An Argentine shepherd was found dead in his home after having sex with a straw-stuffed scarecrow that he had dressed up in a wig, lipstick, and a rubber strap-on dildo, the Daily Mirror reports.
58-year-old Jose Alberto’s rotting remains were discovered by police after neighbors of reported a foul stench wafting from his home.
Police say they were stunned when they found the man decomposing next to to a scarecrow that had been dressed up as a woman but wearing a rubber strap-on dildo.
Rodolfo Moure, a spokesman for the prosecutor, said he initially thought there were two bodies lying there, “but then I realized one was a scarecrow wearing lipstick and a long-haired wig.”
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“It was lying next to the deceased,” Moure continued, “and had a six-inch strap-on penis.”
Police say there were no signs of violence and so they are working on the assumption that Alberto died whilst in the throes of passion with the scarecrow.
“We are now waiting the results of an autopsy,” Mourse said.
Neighbors have described Alberto as “a loner” who lived by himself and had no mobile phone.
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Damon Robbins
and I suppose Dorothy and the Tin man where watching ?
David Sutton
Deliver me!!!
Captain Obvious
Clearly a hate crime being covered up by “police”, give me a break. How exactly do you just up and die by attaching a dildo to an inanimate object?
And why would he do it this way instead of in the privacy of his own home? It’s clearly murder and a group did it.
Not like this hasn’t been done many times before. But I guess he won’t be held up on a pedestal like Matthew Shepard because he’s not the right “face” for the poster.
Roland Hamburger
Wtf seriously! Omg
onthemark
It’s disturbing that Queerty considers this “gay” news. Is any incident that involves a dildo “gay” news?
But I think John Mellencamp wrote a song about this once.
Giancarlo85
Darwin Awards.
Stache99
He dies next to a scarecrow with a stap on. Big deal.
Masc Pride
@onthemark: I think it’s because the scarecrow was a tr@nny.
Allan O'Shea
That’s really sad.
Kiba Hagane
Dios mio!! Hi rest of the world, i assure you that its not a tradition around here
Saint Law
@Captain Obvious: Oh lol!Absolute lol!
Realitycheck
So what is autopsy supposed to reveal?
He had some straws stuck up his ass?
And are the going to put the Scarecrow on the witness stand?
NoCagada
Well, I hope he was “properly clean”
NoCagada
OMG! The christians were right…gay marriage…man with man…woman with woman…man with scarecrow in drag…
Captain Obvious
@Saint Law: Not sure what’s funny. There have been many men who were labeled “gay” even if they weren’t and strung up or murdered and dumped somewhere before.
Do you really think this man dressed a scarecrow up like a woman and strapped a dildo on it to self pleasure himself?
If so I’ve got a bridge to sell you in San Francisco. It’s scary how many people actually believe this to be true without a question.
How exactly do you die pegging yourself with a dildo? You don’t. Humiliation scene and dead body. Pretty clear he didn’t set this up himself and the “police” won’t investigate… hardly a new situation either.
DarkZephyr
This is a story I could have lived without reading.
DarkZephyr
But I guess I have only myself to blame for clicking on it despite the headline.
Ruhlmann
The tin man commented “I just can’t get my brain around this” and the cowardly lion added “scary, really scary”.
Matti Jabberwocky
what the hell hahahahaha
Ron Parsons
Medical Examiner’s report list the cause of death as “severe stupidity, complicated by a boll-weevil infestation of the penis”….
Realitycheck
@Captain Obvious: You are most likely right, I am sure I am not
the only that suspected could play, the scarecrow as some kind of message.
But, you have to admit it is a funny story, with a deda body in it, but funny.
Realitycheck
@Realitycheck:
that was “foul play” not, could play.
1EqualityUSA
corny
Captain Obvious
@Realitycheck: About as funny as Matthew Shepard I suppose. I don’t really find death and possible murder funny. Which humiliation scenes are usually set up when someone is “queer” or suspected of being “queer”.
There are way too many stories like this to laugh at it and write it off but since the victim wasn’t the right color no one seems to care.
1EqualityUSA
You’ve got a point Cap’n.
Cee
lol Best getcha mind right.