Queerty is better as a member

Log in | Register
  HOLY $%$!

Kinky Illinois Priest Calls 911 To Help Get Him Out Of Handcuffs

fr-tom-donovanContrary to popular belief, Catholic priests don’t spend all their time railing against the LGBT community: Sometimes they get in over their head with kinky scenes and have to call 911.

In late November, Father Tom Donovan of St. Aloysius in Springfield, IL, called emergency workers to help him get out of handcuffs he had gotten himself stuck in:

The Illinois Times reports:

“I’m going to need help getting out before this becomes a medical emergency,” Father Tom Donovan told a dispatcher who sounds a bit incredulous during the Nov. 28 call.

“You’re stuck in a pair of handcuffs?” the dispatcher asks.

“[I was] playing with them and I need help getting out,” Donovan responds.

Donovan told the dispatcher that he was alone in the rectory. It’s not clear exactly how he ended up in handcuffs or why he feared a medical emergency. His voice sounds garbled or muffled on the tape, and sources say that police discovered some sort of gag on the priest when they arrived.

Donovan was eventually freed from his self-induced captivity and was granted a leave of absence by Bishop Thomas Paprocki. If Paprocki’s name rings a bell, that’s because he just testified against Illinois’ proposed marriage-equality bill yesterday, saying it would undermine the “natural family” structure.

Right.

Below, check out Donovan’s hilarious 911 call

 h/t: Joe. My. God.

By:           Dan Avery
On:           Jan 4, 2013
Tagged: , , , , , , , ,

  • 24 Comments
    • rextrek
      rextrek

      “The Power of Christ Compels you…” LOL

      Jan 4, 2013 at 12:35 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • darkmoonman
      darkmoonman

      At lesat it’s a break from the norm for RCC priest: “RCC Priest Assaults Altarboy: Pope Benny Says It’s Okay”

      Jan 4, 2013 at 1:59 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • D P
      D P

      @rextrek: – That’s TOO funny! Love it!

      Jan 4, 2013 at 1:59 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Rockery
      Rockery

      So embarrassing. I would take up drugs or something

      Jan 4, 2013 at 2:58 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • jmi2
      jmi2

      sounds like the dispatcher was having all he could do to not laugh. i think he realized where the call was calling from (helloooo, caller ID!) and then when the ‘person’ acknowledged he was at the church, it must have been really tough for the dispatcher to not guffaw!!!!!

      priceless, absolutely priceless…

      Jan 4, 2013 at 3:04 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • jmi2
      jmi2

      @Rockery: i think if you listen to the man’s voice ‘or something’ was a definite choice…

      Jan 4, 2013 at 3:05 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • PABWECG
      PABWECG

      Not that I don’t think this is hilarious, because it is, but…

      “Contrary to popular belief, Catholic priests don’t spend all their time railing against the LGBT community…”

      I hope people know that for MOST Catholic priests in this country, THIS statement is true.

      Jan 4, 2013 at 3:29 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • natriley
      natriley

      This is a disgusting homophoic action by the police. The public safety was not involved and there should have been no public disclosure. By mocking the man, they abandon any pretense of professionalism.

      Jan 4, 2013 at 5:04 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • toren123
      toren123

      Often toyed (pun intended!) with the idea of bondage and discipline, wondering how I would react psychologically. Always concluded, “No, not a good idea!” I’m too afraid of the guys walking off and leaving me there!

      Jan 4, 2013 at 5:27 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jerry12
      Jerry12

      He is kinda good looking. Why did he have to do a “Do it yourself” bit, and get all tangled up? I am sure some members of his parish would have been happy to help him out of his dillema.

      Jan 4, 2013 at 5:28 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Ann Mason
      Ann Mason

      @natriley: I agree completely. It’s too easy for schadenfreude to take charge of our thinking when we hear about something like this, and then we fail to consider how personal embarrassments become public.

      It doesn’t sound as if the police had a legitimate reason to share that information with the media. Although there is some benefit to being reminded that high-profile homophobes have skeletons in their closets, this dubious news report might discourage some people from dialing 911 when they need help with delicate situations. It’s unfortunate the police didn’t think of that.

      At the same time, let’s consider another side of the issue: If the police had made an effort to be discreet and the story was made public anyway, would we suspect the authorities of protecting the Catholic Church at the expense of the LGBT population? I’ll bet some of us would have questions.

      Jan 4, 2013 at 5:30 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Dominickj
      Dominickj

      If anything the priest is homophobic, not the 911 crew, and how did he get a gag stuck in his mouth?

      From the article: “His voice sounds garbled or muffled on the tape, and sources say that police discovered some sort of gag on the priest when they arrived.”

      Jan 4, 2013 at 6:16 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Shadeaux
      Shadeaux

      Freaky ass!

