Oh Madonna, what are you doing?
We get that ageism is pervasive, yadda yadda, but Her Majesty the Queen of Pop made an appearance last night on the Tonight Show With Jimmy Fallon that left us scratching our heads whether she’s 26 or 56.
Or maybe you’ll think it’s “flawless,” as it’s being described elsewhere.
First there’s this Diplo-produced sonic mess of “Bitch I’m Madonna” off her new album, bringing to the stage a kind of frenetic chaos usually reserved for 3 a.m. dance floors:
How about we take this to the next level?
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And while she’s trying out dub step, why not give other new things a try, like stand-up comedy? Because if you didn’t notice, bitch, she’s Madonna. You’ll want to strap in for this awkwardness:
Her saving grace was this classroom instrument rendition of “Holiday,” though the credit really goes to The Roots and Fallon:
https://youtu.be/as-SALpccd8
Auryn Smith
Bitter queens. That song is great, and she’s been in the industry long enough to know what she’s doing.
Patrick Vincent
Haters gonna hate!
Manakin Taylor
That performance was everythang!!!
Cam
Oh Crap, a Madonna post.
This means there will now be 100 posts with Lady Gaga fans and Madonna fans bitching at each other. LOL
Paul Doumanis
Song is good and she finally got rid of those tight curls. LEAVE ESTHER ALONE!
Aaron Cash
Whoever wrote that article is damaged. Bitter party of one!
Caine
Leave Madonna alone!!!
lykeitiz
Ha! Sorry Queerty, looks like you’re alone on this one.
Yes, her standup left a bit to be desired (like her acting), but BOTH performances were flawless!
You’ve been called “bitter” twice in just 7 comments. Perhaps you should watch it again, without Gaga in the room!
cflekken
People obviously don’t get it. She’s on Fallon to NOT take herself so seriously. For the author(s) not to know the difference is really pathetic at this stage of her career.
Heather Fuglevik
No
Realitycheck
Great performance, Madonna did a better dancing routine on this song then on Living for for love.
Now I would like to see how many of the vitriol queens would have the courage to go on national TV
and do some live comedy……zero, the woman is fearless.
TemptyK
Bitch can’t sing to save her old wrinkled bimbo life. Old creaky pussy! The mere sight of her churns my gut!
robi2001
I agree with you, Queerty. Absolutely terrible. Only bitter queens are the ones defending her.
silveroracle
Re. Standup. Don’t give up the day job Madge.
We still love your songs.
Realitycheck
@TemptyK:
Not enough churning to keep you off this tread……… wink wink ….
Realitycheck
@robi2001:
Define bitter, since only a bitter queen would use that word, while an
emotionally balanced and socially adjusted adult can easily find other way to make his/her point.
robi2001
When I looked it up on Merriam-Webster, this came up: Realitycheck. 😉
Realitycheck
@Aaron Cash:
>>Whoever wrote that article is damaged. Bitter party of one!
Or two looking at this tread, LOL
jason smeds
Madonna still wears her hair long. I think she wants to look 25, not 57. Kind of strikes me as if she’s insecure about her looks. At her age, women who wear their hair long are tragic.
Uppity
Although the stand-up comedy didn’t quite work, the Bitch I’m Madonna routine did, because it was so frenetic and ridiculous it was like a send up. The song itself is absolutely atrocious. I can’t believe she wants to release it as her third single. She’s locked into an old image of herself as a badass sexual exhibitionist, which veers close to self parody these days. That shtick has been so done by her; it’s like she came out the other side of it with Ray of Light, but has reverted to it presumably because she wants the attention.
jason smeds
Hasn’t the word “bitch” been done to death in songs? LOL.
If that is the level of the vocabulary of Madonna these days, no wonder she’s tanking.
robi2001
@Realitycheck: poor Realitycheck, so desperate.
leopoldbuttersstotch
@jason smeds: What a ridiculous comment. Are you saying all women pass a certain age should start wearing their hair like Angela Merkel? Somebody tell Stevie Nicks, Cher, Cyndi and Tina Turner that before they get labeled as “tragic” by some unknown troll on a gay website.
jason smeds
Oh, please, Madonna simply can’t face her age. She rabbits on about ageism and yet she’s the most ageist person around. She doesn’t appear to date men her own age, she puts on lots of make-up to disguise her wrinkles…pathetic. She’s a pathetic has-been.
Her long hair is symptomatic of American women who can’t face their advancing years.
Uppity
In her awkward stand-up “comedy” routine, she unwittingly revealed a sad truth; that her relentless pursuit of men less than half her age comes to naught because she has the wealth and life experience and they do not.
Bob LaBlah
Madonna, honey, if you are reading this I hope you will get some comfort in my say that to this day I still don’t find Roseanne Barr funny nor see what was so special about her.
oilburner
Ok VADGE was pretty fucken funny I enjoyed her set.
Danny Severino
She’s trying to make a point that she can act 26, and she’s right were only old in our bodies..were all young in our heads & at heart 🙂 stay to music thou hone 😉 x
jason smeds
I don’t know if Madonna is doing Botox or having her facial skin pulled back but it’s becoming quite severe. Gone is the softness. Sure, with age, the skin becomes harder but something else has happened to make her look like a cross between a Russian housewife and a Hong Kong stall trader.
McShane
@jason smeds: Shut up, Meg.
Kevin Chang
Be gentle to the diva..
hex0
Who let madonna out the retirement home?
Daniel Alvarado
im sorry i love her new songs
o.codone
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5-VypWecJzI
Robert Wilson
Can she just go quietly? God…
Cam
I finally heard the Howard Stern interview with her. It was the first time I’ve ever thought she sounded interesting in an interview. She usually has her guard so far up, and he broke right through it. Not bad, and I have to admit, the songs they played sounded great.
Bob LaBlah
@o.codone: I was thinking she could do a remake of What Ever Happened to Baby Jane. She would be perfect for the part.
Cee
As someone who likes Madonna I will admit the song is weird for her. It doesn’t sound like her. If I heard it on the radio and it didn’t say “Bitch I’m Madonna” I wouldn’t know who the hell was singing. She has a very distinct voice and this song doesn’t capture it at all. I think the beat is dope and the performance was hot but that’s not Madonna.
ParisHiltonsBadEye
Grandma better check her uterus for pelvic organ prolapse.