By explaining that there is not actually a âsudden spikeâ in lesbian and bi girls. Not that psychologist and author Dr. Leonard Sax cares much about that.
Thereâs a big difference between increases in actual numbers and increases in reported numbers. That phenomenon seems lost on Sax, who blogged on Psychology Today:
Psychologist John Buss estimates that for most of human history, perhaps 2% of women have been lesbian or bisexual (see note 1, below). Not any more. Recent surveys of teenage girls and young women find that roughly 15% of young females today self-identify as lesbian or bisexual, compared with about 5% of young males who identify as gay or bisexual (see note 2, below).
As a physician and a psychologist, what I found missing in the noise surrounding the Constance McMillen story was any serious discussion of why a growing number of girls self-identify as lesbian or bisexual. Not that thereâs anything wrong with that, as Seinfeld might say. But why are young women today at least three times more likely than their brothers to identify as bisexual or homosexual? âI kissed a girl and I liked it,â Katy Perry told us in her #1 hit single. Megan Fox, Lindsay Lohan, Lady Gaga, Anna Paquin, Angelina Jolie, Drew Barrymore â they all want us to know that they are bisexual. There is no comparable crowd of young male celebrities rushing to assure us that they go both ways. Imagine a young man singing âI kissed a boy and I liked it.â Would that song reach #1 on the charts? Why not?
Why is it OK for girls to be bisexual or homosexual, but not boys? Over the past seven years, Iâve posed this question to hundreds of teenagers and young adults across the United States. The most common answer I get isnât really an answer. âGirls kiss other girls at parties because guys like it,â one teenage girl told me. âIt makes the guys hoot and holler, so the girls do it again. Theyâre just doing it for attention. Itâs not for real.â I point out, as gently as I can, that that response doesnât answer my question. Pretending to be lesbian or bisexual doesnât explain why a growing proportion of young women are lesbian or bisexual.
Or does it? Female sexuality is different from male sexuality. If a straight boy kissed another boy, perhaps to amuse some girls who might be watching, he would be unlikely to undergo a change in sexual orientation as a result. But, as Professor Roy Baumeister at Florida State University and others have shown, sexual attraction in many women seems to be more malleable (see note 3 below). If a teenage girl kisses another teenage girl, for whatever reason, and she finds that she likes it â then things can happen, and things can change. If a young woman finds her soulmate, and her soulmate happens to be female, then she may begin to experience feelings sheâs never felt before.
PsychCentral.comâs John M. Grohol calls him out:
Sax also thinks thereâs a connection between the rise in young boys having ready and available access to pornography and this rise in female lesbian/bisexuality:
Maybe there is. A young woman told me how her boyfriend several years ago suggested that she shave her pubic hair, so that she might more closely resemble the porn stars who were this young manâs most consistent source of sexual arousal. She now identifies herself as bisexual.
Ah, okay. So we intermingle sketchy historical data with a few shocking anecdotes, and suddenly we have an explanation for this âsuddenâ rise in female bi-sexuality and lesbians. Or do we?
Of course we all know the value of anecdotes â they help relay a good story. Folks like Malcolm Gladwell like to couch scientific data in anecdotes to make that data more accessible and understandable (hence why heâs so popular).
But Gladwell tends not to drawn sweeping conclusions from the anecdotes themselves. Thatâs reserved for that actual empirical data.
Sax admits that we really donât know what the historical rate of female lesbianism or bisexuality has been. His only citation for suggesting thereâs been this crazy increase is a single citation from a psychology 101 textbook. Not exactly journal-level science there.
The simple and more probable explanation is found buried in Saxâs notes â that in different times, different standards were more acceptable. Therefore reporting of oneâs sexuality is likely to be biased toward those standards. In other words, itâs not that there are necessarily more lesbians and bisexuals today, itâs that people feel far more free and open to identify with that label without as much fear of societal or criminal prosecution.
And offers this tidy conclusion:
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
Itâs amazing what general societal acceptance will do for reporting of nearly anything. Look at mental health issues, for instance. Even just twenty years ago, the stigma was such that many people had a difficult time acknowledging their mental health concern. In many parts of the country, this same fear is still very much prevalent when it comes to acknowledging oneâs sexual orientation.
So the answer is likely far simpler â we have âmoreâ lesbians, bisexuals and gay men because itâs easier in todayâs society to acknowledge that youâre a lesbian, gay man or bisexual. It also wonât result in your criminal prosecution or rejection from society as it did in the past. The impact of reporting bias is significant for this issue, because in the past people simply didnât talk about these things openly. Or with researchers.
