.

      Sep 23, 2010 at 2:46 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • CHIP1218
      CHIP1218

      @Dimi:

      It’s some of the regions that wealthy Europeans like to go on “holiday” (vaction) – Portugal, the Spanish Islands (i.e. Ibiza), Sardinia, Slovenia, Croatia, and Greece – all countries known for their coastlines.

      Queerty, why was my post blocked??? I suggested renaming Czech Republic to Twinks/Incest Porn, Slovakia to Bel Ami, Hungary to Triplet Porn and Ireland to Under 6 Inches. How is that spam or a violation of the comment policy???

      Sep 23, 2010 at 2:51 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • CHIP1218
      CHIP1218

      @Dimi:

      @Dimi:

      It’s some of the regions that wealthy Europeans like to go on “holiday” (vaction) – Portugal, the Spanish Islands (i.e. Ibiza), Sardinia, Slovenia, Croatia, and Greece – all countries known for their coastlines.

      Queerty, why were my posts blocked????

      Sep 23, 2010 at 2:52 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • tavdy79
      tavdy79

      @Dimi: FHSoM = Federated Holiday States of the Mediterranean (Portugal, Balearics, Sardinia, Croatia, Greece, Cyprus & Israel).

      Sep 23, 2010 at 3:36 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Steve
      Steve

      @CHIP1218:
      Some destinations like Ibiza are known as pure party locations. Cheap and for young people who just want to get drunk. Nothing wealthy about it.

      Sep 23, 2010 at 4:29 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jane
      Jane

      I wish I could read what the dots at Berlin, Paris, London and Barcelona say.

      Sep 23, 2010 at 4:30 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Dimi
      Dimi

      @Jane: Paris says Mall, I think Berlin say Arm Wrestling, Barcelona is Barcelona but London I can’t make out.

      Sep 23, 2010 at 5:23 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Aquilo
      Aquilo

      Hmm.. not liking that my native Norway gets the label “Gently boring”… but then I suppose it’s not so far from the truth either..

      Sep 23, 2010 at 5:39 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • jason
      jason

      The Germans are awfully fetishistic. It’s as if they were born with implements in their asses.

      Sep 23, 2010 at 5:48 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Joey
      Joey

      @jason: Their culture is still…recovering. Hence outrageous fetishes and industrial music.

      Kind of like Japan and their strange fixation on the “cuteness” subculture (see Pokemon and Hello Kitty).

      Sep 23, 2010 at 6:11 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Alex Sarmiento
      Alex Sarmiento

      Portugal is NOT located on the Mediterranean. It’s on the fucking Atlantic Ocean.

      And why the hell aren’t Slovenia and Luxembourg and Andorra labeled?

      And the Balearic Islands are NOT an independent country. They’re an integral part of Spain.

      Sep 23, 2010 at 6:42 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Dimi
      Dimi

      @Alex Sarmiento: Portugal is not part of the Mediterranean Sea but it is considered to be part of the Mediterranean climate and biosphere.

      Sep 23, 2010 at 9:59 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Bernie
      Bernie

      I wish I could see what was written on Belgium and the Netherlands! Oh to have a sharper picture :)

      Sep 24, 2010 at 6:13 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Joseph
      Joseph

      Ireland ‘in denial’ is classic concidering that Ireland is a really gay-friendly country.
      This map only makes gay people look stupid.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 8:46 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Mark
      Mark

      @Joey

      Our culture is recovering, yours is stoll developing…
      Bullshit.

      I’d love to be in denial with some hot irish guy.
      Maybe Michael Fassbender.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 11:49 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Mark
      Mark

      @Joey

      Our culture is recovering, yours is still developing…
      Bullshit.

      I’d love to be in denial with some hot irish guy.
      Maybe Michael Fassbender.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 11:49 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Toby
      Toby

      @jason:

      LOL yeah, German porn can turn on you real quick. One minute it’s hot…the next everyone is wearing gas masks…

      Sep 24, 2010 at 2:23 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David K
      David K

      There’s a lot of whining about a comedy jpeg on the internet here on queerty today.

      @Toby: For some of us, it doesn’t get hot until the gasmasks go on ;-)

      Sep 24, 2010 at 3:48 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Alex Sarmiento
      Alex Sarmiento

      @Dimi: Oh, I see. :-)

      Sep 24, 2010 at 6:23 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Gunder
      Gunder

      @Dimi:
      You’re NOT right!: The entire northern half of Portugal is Atlantic climate, biosphere and culture. Learn before teaching others!

      Sep 25, 2010 at 1:44 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • declanto
      declanto

      @Gunder: Get your head out of your ass, this is HUMOR!

      Sep 26, 2010 at 4:05 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • declanto
      declanto

      @Aquilo: I agree, Norway is gently boring, because it’s one of the most open social environments in Europe. Gay-Friendly is comfortably, gently, uneventful. We’re all blissed out.

      Sep 26, 2010 at 4:15 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • evji108
      evji108

      Much higher res map located here: http://www.flickr.com/photos/alphadesigner/5009856543/

      Sep 28, 2010 at 10:43 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Prince
      Prince

      Why Serbia is homophobic tribe?? Its gay capitol of south-east Europe including Croatia. In Croatia there are no normal gay clubs,just small ones,they go to Belgrade.

      Oct 3, 2010 at 8:52 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • KN
      KN

      I know, my reply is a tad late. Just read the comments and might be able to enlighten some comnfusion :).

      @Jane: Barcelona reads Dancelona, London reads XXL, Berlin reads “Arm aber sexy” which is “poor but sexy” in English.

      @Bernie: The Netherlands are labelled Hash and Belgium as Waffles.

      A bigger version is available under: http://www.flickr.com/photos/alphadesigner/5009856543/sizes/o/

      Aug 4, 2011 at 6:15 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • The Hetero Joe
      The Hetero Joe

      @Joey:

      > @jason: Their culture is still…recovering. Hence outrageous fetishes and industrial music.

      No, it is not because their culture is still developing. It is, because their culture is, again, declining. Remember the NAZIS? Patent Leather, Uniforms, Dungeons (Auschwitz, Dachau, etc.)?

      The typical German virtues are: Zucht (disciplined breeding), Ordnung (order), Disziplin (same), Gehorsam (obedience, submissiveness) Pünktlichkeit (on time, to the tick), Fleiß (diligence). See a pattern? BRDSM! :-) “Sachverstand” (means “know-how, expertise, analytic thinking, it is actually two words: “knowledge of the thing” is the holy grail of the German mind, Menschenverstand (“human”-“knowledge”) is less common. The interest in the things, in the material world is higher than in the humane world. Gives: fetish.

      People, who are just about the numbers, who are just about discipline, are ideal candidates for a butt-plug, if you ask me :-)

      > Kind of like Japan and their strange fixation on the “cuteness” subculture (see Pokemon and Hello Kitty).

      I consider the Japanese to be the better Germans: Same kind of values, with the difference, that the Japanese do it like RealMan (“roaaarrr”), at least they have no problems pulling the plug (Sepuku, Harakiri, Kamikaze) in order to prove their complete loyalty and obedience to their masters. The Japanese have brought us the degradation of women as an art-form (by means of artistic bondage). BDSM. That’s why these two nations were so deeply allied in WW2. They fit well together. Two folks who put the systematic way of life above the humane/naive way of life. They seek for perfection. No-Body is perfect. Again, sado-masochistic tendencies (torturing the genitals (no-Body))

      Sick like shit.

      Apr 3, 2012 at 1:46 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

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