Queerty is better as a member
I don’t understand Jodie. They love her here in Hollywood. She has great respect as an actress and more. WHY in 2013 is she still SCARED? Yeah she sort of came out, but really, she just showed her fear and NON bravery. PLUS, she lost so many points by insulting those who came out like Ellen DeGeneres, Ricki Martin, Anderson Cooper, Rosie O’Donnell and more. Come on Jodie! You just got an award … just accept it and be grateful. Don’t criticize those who come out. How insulting!
I understand those just starting their acting careers, but Jodie has been around for a long time in the acting profession with great success stories. Why would she care about coming out as a lesbian?
It’s great she’s sorta coming out … but seriously. At 50 years and with so many years in the acting profession and so many successes in the film industry, and still she’s scared.
Hope one day she will finally be true to herself and be free to just be herself.
@FunMe: She’s been in the public eye since she was three, I can kind of understand her being a bit weird about privacy.
@FunMe: I agree. I think she’s entitled to her privacy, but she seemed to diss those who came out in a big way (and in a way that actually helps the cause). She also seemed bitter and defensive. It was sad.
Oh, just lighten up. Not everyone has to bust out of the closet with a parade and Macy’s balloons. She has her reasons for being afraid to come out, plus she really values her privacy.
Geez. Nothing is ever good enough for some of you people.
Doesnt matter. Like A. Cooper, people’s coming out doesnt have to be a big event.
She is now out. Publicly. We want em all out. Publicly helping our cause. So yeah, I’m happy she is out.
Never realized acceptance speeches look so long written down.
@FunMe: So you are basically saying no one understood that she was gay yet here you are commenting on it.
Even little bieber tweens that cut themselves over at twitter knew she was talking about being gay.
I think Jodie Foster has been spending too much time with Mel Gibson. She’s starting to sound weird.
She waited years to come out. I don’t consider her particularly gay-friendly. She hasn’t helped our cause. It’s always been about her as far as I’m concerned. Selfish cow.
Good for her and f&%k the haters.
I’m looking at the comments here and I am perplexed at some of you.
This woman has never hidden her sexuality, she was partnered for 20 years! Her ex-partner is in photo after photo along side Jodie as they were spotted everywhere together.
The disdain for her after she publicly came out, just not in the way you’d expect, is just ignorant at best. If you had a stalker who delivered mail to your mailbox all the time, then ran off to assassinate Ronald Reagan after leaving you a letter telling you about it, I’m sure you’d value privacy as well.
@FunMe, What’s really “insulting” is some of you bashing someone who made the largest donation to The Trevor Project and financed the movie ‘Trevor.’ Someone who publicly thanked her ex-partner in love, and told 250 million viewers that she came out ages ago to her friends and family isn’t scared at all. She didn’t insult anyone in her speech, in a nutshell she basically said people expect celebs to spew their orientation into the public domain and she is not like that as she values her privacy.
It’s sad when someone with a stature like hers comes out in her own way, people demand more of her or don’t think telling it to 250 million viewers was enough. Get over yourselves, for real.
Jodie Foster comes across as selfish and sour. Don’t like her. Just because she’s considered one of us, it doesn’t mean we have to like her. Straights don’t like other straights just because they’re straight. They discern according to personality. Jodie has an ugly personality in my view.
If Jodie were to disappear from the showbiz scene, there’d be one less a-hole to worry about.
I really think that she was talking more about the current Hollywood culture, that celebrities are supposed to tweet or put out everything that happens in their private lives because people feel that they are entitled to know everything. I didn’t get the feeling that she was insulting the people that chose to come out that way, but more the fact that people feel obliged to. But hey, I could be totally wrong.
@Brian: No one’s telling you you have to like her, dear.
Who cares whether you like someone or not, other than you?
… About-AS-shocking as Ricky Martin!?! LOL!!!
yawn…really, REALLY…leave here in peace…she is from another generation, it’s OK to be quiet. And we all knew she was gay…I agree, let her have her privacy.
Okay…one can cheer and congratulate Ms. Foster’s BRAVERY or can conclude the entire speech was a HOT MESS! This big bruhaha is sooo WHO CARES?
I thought it was a beautiful speech, especially the end when she said that she will write stories so quiet that only a dog could hear its whistle. Totally cool. She seems to have a ton of pain, but the friends needed to work through it. I wish her the best of luck and peace.
It was an odd speech. She appeared a bit nervous, rambling all over the place in her speech. She publically “came out” without actually saying she was gay. She said “good bye” to Hollywood, but said she would still be working on projects. She loved on her mama. She sounded a bit drunk, frankly. I know that she and Mel Gibson worked on that Beaver movie together, and have maintained a friendship throughout the years (why, I’ll never understand, since he is such a bigot), but he looked oddly conspicuous – so out of place – as if her table was the only one that would welcome him (maybe it was) and he still felt uncomfortable sitting with her brood.