Josh
Yes, Sax’s blanket statement that there are “more lesbians and bisexuals” today than in recent human history is ridiculous. However, he does go on to raise interesting points, notably, why is it increasingly ok for women to identify as lesbian and bisexual while the same is not true for men? Why do we see such a dramatic spike in women identifying as lesbian and not a similar dramatic spike in men identifying as gay? This is especially interesting in light of the fact that increasing representations of gay people in popular culture almost predominately focus on the white, gay male experience. And yet it’s become easier for women to come out? That is the question that really deserves attention (and incidentally I think is the question on whcih Sax is truly focusing).
Lamar
I hate this stupid ‘it’s OK for women to go outside their traditional gender roles in society but not men’ double standard. A woman can greet her friend with a kiss or a hug but the second a man shows his affection similarly to another man he is called a ‘fag’. I also hate how men hate gays (their own gender) but love lesbians (the opposite gender), they should stick up for their own gender just as feminists rigorously do. Society is getting much less hostile for lesbians than Gaya which is a shame. (By the way I don’t believe that most female celebrities who come out as bi or lesbian actually are, it’s kinda trendy for women to do this now to increase their popularity and sex appeal among men. They won’t lose half as many friends and fans as a man would and they would be much safer from homophobic attacks).
takara
This shit. Is stupid. Not because celebrity are saying there bi , its because plain ans simple women are fucking sexy.i wasnt gay cause of of a fucking song or a damn celeb, its because i love women. They are sexy ,sweet damn fucking geniouses, when it comes to men,and especialy. Straight men frowning apon men that are gay cause of there fucking egos passed on ignorance shit from their father scaring the shit out of them. Straight men dont have a probe with women cause they think wi their dick and their dicks only. Who ever wrote this shit need to get hit upside their fucking head.
takara
Sorry on my phone od type delay
Jasun
I hate the on-going sentiment that lesbianism and female bisexuality is so much more accepted because it makes light of the fact that lesbians DO face homophobia and discrimination as well. I also don’t like that some gay men seem to like martyring themselves with a “I’m the bigger victim” badge when it comes to gay men vs. gay women, with a bunch of blanket statements about how much easier lesbians have it.
When a woman isn’t Kardishian/pornographic-sexy (and most women aren’t)…or at all interested in tantalizing the boys with their lesbianism, I imagine that the same society that supposedly so favors lesbians over gay men can very quickly become as hostile towards her about her sexuality. I haven’t met a lumber jack dyke yet who has benefitted from supposed social acceptance of girl-on-girl.
If lesbianism/female bisexuality is [slightly] more tolerated, it’s only on a very shallow level. And much of that also has to do with women not being taken as seriously as men overall. Many people don’t look at women as leaders or dominant figures the same way they do men, and at the same time women are more understated about their sexuality and tend to not be as quick to boast and brag about it…so, perhaps, that adds to gay and bisexual women being able to be more inconspicuous or dismissed.
As an active member of the gay community, with a number of lesbian friends, I can tell you that by and large they experience the same overall abuse. Their families are no more accepting…they too get ran out of the house as teens…they too deal with hostile moments at family gatherings…they too get gossiped about and called names at school…they too stand to lose their jobs if it gets out that they’re gay…they too get harrassed while out in public with their partners…they too get shunned and smeared by religion…they too get killed.
jason
Liberals have always glamorized female sexuality – including female bisexuality – but not male sexuality or male bisexuality. Women have tapped into this because it suits them financially. Women therefore exploit the double standard in order to get preferential treatment, including the associated rewards.
In a sense, this double standard proves that female sexuality is essentially a form of prostitution.
jason
Lamar,
Very true. I personally blame women for the bisexual double standard. Women are extremely devious creatures, using their bodies and overall sexuality as a form of marketing rather than to obtain sexual satisfaction. When a woman says she’s bisexual, more often than not it reflects her desire to obtain a reward from a straight man who has a fetish for girl-girl action.
Thumbs down to these women. We in the gay community are no longer going to tolerate you.
bruce
Don’t underestimate the distorting influence of porn movies. Porn movies that contain both sexes are very accepting of female bisexuality but only rarely of male bisexuality. When such movies are constantly produced and viewed by adults, it tends to reinforce the stigma against male bisexuality. Women are also to blame for they allow themselves to be bisexually exploited in these movies.
jeffree
This “sudden spike” in women being bi or lesbian is a creation of the mass media. Take a HUMAN SEXUALITY 101 course & you will learn that women’s sexuality is less “binary” & more “fluid” then mens’ sexuality,
If a woman admits 2 her female friends that she “swings both ways” it’s no huge deal. When a guy tells a str8 guy he might be bi- he gets beaten up or rejected or called bad words, if a bi guy tells a gay guy he is bi, then the gay guy assumes he is just “transitioning” & “just bi 4 now”.
