Have we entered The Twilight Zone? Sure, we know the military's fucked up and all, but we're really disturbed by the news that the amount of new recruits with criminal records has jumped 65% over the past three years. So, basically our government's more inclined to put a gun in the hand of felon than a faggot. We feel safer already!

Of the report, Aaron Belkin had this to say:

For all its insistence that letting gays serve openly would be an unacceptable risk to the military – even if they haven't engaged in "homosexual conduct" – the Pentagon bends over backwards to create exceptions in the case of ex-convicts, whose actual criminal behavior is defined by having created a disruption.
…
The military would be far better served if, instead of yielding to political expediency and moral animus, it better monitored and assisted recruits who really are prone to misbehavior, while taking a hard look at the data which show that allowing gays and lesbians to serve would improve the armed forces.

Or, of course, they could get rid of both cocksucker and criminals and replace them all with dolphins.