Jodie Foster is not relevant in 2013. Everybody knew her sexual orientation ha ha. Bless her.
Could it be she was reluctant to come out because it was *totally predictable* that some people would be calling her a “selfish cow,” or complaining that it was cowardly not to have done it years ago, or second-guessing the motives for some of her friendships and professional relationships?
P.S. I’ve loved her since “Candleshoe.” (I wasn’t old enough to see “Taxi Driver” until much, much later!)
Jodie’s speech was beautifully nuanced, intelligently constructed and gently preachy. This was not a coming out speech – as she said she did that a long, long time ago. It was a gentle story about love- of her mother, her children, her ex lover and an acknowledgement that everyone has a right to live hit a life outside of a magnifying lass. Being an actor should not mean having to forsake a private life. The speech was clearly too esoteric for some readers here and it’s not for anyone to judge her choices when they have not hurt anyone. I did think her comments about public fanfare coming out events was unnecessary, but in a way she was underscoring how stupid it is that this is still an issue. Be gentle folks.She won the game on her own terms. Only the bigots were losers here! Because she made them look like the fools they are. The shots of Mel Gibsons face proved that. How amazing though he supped at the Lesbians table. It was an evening of Irony all round.
@AEH: I totally agree! Everyone comes out in their own time and way and to whom they feel good about first. She was not demeaning people who publicly came out earlier or more dramatically. Give it a rest!
@Brian: Your comments reflect a very closed and hateful mind. I’ve been out and an active fighter for GLTBQ rights for over forty years and I welcome here more public coming out no matter how long it took. Have some perspective and quite being a judgmental jerk!
@Jeffery: Bravo for your truth-telling to the snobs and holier-than-thou idiots who want to jump all over those who made their own choices about to whom and when she came out. She has down much to support our rights privately and publicly and should be appreciated for it. You haters just can’t see the forest for the trees. At least she isn’t a Log Cabin Republican or worse a GOProud. You should direct your judgmental attitudes of closeted power brokers to those that deserve it. The apologists for the Republican right wing’s anti-gay/lesbian policies!
to my brothers and sisters, I am mighty old…I have, and not sure how I did it, never been in the closet, this was not easy to do growing up in the 50’s and 60’s…give it a rest folks…we all have our own way of dealing with the prejudice and hatred we have encountered. Ms Foster is a wonderful Actor, and she has lived her life as she wishes…BRAVO JODI!
It seems that someone was in the cups and had a bit of liquid courage. More power to her.
OK…. I just finished listening to the entire speech and I love her even more. She did it on her terms and I get it. Everyone has the right to come out in their own way and I think her speech was brilliant. Kudos to you Jody.
I think she is a class act. She reached out like a child to the compassionate adult in us all as if we, her audience, were holding something on her and she wanted to be appreciated by each person watching. It really left me speechless. A friend who goes to movies a lot but doesn’t particularly care about the gossip said, “Oh, yeah, a lesbian. Everyone knows that.” OK, but everyone is the fan in a state that requires pregnant women to spread so that a device can be inserted into their most private part. That fan must also be addressed. She did the best she (or anyone in her situation) could do. Like John Wayne in “The Searchers,” “What do I gotta do, spell it out for ya?”
I think it’s great that Jodie took a moment to be honest about herself and she deserves kudos for it. As a member of the community (such as it is), I am grateful to her and respect her for that. As a human being, however, who loves the women in his life as well as people of all religious backgrounds and creeds, it becomes increasingly hard to reconcile her continued defense of and friendship with an unrepentant misogynist, bigot, homophobe and religious extremist like Mel Gibson. It’s hard to believe a man who literally considers himself “more catholic than the pope” genuinely respects her lifestyle or her gender, and it is equally difficult to believe that a person can proudly be friends with that sort of person without sharing some of his beliefs.
On another note, of course she’s private- can you imagine that fear and guilt one must carry knowing one man almost died and another ended up a quadriplegic because your public persona attracted a crazy fan? I wouldn’t be surprised if she never left the house.
@NateB79: That’s what has spoiled Hollywood for me- the fact that some celebrities (And the vitriolic paparrazzi)feel that we, the public, DO need to know EVERYTHING about celebrity life…. what made the great celebrities truly GREAT, aside from their talent- was the mystique that the studio publicists wove around their lives. Re: Jodie- she’s come out in her own way-a truly personal decision….who are any of us to say HOW she should have done it?! Be happy that one more celebrity has chosen to stand up and be counted. I was surprised, though, that in the tribute they didn’t include her very FIRST appearance- that of the coppertone girl having her bottoms pulled off by the puppy on the beach. That would have been a great last image to use!