Think about it: if you as a gay man, were asked by someone @ your front door if u were str8, bi or gay, wouldn’t you want 2 know WHO is asking and WHY? I work in a place where my male boss says he hates “queers.” Ask him about bi women & he will say “oh yea they are so HOT” –well unless theyre butch, probably.
So, in a country where men still dominate, the bi or gay guy gets bashed, the woman +still+ gets approval.
this issue is NOT about statistics, it’s about who is in charge : str8 men who see bi women as playtoys and who see bi men & gay men as enemies….
CONVERSATION CHAMBER
@bruce: I wish people would stop using porn as an example of the inequities between gay/bi-men and gay/bi-women. Porn is largely a man’s toy. By and large, there are only two main demographics for it: straight MEN and gay MEN.
So, by that token, it makes sense that girl/girl is welcomed in straight porn, while guy/guy isn’t. Girl/Girl gives straight men *2* of what they are attracted to. Straight men aren’t interested in other men. It’s, for all intents and purposes, the equivalent of there being no women in gay porn. Gay men don’t wanna see female sexuality…just like straight men don’t wanna see men play with each other either.
Is it making a little more sense now?
Lamar
I don’t think that women’s sexuality is more fluid than males, I think that because it is more accepted more women feel able to acknowledge their sexuality. In respone to Jasun – no-one is saying that bi women and lesbians do not face hardships and discrimination but it is an undeniable fact that they have it easier. For instance many ocuntries where male homosexuality is illegal female homosexuality is not. Many parents particularly fathers in surveys have said they would prefer to have a lesbian or a bisexual female than a gay or bisexual male. It is also undeniable that the vast majority of homophobic attacks are against males not females too. Violent homophobic attacks against female homosexuals are often being raped but for male homosexuals it is often death.
jason
Lamar,
You’re exactly right. There are many countries where female homosexuality is permitted but male homosexuality isn’t.
My point is that women exploit the bisexual double standard. They exploit it in the same way they exploit the clothing double standard.
Women know full well that they are contributing to the double standard. And, guess what? That’s exactly how they want it to be! Women have helped to create the bisexual double standard for their own selfish ends.
I think we need to start being very critical of women in general and particularly the women who exploit double standards, thus trivializing the concept of same-sex sexuality.
jason
Conversation Chamber,
Porn is an important example for one very important reason: it is the only medium which depicts explicit sexual activity.
While I agree that porn is not a good model on which to base our perceptions of human sexuality, the fact is that porn is pervasive and does have an effect on the way ordinary people perceive human sexuality.
Therefore, my argument is that porn has been hugely damaging to the GLBT community as a whole. It has created this “privileged” class of bisexual women and lesbians who appeal to straight guys, not because of their orientation but because of their fetish value to straight guys.
Moreover, you’ve fallen into the habit of using a fetish (ie straght men’s attraction to lesbians) to define an orientation (straightness in males). You cannot use a fetish to define an orientation.
As for your notion that straight men aren’t interested in other men in straight porn, LOLOLOL. If that’s the case, why are men with big dicks so popular in the porn that straight guys watch? Heck, straight guys love to watch men with big dicks in straight porn. Replace the big dicks with little dicks and I guarantee you it won’t be as popular.
Daniel
I love t.A.T.u.
Mako
Personally I don’t think it has anything to do with it being or not being easier to be a lesbian/bisexual women in society. I think it stems from bisexuality being a fashionable way to stamp out individuality. I have honestly met a 20 y/o girl who claimed to be bisexual, despite never doing anything sexually with either a man or woman. I asked if she ever fantasized or masterbated to a women or lesbian porn. She replied quickly with an ” Eww, I don’t masterbate!” I just shook my head and stepped away, confused by how someone who knows so little about themselves could claim to know their sexuality. That is probably the type of girls ( and I purposely mean girls not women) who this survey interviewed for their results. Just because you think Megan Foxx or Katy Perry are attractive does not make you lesbian, it just means you recognize beauty in someone the same sex as you. For the main point of the article about it being easier for gay women than gay men, I kinda have to agree. I think women are more accepted because most men never see them as 100% gay. Lots of men simply think women are lesbians because they haven’t had a real man to please them, or are too butch to get a real man so they have sex with women. Basically to most of the male population lesbians are just women keeping themselves busy till the men arrive. That is why it is a little more acceptable for women, because the general male population is in a case of denial.
sunnivie
@jason (not jasun),
Honey, your sexism is showing. Just because YOU hate women doesn’t mean they’re entirely responsible for or deserving of their own oppression and commodification.
