FUNNY LADY

EXCLUSIVE: Kathy Griffin’s New Bravo Show Might Be Too Gay To Function

Kathy, Kathy Griffin‘s new weekly series on Bravo, is not another season of her life on the not-so-D List. And it’s not a talk show in the traditional sense. Premiering Thursday night at 10pm EST, the hourlong show will be very free-form: No band, no skits—and no celebrities.

Not that the stars foibles won’t be discussed. Griffin just wants to be able to snipe at them in peace.

“I am not gonna have celebrity guests. Why would I?” she exclaims. “Nothing is off limits—no person is off limits. I just have to surround myself with civilians. I want to really be able to talk smack about [them], which I can’t do if they’re sitting in a swivel chair two inches away from me.”

In fact, the only star sharing the stage with the redhead spitfire is her mom, Maggie, who will be Chuy to Griffin’s Chelsea. “Now that my mother’s become an international superstar, she’s trying to pull some difficult diva b.s,” teases Griffin. “Now she wants wine in a bottle.”

Queerty’s Evan Mulvihill chatted with Griffin about the new show, her gays and Santorum—the politician, that is.

 

What shows are you using as inspiration for Kathy‘s format?

Kids Say The Darndest Things and Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader. No, to tell you the truth, I’m 51-year- old. Elements of Carson inspired me—everything from when Joan Rivers took over and, of course, was outrageous. The Mike Douglas Show, all the shows that are currently on. What I’m going to do on the show, and I would appreciate it if you didn’t anyone tell at NBC Universal about this, I’m going to really have a lack of structure that will be dazzling to you and a nightmare to the editing booth. I think it should have a discussion feel, a chatty feel and, more importantly, people should feel free to say whatever the fuck they want.

What do you have on the show for your gay fans?

I have a little too much for them. My struggle is going to get the straights. This show is for married men on the down-low. For experimental men who are a little too well-dressed. Ones with girlfriends who they’re just waiting for the right time to tell her something. Or guys who just cheated on their girlfriends and really need to fucking make it up to her. This is for guys that can fake liking the show for their girlfriend, but actually don’t give a shit and are just trying to get laid.

 

Click through for more of Queerty’s interview with Kathy Griffin

 

Kathy premieres on April 19th at 10pm EST Bravo. Photos:Lola Broadus. Philip Nelson, gdcgraphics, Bravo


What about bisexuals?

You will see more bisexual people on this show per capita than are included in the world population. Have you met my friend Andy Dick, because he should be your poster child. I asked Andy about his sexuality one time, and he’s basically just said, “When I’m with a girl, I think, ‘Oh my god, she’s so beautiful,’ and then when I see a boy, I leave her and go over to him and say, ‘Oh my god, he’s so beautiful.'”

The struggle on this show is to get one fuckin’ heterosexual. This show is basically straight-bashing at this point. We are very very LGBTQIA friendly. Bravo has just given me my own campaign. I go to the Hill and have rallies.

Speaking of the gays, are you going to take down your fellow Bravo talk-show cost Andy Cohen? He’s kind of your competition now.

I wouldn’t say I’m going to go down on Andy Cohen. Frankly, I don’t think he would appreciate it. And, you know, I tend to gag. I have a bad gag reflex that I’m working on. But we might talk about blow jobs on the show.

I talked to NBC Universal, and they said I don’t have to have any of the Bravo [cast members] on if I don’t want to. If it lends itself to what we’re talking about, maybe. Actually I don’t know if I’m ever going to have the Bravo people on. I don’t think I could complete a sentence if I’m trying to deal with the lights coming off of NeNe’s sparkly Louboutins. I might find that blinding.

Does it make you a coward to not want to say these negative things to the celebrities’ faces?

No, no, it makes me a lady. I prefer to talk about people behind their backs. I find it more freeing, and I can really say what I think. I prefer to wait till someone’s left the room, and then I just let it rip.

What is this about your getting banned from the Today show again?

Yes, I was indeed re-banned from the Today show. That’s the reason I’m late. I was in my bathroom, where I have a TV—because I’m famous. I saw myself in the marquee on CNN, and I couldn’t believe my good fortune. Kathy Griffin re-banned from the Today show. When you see yourself on CNN, you stop what you’re doing. It was very exciting.

The Today show just said you’re not banned though.

My publicist called the show. We thought since NBC Universal is the owner of Bravo, why won’t they have me on NBC’s Today show? They say that [newscaster] Natalie Morales thinks I was rude to her at the Golden Globes. Clearly she had me confused with Gwyneth Paltrow!

Are you going to ban anyone from your show?

I have not banned myself yet, but that’s up to the network’s discretion. I guess I could try to be cool and pretend like I banned some dead people. Napoleon, totally banned. Elvis, not invited. No Tupac nor Biggie, nor a hologram of any of those people. I haven’t banned a fuckin’ throw pillow, I haven’t started yet!

 

Click through for more of Queerty’s interview with Kathy Griffin

Kathy premieres on April 19th at 10pm EST Bravo. Photos:Lola Broadus. Philip Nelson, gdcgraphics, Bravo


 

What will your take on Hollywood be?

Hollywood’s full of shit. Not unlike high school. You have to call them on it. In addition, we will look at the insane and hilarious political race and other crazy news and entertainment items. This is your destination if you don’t have a life.

Who is going to be the first advertiser to abandon Kathy?

Well, you know, we are 100% sponsored by ChristianMingle.com. And the Latter Day Saints. Focus on the Family bought a ton of ad time. Them and PajamaJeans.

What do you think about Rick Santorum? He’s dropped out of the race, but will you still bring him up?

I’m taping this week, so he is still very much on my gaydar. He doesn’t even walk upright at this point, that’s how backwards this guy is. As a comedian, I do miss having him in the race. But you know what? These conservative anti-LGBT dudes, they always find some crazy fucked-up job in the private sector. He’ll probably start some group called Families Who Care About Puppies. They’re always an anti-gay group with a pretty sweet name.

What’s his problem with gay people, anyway?

Maybe Rick was raised by two bitchy gay guys who didn’t get along. Look, they’re not all good, honey. Sometimes you gotta throw the baby back with the bath water. He could’ve got a hold of a couple bad gays, you never know.

Nah, I’m gonna go with, “Doesn’t believe in civil rights.”

What did you think of Anderson Cooper‘s giggle fest last week?

I love it. The way he lost it last week, my favorite moment was, with tears in his eyes, saying, “This is torture.” He was laughing so hard. He will never hear the end of it from me about that.

One last thing: How can reporters ask celebrities smart-ass questions and not get fired?

That’s why I don’t really want to have celebrity guests. You can’t just have Madonna on and say, “When’s the last time you got your fillers? Who’s your doctor? What was the healing time? Do you have any before and after pictures?” You’d get fired for all of those.

So, I don’t know. I’m in the business of getting fired. I was just banned from the Today show, and I don’t even know why. So if you wanna know how to get banned or fired, I’m your girl. As far as how to ask a question and not get banned, I would suggest that you call Rita Rudner. Now, I have to go watch the news. I just heard I’m unbanned from the Today show, and I’m not happy about it.

Kathy premieres on April 19th at 10pm EST Bravo. Photos:Lola Broadus. Philip Nelson, gdcgraphics, Bravo

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