At lease she’s not a fair-weather friend, Christopher. I respect her for her loyalty to their friendship. Many others may have washed their hands of him. Perhaps the mercy she has shown will pull him out of the mire. Who knows what draws people to each other. We are all outsiders, until we find one another.
@Jeffery: Well stated, and I could not agree with you more!
@FunMe: (@ FUN ME) OH get off your soap box. She didn’t insult anyone.
I for one would like to know JUST how many gay men and women CAME OUT to the world by announcing their sexual identity in their Home town newspapers….I’ll BET none, nada!! So why does this woman have to do it? Some stars come out and some don’t. Big friggin’ deal!
To be honest with all of you I have mixed feelings about Jodie Foster’s speech. Which feels appropriate in a way, in that I have long had mixed feelings about Jodie herself. We’re both women, and lesbians, and age-wise we’re contemporaries. As the times have changed, my life and the way I think about living it has evolved. It’s my sense that that’s been true for Jodie Foster as well. I can empathize with her dilemmas: whether to say, and when to say it, and how much does everyone need to know?
Even so, I get Brian’s anger; I have been among those who were very critical of Jodie Foster’s silence. There were times when I felt infuriated by her. But I’ve also had to concede the point that it’s much easier to talk the talk when it’s not you up there trying to figure out how to walk the walk with the whole world watching (and judging) every move you make.
I also acknowledge that even the most celebrated among us have a need for and a right to some kind of zone of privacy (logically the most celebrated among us would need it more than most). Of course every celeb on the planet gives lip service to the concept of privacy, but I think Jodie Foster has been one of the few who has truly valued a quieter, more low-key existence. And in an increasingly frenetic and vulgar celebrity universe, in which literally anything goes as long as they spell your name right, I’ve rather liked her for that.
But we should be able to say without being accused of hating on Jodie that there is a difference between privacy and secrecy. Jodie Foster was born in a much less tolerant era and came of age in an industry run by money and fear, a Hollywood that insisted LGBT performers adhere to a strict set of rules. Jodie has lived by those rules, avoiding in interview after interview over the years any unambiguous, yes-it’s-true acknowledgement of her sexual orientation. Yes, she was protecting her privacy. But let’s be clear, she was also doing what she was told, often by other, older closet cases. She was protecting her job (and theirs) and her wealth (and theirs) and her standing (and theirs) in the entertainment community. She was doing this even as the stakes went up with the AIDS crisis and tragedies like the Matthew Shepard killing. She was doing this even as more and more ordinary folks stood up and came out and shared their stories, as our increasing visibility provoked hateful, sometimes violent pushback.
So I don’t know what Jodie Foster means when she says she did her coming out “about a thousand years ago.” The news sure didn’t reach me here in the Midwest. It’s been commented here and there that she has done a lot for LGBT causes, including the Trevor Project. I think that’s admirable, but I had no idea. I’ll bet a lot of us didn’t know. Maybe Jodie would have faced less criticism if more of us were aware of how much she has contributed to LGBT causes. But then, in order for that to happen she would have to have been more forthcoming about it. And that’s kind of the point, isn’t it?
Given that all of us don’t live in media centers like New York and L.A., what does it mean when we talk about someone famous being out of the closet? Have we reconstructed the word so that its meaning applies differently to celebrities? And are all of us supposed to be on board with that?
I guess when all is said and done, the bottom line is that for good and all Jodie Foster has come out. That’s what matters… But honesty matters too, and it bothers me just a little when celebrities like Jodie Foster–trying perhaps to get out in front of what-took-you-so-damn-long criticism–look right at us as they rewrite history, deciding it’s time to say it by insisting it was said already, a thousand years ago.
If I could I would say to Jodie: Girl, I understand. Even when I was impatient with you, I understood. All these years I’ve been watching you walk that line. Hemmed in by hypocrites who told you not to cause trouble. To keep your head down and your mouth shut. You were scared and conflicted. Just like the rest of us. Just like me. Welcome home.
I agree with those who say that Jodie Foster is somewhat reticent about talking about her private life and has been throughout her career. Maybe it has something to do with the unwanted and undeserved publicity she got following John Hinckley shooting President Reagan and then claiming he did it to impress her. Since then she has shied away from the publicity mill that is Hollywood. I can’t say I blame her.
@AEH: This is the best dang response I’ve read. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Nothing more need be said.