Though it sure is easier to explain that way, isn’t it? Being thoughtful can really be a burden.
Matt
I’m not sure that it’s privilege that allows certain women to be out as lesbian or bisexual. In fact, I think it’s just the opposite. In my opinion, it has its roots in sexism and misogyny.
As some commenters have noted, the women who are “allowed” to be out about their sexuality are those who fuel straight men’s fantasies. Those who don’t meet the straight, white male standards of attractiveness are not so well accepted.
In addition, it is not as easy for gay and bi men to be out, first of all, because of the stereotype surrounding gay men–that they are “effeminate” (definitely a stereotype and an anti-woman one at that–it’s not okay to exhibit behaviors that are considered “feminine,” which are considered undesirable and “less than”).
Also, gay men engage in behavior that our society considers “female” behavior (loving and sleeping with men). And “female” behavior is considered “less than.”
Our society’s misogyny and denigration of women, femininity, and femaleness is, in my opinion, at the root of homophobia. It is why gay and bi men have more difficulty being out, in some cases, and it is why only certain lesbian and bisexual women are acceptable (because they fuel straight men’s fantasies, and straight men are the ones who set the standards).
I also question whether women have a more “fluid” sexual orientation than men do. I think certain women are allowed to have a fluid sexual orientation, once again because of straight male fantasies. Men are not allowed to have a fluid sexual orientation, and so they don’t express it as openly if they do have one.
Again, all my opinion.
so very much true
women going for their own sex is very common now, why is that? these women must have been so abused by the men that they were with at one time. i would say more than half of the women out there today are lesbians, and this will be a problem for straight men like me that are looking to meet a good straight woman today.
exactly right
these women that are lesbians, are the filthiest pigs ever. they are a disease that is spreading out of control today, and there is no cure for it. that explains why straight men like us cannot meet decent women now. i will never blame myself, because these women are the lowest form of garbage that were born by mistake. what was god thinking, when he created filth like this?
Mike UK
@exactly right: I’m of the assumption of what the fuck was he thinking when he made a cretin like you!!!! go back to watching your straight “lesbian” porn and have a wank and get over it!
exactly right
@mike uk burn in hell with the rest of these diseased pigs.
TASTEY GOODIES
@exactly right: YOU are a misogynist, heterosexist, homophobic sexophobe. “Men” like you are afraid of female sexuality that differs from your idea of what women should be. That is, catering to your archaic view that women should be submissive and for your viewing pleasure only.
THIS POST ALSO APPIES 2 YOU, TOO JASON!
why is this?
to tastey goodies, go play on the highway, you freak.
Mike UK
@exactly right: oh I intend too, I’m sure I’ll be with some very good company, the only downside to it is that you’ll probably be there as well!
TASTEY GOODIES
@Mike UK: Just ignore the trolls on this site, dude. I swear that there are emasculated breeder males on this site who want their homophobic rants 2 b heard. REALLY sad that they have 2 hide behind a computer to act tough and bully others cuz they have no cajones!
TASTEY GOODIES
@why is this?: I TRIPLE DOG DARE YOU 2 PLAY W/ ME ON THE HIGHWAY! Yes, I am a freak and oh soooooo proud of it!
Mike UK
@TASTEY GOODIES: oh they don’t bother me, they’re pathetic, it’s more fun to take the piss and have a laugh at how ridiculous they are. đ
Mike UK
: )@TASTEY GOODIES: a triple dare, now that’s serious! đ
TASTEY GOODIES
@Mike UK: TRU DAT! THEY R BLOODY PATHETIC WANKERS THAT HAVE NOT HAD THEIR TWIG AND BERRIES PLAYED WITH IN GOD KNOWS HOW LONG. I WONDER WHY?!!! HMMMMMMMMM.
how right says
god will destroy all the filth that is out there someday. all of you included.
for his glory
anyone who’s name was not written in the lambs book of life, will be thrown in the lake of fire. God made away to escape. God is holy. and we are sinful from birth thanks to adam and eve. jesus said we must be born again 3:5. spiritually. i would suggest people to research the new world order. john todd. the illuminati. the scottish rite freemasonry. builderbergs. these people own the media and control what you watch. is bigger than what you think gay people you can be changed. just trust me do the test look up what i told you