Lesbians love Jodie Foster. Like, really, really love Jodie Foster.

Sure, the legendary actress may refuse to come out of her glass closet, but those labia lovers are willing to overlook such secrecy. It surely didn't stop sappho-journo Kim Ficera from dedicating her most recent "Don't Quote Me" column to her unrequited lesbian love.

While Ficera highlights Foster's talent, beauty and brains, she loves Foster so much becasue, well, she's not Tatum O'Neal:

Not that there's anything wrong with Tatum O'Neal; I love Paper Moon as much as the next lesbian (especially since Jodie starred as Addie Pray in the short-lived TV version of the movie).

It's just that the unfortunate truth is, child stars come and go, but mostly they just go. Some, like Tatum, try to come back, but whatever appeal they had as children vanishes over time with their cute little hats. And what's left looks too much like desperation. For them, the ability to land a good movie is gone and too often replaced with a need to write a tell-all book. And there's nothing sexy about bitterness.

Jodie is one of the few child stars who has stood the test of early fame and never sacrificed her integrity in the process.

How much integrity does it take to stay in the closet? We'd like to see a pie-chart or something…

Also, we'd like to tell Tatum O'Neal that she's swell. Sure, she's a total wash-up, but that's part of the allure. Lesbians can be so judgmental!