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Maybe Vander Plaats, Santorum, And Bachmann Were Right: Slaves Had It Pretty Good!

Child rapist Michelle Bachmann and fecal lube Rick Santorum both signed The FAMiLY LEADER’s pledge opposing porn, abortion, divorce, sex with more than one person ever during your entire life, and supporting American slavery because after all, at least back then black kids had a greater likelihood of being raised in a two-parent household.

And you know what? Maybe they’re right!

At least Baratunde Thurston, cofounder of Jack & Jill Politics, sarcastically thinks so:

“Why stop at two-parent households? Let’s celebrate the free housing, healthcare and meal plan offered to every black slave! You know what else slavery did for black people? Exercise! Oh it was just great! We even got to work outside. Speaking of work, today, African-American unemployment is over 16 percent. In Milwauke, Wisc., over one-third of black men are unemployed. But during slavery times, every black man had a job! See? Things were better in the past, and now things are bad. Ah, the good old days…”

Bob Vander Plaat’s organization The FAMiLY LEADER has since removed the slavery mention from the pledge and Bachmann claims she didn’t read the slavery part (even though it was the first bullet point in the entire whopping four-page document… Presidential candidates can’t be bothered with nit-picky things like literacy). Meanwhile, “Santorum indicated that he had in fact read the document carefully“—there’s a good boy.

Of course, most of the serious GOP Presidential candidates wish it was 1690 again when America’s black families had goodhearted caretakers and the only problem were those pesky Native Americans squatting on our land!

By:           Daniel Villarreal
On:           Jul 11, 2011
Tagged: , , , , , ,

  • 34 Comments
    • Abirdwillingtobeitself
      Abirdwillingtobeitself

      If someone as open minded as McCain couldn’t win in 2008, couldn’t hope to wipe away the shame of GWB, none of these ass-backwards clowns can win in 2012.

      Jul 11, 2011 at 9:38 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David Ehrenstein
      David Ehrenstein

      They’ve changed their minds about slavery a tad — at the last minute

      http://fablog.ehrensteinland.com/2011/07/10/fait-diver-get-me-rewrite/

      Jul 11, 2011 at 9:50 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • gregger
      gregger

      I’m certain that one of the asswipes from the RethugliKKKan party will comment on this post and the response. You know that you’re doing something right when those morons take the time out of attempts to gut civilians out their rights and military personnel out of their benefits. While we’re at it, look at how many people the Republican governors, county, and city executives have put out of work in attempts to boost the un-employment rate. Look at it from any angle when the RethugliKKKans keep saying jobs and cost are the issues at hand. Then they don’t negotiate costs or re-negotiate contracts, they just lay off people it tends to make people wonder how true they are to their words.

      Jul 11, 2011 at 9:52 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • TMikel
      TMikel

      Lord a mercy, child, we all know how wonderful life was in antebellum southern states! And just think of the additional “perks” of slavery! Why job transfer was easy – you just got sold to another owner. And the incentives to work hard – whipping, branding, slave collars – a lovely fashion accessory that, though made of iron not leather – clothing given free twice a year. Why it boggles the mind. Of course in that era women were also seen as chattel – something the right wingnuts conveniently forget – especially when they are women. Things were so much better in the good old days. Actually, I am appalled that someone who things he or she should run our country signs something without a thorough reading and understanding of it. But that is politics in 2011 – get the sound bytes and don’t worry about the substance – you can always backtrack later and apologize. Idiots!

      Jul 11, 2011 at 9:52 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • hf2hvit
      hf2hvit

      VAnder Plops looks like Hitler without the moustache.

      Jul 11, 2011 at 10:05 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • hf2hvit
      hf2hvit

      http://www.spreadingsantorum.com/

      Jul 11, 2011 at 10:06 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • KipEsquire
      KipEsquire

      FAMiLY Leader has removed the slavery text.

      http://www.slate.com/blogs/weigel/2011/07/11/happiness_in_slavery.html

      Jul 11, 2011 at 10:44 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Steve
      Steve

      Really? How is it humanly possible to be THIS stupid?

      Obama’s got 2012 in the bag.

      Jul 11, 2011 at 10:58 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jeffree
      Jeffree

      It’s interesting to note that Bachmann signed the pledge *before* the “pro-slavery” language was removed. Does that say more about her reading comprehension or about her views on slavery?

      Note: the small “i” in FAMiLY LEADER is intentional: an effort to show that the “i” (i.e. individual) doesn’t really count as much as the unit (family) — well, especially if that “i” refers to the womenfolk & the children.

      Jul 11, 2011 at 11:02 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jim
      Jim

      @TMikel: “Actually, I am appalled that someone who things he or she should run our country signs something without a thorough reading and understanding of it.” – QFT

      Jul 11, 2011 at 12:08 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • tjr101
      tjr101

      Michelle Bachmann is actually leading in the polls for the GOP primary in Iowa which goes to show the looniness the GOP base. Poor Romney, apparently the social cons just can’t stomach than mormon issue but they’re certainly tolerant of a slavery loving candidate!