      Jan 4, 2013 at 6:26 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Joetx
      Joetx

      @PABWECG: From my experience, the OVERWHELMING MAJORITY of Catholic priests either remain silent as their leadership rails against the LGBT community or are willing accomplices.

      This is coming from a cradle Catholic, too.

      Jan 4, 2013 at 9:39 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • unclemike
      unclemike

      @natriley: @Ann Mason: 911 calls are available to the public all the time (usually for evidence-gathering for trials or similar); the police may have had nothing to do with the disclosure. A news reporter may have heard on a police scanner or from a witness about an ambulance showing up at the church and asked police for the call. The police have to release it.

      Since there’s been no hint of a male partner (yet) I don’t see how this could be homophobic, either.

      Jan 4, 2013 at 9:47 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • natriley
      natriley

      @unclemike: I stand corrected, it was kinky not gay, but in general people who laugh at other people’s embarrassment are morally wrong, and judging by the comments here, I suspect there are many whose desire to laugh is stronger than their sense of kindness. In NYC, this would never be in the paper, it’s one reason why we like big cities.

      Jan 4, 2013 at 10:42 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Geoff B
      Geoff B

      If it had been Paprocki in the handcuffs it would have been schadenfraudelicious. And no, I wouldn’t feel the least bit bad about laughing at him.

      Jan 5, 2013 at 1:20 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Mykey
      Mykey

      Why are all the comments assuming he’s gay? Even straights get kinky…

      Jan 5, 2013 at 3:53 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Aaron
      Aaron

      @natriley: Actually, if a Catholic priest who just took the stand to comment on the immorality of same sex marriage called 911 to free himself of handcuffs and a gag two days later – it WOULD be news in NYC. The news is not that a priest was doing some kinky self-stimulation, the news is that the same priest tried to get all high and mighty about “God’s plan” for sex and marriage just a few days earlier.

      Jan 5, 2013 at 4:41 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • gppm1103
      gppm1103

      I hope he didn’t use real cuffs…they hurt too much. Next time father use padded ones:-)

      Jan 5, 2013 at 7:14 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • AmericanWolf
      AmericanWolf

      For all those saying the police should not have reported this you need to understand that for the past 150 years it has been “common practice” for police departments across the country to keep (and allow the community and press to view) a daily “blotter” which contains short (one to two paragraphs) summaries of ALL incidents that the police responded during the past 24 hour period. This is has traditionally been done because there is an acknowledged need for the public to be aware of criminal activity in their communities and what the police as “their” public servants are doing with their time on the job . To be fair, it wasn’t until the internet age that these blotters slowly became much more accessible to everyone (via Police websites). Now, police do have the ability to withhold posting names in cases such as rape, when children are involved or when a next of kin has not been notified about a death. But other than these types of cases names are routinely published. This falls under the heading if you don’t want people to know about your private business don’t engage in it publicly by calling the police when you get in a bind (bad pun intended), call the fire Department of a friend.

      Jan 5, 2013 at 8:40 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • 2eo
      2eo

      @Joetx: Indeed, when they want to constantly go on about homosexuality, single parents and how women are slaves but won’t do anything about the tens of thousands of child rapes carried out every single year by cathloics the wold over.

      It isn’t schadenfreude, it’s a good laugh at pathetic hypocrisy from pathetic people.

      Jan 5, 2013 at 8:52 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Dennis Velco
      Dennis Velco

      Nice.

      Thanks for this article and your reporting. What you do is appreciated.

      I posted it to my LGBT Group on LinkedIn with over 17,000 global members to spur members to read your article and to make comment. I also scooped it at Scoop.It on my LGBT Times news mashup.

      Link to group >> http://www.linkedin.com/groups/LGBT-Gay-GLBT-Professional-Network-63687/about

      All LGBT+ and community allies…. please come join me and 17,000+ of your soon to be great connections on LinkedIn. The member base represents 80% of the world’s countries.

      It’s core value is – Visibility can lead to awareness which can lead to equality. Come stand with us and increase our visibility on the globe’s largest professional networking site. Be a professional who just happens to be LGBT – or a welcomed community ally

      Jan 5, 2013 at 2:47 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Billp
      Billp

      God works in mysterious ways…
      or
      Ahh, another “Mysterious of the Church!”

      Jan 14, 2013 at 2:38 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

    Add your Comment

    Please log in to add your comment

    Need an account? Register It's free and easy.



  • POPULAR ON QUEERTY

    FOLLOW US
     



    GET QUEERTY'S DAILY NEWSLETTER


    FROM AROUND THE WEB

    !-- Sailthru Horizon -->
    Copyright 2014 Queerty, Inc.
    Follow Queerty at Queerty.com, twitter.com/queerty and facebook.com/queerty.