Like we didnt know she was a lesbian?!
I sat there watching in stunned silence but thinking, “come on Jodi, say or don’t say it but stop teasing your audience and mocking ur predecessors and disrespecting your partner”, eventually I was just plain embarrassed for her. Jodi didn’t even mention her partner’s name. It was like WTF Jodi why bother? WTF are you doing? WhereTF are you going with this? Nothing was required, take ur award, say thanks, sit down. Instead, a smart, accomplished person, looked ridiculous with her meandering, self-indulgent, exercise in verbosity (with the exception about her Mom). I wasn’t disappointed that Jodi Foster didn’t really “come out”. Come on, be honest folks, she really didn’t – you needed a roadmap to follow her for crissakes. I’m disappointed that Jodi Foster teased us and wasted our time. That’s not “out and proud”. That’s immature and silly. Jodi Foster is better then that, so again “WTF was the point, Jodi?”
A. You didn’t watch the speech.
B. You only heard what you wanted to hear.
Here is a copy/paste of the actual (partial) transcript, which debunks your claim she didn’t mention her partners name. I’m not going to bother responding to the rest of your post, you obviously didn’t listen to her speech.
“There is no way I could ever stand here without acknowledging one of the deepest loves of my life, my heroic co-parent, my ex-partner in love but righteous soul sister in life, my confessor, ski buddy, consigliere, most beloved BFF of 20 years, Cydney Bernard. Thank you, Cyd. I am so proud of our modern family.”
Funny how a person can “come out” without actually using the word “gay” or “lesbian”…lol. What was with the audio silencing during her “coming out” confessional? Was the network afraid of offending some homophobic bigots?
Jodie Foster was obviously extremely nervous about how coming out would impact her career. The table seating seemed obviously staged to present a very “normal” heterosexual group including 2 kids and Mel Gibson, previously known for his drunken racist and homophobic rants. Also absent, was her supposedly BFF best friend, mother of her kids, and ex-lover. I can not believe that she was that terrified of what the public would think. It’s pretty common knowledge that she is gay. It’s weird to think that studio executives are that concerned about an actor or director being gay in 2013, for God’s sake. Haven’t we already blazed that trail with so many “out” gay actors, musicians, directors etc. ?????
She always been amazing..remains so..
Thank you for pointing that out and clarifying for me. You’re right, I stand corrected on that point. Frankly, I didn’t know Jodi Foster’s (ex-) partner’s name and when the camera shot to the table during this particular line it didn’t focus on anyone but the picture of a man was more obvious then anyone else and so I thought she was referring to someone named “Sidney” not Cydney and was even more confused then at that point. I may be guilty for being ignorant about the name of her ex-partner but, in my mind, the criticism still stands, in fact it backs up my point: Jodi Foster gave such a meandering, unfocused, confusing, self-indulgen acceptance speech more in defense of “privacy” and I still don’t know “what”!! And, oh yeah, she slipped in the confusing line about Cydney. Miss one or two of those descriptives, esp at that point in her looong speech, and you wouldn’t know if Cydney was male or female! I “came out” on the front page of the LA Times. It was very clear what I was doing and what I was saying. So do it or don’t do it. TWO SENTENCES in an exhaustingly long speech is hardly “coming out” – never even mentioned her sexuality. So again, do it right, be “out and proud”, or don’t do it at all when you have a platform to hopefully impact millions of people. This was a silly, unfocused, somewhat homophobic even, long drawn out statement about “WHAT” and for “WHAT PURPOSE”???
So…….If someone doesn’t come out to your exact specifications then they are blah blah blah. Just shut up and accept it for what it is. Judgemental Queens need to just get a life.
That’s just it “dannybear_mn”, I don’t know what “it” was that Jodi Foster did? And unlike you, I didn’t attack or name-call Jodi Foster as a person. I strongly criticized how and what she did. Paradoxically, Jodi Foster used a forum watched by millions PRIMARILY to defend at length her privacy rights NOT “out” herself notwithstanding her two confusing and oblique references to her same-sex relationship. (It’s a little pathetic that so many are star struck, need to rush and embrace and outing when it clearly was not.) Instead, it was a lost opportunity before millions of viewers to eloquently, impactfully defend same sex marriage rights not defend her privacy rights. Worse, she went further and ridiculed other “stars” who truly have “outed” themselves, some at great professional risk. Jodi Foster puts a higher value on her right of privacy. Fine. Then beautifully honor your Mother, say “thanks” and sit down. What a waste and self-indulgent bore. (Oh and you, my friend, surely are more capable of a more grown-up and thoughtful critique of what I said and less quick to embrace smoke not fire.)
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