Kentucky Masons May Groan About Gays, But They Won’t Ban Them
Kentucky’s Masons — and raise your hand if you fully understand what Masonic lodges actually do — won’t bans gays, even though there’s a known one (John Wright) in their midst.
I’m a Mason, and gay, and there are no actual “laws” forbidding gays. It really depends on the lodge – most are conservative old men and hiding it from them is usually the status quo (I’m in my 20s, and not out at ALL in the lodge). I thought hiding it would be okay with me when I initially joined, but I’m changing my mind quickly (and debating whether I should withdraw my membership).
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Based on my extensive knowledge of “Simpsons” reruns, I can say with some authority that the Masons:
1. Control the British crown
2. Keep the metric system down
3. Keep Atlantis off the maps
4. Keep the Martians under wraps
5. Hold back the electric car
6. Make Steve Guttenberg a star
7. Rob cave fish of their sight
8. Rig every Oscar night
You’re welcome.
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Oh oh I know. A Kentucy Mason is a jar for holding chewed tobacco spit. A collection of these spit jars is called a lodge.