      Jul 11, 2011 at 12:25 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Queer Supremacist
      Queer Supremacist

      They want to bring back slavery. I agree with them. Heterosexuals should be bought and sold as property. They’re only good for one thing: producing more gay people. Since they think marriage is just a means of baby farming, why not treat them like the animals they are. Michelle Bachmann’s slave name could be Cunta Kraute.

      If we can’t do that, then let’s secede from the union and form the Gay States of America.

      We need a gay dictator and we need it now.

      Jul 11, 2011 at 12:30 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • christopher di spirito
      christopher di spirito

      Bachmann and Santorum are proof the GOP/Tea Party is devoid of any moral conscious.

      Jul 11, 2011 at 12:42 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Cam
      Cam

      The BEST part about this story…is that under pressure from the OTHER republican candidates, the group had to REMOVE the slavery language. So NOW Bachman and Santorum are having to explain why that language WASN’T an issue for them and why they signed the pledge. LOL!!

      I Love it, Michelle had such a clit woody for the anti-gay language that she probably didn’t even bother to notice the scortching racism in the document. Either that or she is such a racist that the language didn’t seem unusual.

      Jul 11, 2011 at 12:57 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Riker
      Riker

      @christopher di spirito: Bachmann and Santorum are proof the GOP and Tea Party is devoid of a moral *consensus*. The GOP is not a unified, monolithic thing, nor is the tea party. I find it telling that only three of the candidates signed it and the rest chose not to (including the frontrunner, Mitt Romney).

      Jul 11, 2011 at 1:17 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Joe
      Joe

      @Riker: I’m going to go out on a limb here and suggest that Christopher meant to say “…is devoid of any moral conscience.”

      Jul 11, 2011 at 2:13 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jeffree
      Jeffree

      It’s amazing how comments that do not violate any part of TOS get put into “moderation” but comments that are obviously spam slide right through.

      Anyway, I made a post at 11:02 a.m. & perhaps someone will revise the filter or the TOS so they’re at least consistent w/ each other. And yes, I realize that’s a lot of work.

      Jul 11, 2011 at 2:48 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • TheRealMannequinAdam
      TheRealMannequinAdam

      @Jeffree: You’re just too hot to handle, sweetie ;). Too much of a good thing is never healthy. Thus, the moderation.

      Jul 11, 2011 at 3:01 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • christopher di spirito
      christopher di spirito

      @Riker: Good point. 2012 is Romney’s to win or lose.

      With 9.2% unemployed or 17 million, and real unemployment probably closer to 22%, I think Romney could very well defeat Obama. Americans are desperate for jobs.

      Jul 11, 2011 at 3:19 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • B
      B

      In No. 13 · Cam wrote, “The BEST part about this story…is that under pressure from the OTHER republican candidates, the group had to REMOVE the slavery language. So NOW Bachman and Santorum are having to explain why that language WASN’T an issue for them and why they signed the pledge. LOL!! I Love it, Michelle had such a [explicative deleted] for the anti-gay language that she probably didn’t even bother to notice the scortching racism in the document. Either that or she is such a racist that the language didn’t seem unusual.”

      http://thinkprogress.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/The-Family-Leader-Presidential-Pledge.pdf has the actual document they accepted. What is stated is that “Unmistakeably, the Institution of Marriage in America is in great crisis: * Slavery had a disastrous impact on African American families, yet sadly a child born into slavery in 1860 was more likely to be raised by his mother and father in a two-parent household than was an African-American baby born after the election of the USA’s first African-American President. * ….” The statement cites http://www.americanvalues.org/pdfs/consequences_of_marriage.pdf as its source, but that second article doesn’t seem to back up the claim (did a search for the words ‘slavery’ and ’1860′ but didn’t read the whole thing carefully, so please feel free to try if you have the time).

      In any case, saying that one particular measure is worse now than it was under slavery is not a racist statement if the intention was to criticize the government for neglect. It was, however, a sentence that could be easily misquoted by eliminating a key phrase, and a politician should have been aware of that risk (honesty is a virtue that current American political discourse lacks).

      Jul 11, 2011 at 3:53 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Right Wingers Are Socioptahs (John From England)
      Right Wingers Are Socioptahs (John From England)

      @christopher di spirito:

      Yeah, the GOP did such a good job for 8 years that they lumbered Obama with this BUT again, they are the only people to make it right.

      Heck, why bother looking at history or the past to understand the present as to not repeat the mistakes?

      Funny thing is that Obama’s economic crew is made of of……..ex Bush cronies. Ah, don’t you LOVE politics?

      Jul 11, 2011 at 4:41 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Mal Tempo
      Mal Tempo

      Two parents households in slavery? Families were rent apart, and children sold separately.

      Jul 11, 2011 at 4:56 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Riker
      Riker

      @christopher di spirito: Bachmann could have an outside shot at the nomination, but she’s such a clown that she has no chance in the general election. I think Mitt Romney is the only one that really stands a chance of defeating Obama.

      According to the latest available polling data, Romney could win the key states of Iowa, New Hampshire (traditionally a blue state), Florida, Nevada, North Carolina and Pennsylvania. Thse all went red in 2004 and blue in 2008, and for many of the polls Romney is the only Republican who can win.

      Jul 11, 2011 at 5:16 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • christopher di spirito
      christopher di spirito

      @Riker: Michelle “Crazy Eyes” Bachmann scares the GOP establishment. I don’t see her winning the nomination. This is Romney’s turn. And watch him put Sen. Marco Rubio on the ticket.

      Jul 11, 2011 at 7:13 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Haightmale
      Haightmale

      This Iowa marriage pledge is just further proof that Bachmann is a submissive bottom.

      http://haightmale.blogspot.com/2011/07/bachmann-outed-submissive-bottom.html

      Jul 11, 2011 at 7:36 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • PLAINTOM
      PLAINTOM

      Romney had better not write that acceptance speech for the Republican Convention just yet. Rick Perry is making a lot of noise in Texas and appears to be considering and a run.

      Jul 11, 2011 at 8:35 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • james_from_cambridge
      james_from_cambridge

      @christopher di spirito: Americans are desperate for jobs so they’re gonna elect Romney, a man who made his millions LAYING PEOPLE OFF??

      Jul 12, 2011 at 1:30 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • james_from_cambridge
      james_from_cambridge

      And where oh where are the lovely Gopproud self-loathing shills who are usually here defending any and all right-wing rants and/or racism? C’mon boys, I know you’re out here ready to troll, though I do admit this one is gonna be hard for you to twist around to your advantage. But I’m sure you’ll try. Pigs.

      Jul 12, 2011 at 1:33 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Mary Denny
      Mary Denny

      @christopher di spirito: Tell the big corporations to bring our jobs back from oversees and South America!!!!

      Jul 12, 2011 at 5:29 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • The Realist
      The Realist

      @PLAINTOM: You think Bachmann is crazy? Wait til you get our “Beloved”{sarcasm) Gov. “Good hair” Perry, in the mix. If the lame stream media will do it’s job, Perry’s antics will rival if not surpass anything “crazy eyes” bachmann has. Problem is, the Tea Party loves him.

      Here in Texas, we don’t hide our crazy in the attic. We bring out into the parlor and show it off

      Jul 12, 2011 at 8:22 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Riker
      Riker

      @james_from_cambridge: I’m a GOProud supporter, and I have no intention of defending this crap. I support Romney.

      Jul 12, 2011 at 11:27 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Patsy Stoned
      Patsy Stoned

      Riker, GoProud Mary that you are, if you support f-ing flip flopping shit-bag Romney you ARE supporting crap.

      Jul 12, 2011 at 11:11 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Riker
      Riker

      @Patsy Stoned: And how many politicians *aren’t* flip-flopping regularly?

      Jul 17, 2011 at 4:00 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • onlychief
      onlychief

      Why was Protestant Slavery the Smoking Gun of Civil War?
      The Civil War was the bloodiest war in American history. American Protestant slavery in the Constitution denied Blacks’ humanity and citizenship. Paul Kalra’s “From Slave To Untouchable: Lincoln’s Solution” shows how this inevitably led to Civil War and killing of 620,000 Americans.
      FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
      This is the 150th anniversary of Civil War that claimed 620,000 American lives. American Protestant slavery in the Constitution denied Blacks’ humanity and citizenship. Chief Justice Roger B. Taney opined, “The framers of the Constitution had not regarded Negroes as citizens, and the present condition of the race warranted no change in their legal status.” Why was Protestant Slavery the smoking gun of the Civil war?
      “From Slave to Untouchable: Lincoln’s Solution” provides answers to:
      • Why the Blacks could not be set free outside the citizenship tent.
      • How breeding of Blacks for sale required slavery expansion into new territories.
      • Why immigrants from Europe were reluctant to compete with black noncitizens.
      “From Slave To Untouchable: Lincoln’s Solution” by Paul Kalra (ISBN 978-0-9647173-6-7) has endorsements:
      • A foreword by Congressman Jesse L. Jackson, Jr.
      • Hailed by Harold Holzer, editor of the New York Times Civil War series, “Your project is intriguing and original and provocative.”
      • Stanley M. Elkins, History Professor, “A very persuasive case for the unique character of American (Protestant) slavery and its implications for the status of American blacks right down to twentieth century.”

      A press-kit is available at http://www.SlaveToUntouchable.com .
      ###
      Contact Information:
      Tina Singh Email: OnlyChief@hotmail.com

      Aug 8, 2011 at 9:29 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

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