Pharma-bro Martin Shkreli turned 33 yesterday and to celebrate he threw himself a party.
Literally. Just himself. He was the only person in the room.
Since he doesn’t have any friends in real life, Shkreli invited his Twitter followers to join him for the celebration via webcam:
https://twitter.com/MartinShkreli/status/710665145429659648
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The shindig was held on the the platform Blab Beta, where Shkreli regularly streams live chats with anyone who wants to drop in an say hi, and it included a cake with a picture of a $100 bill with his face on it:
https://twitter.com/MartinShkreli/status/710600421564420096
The price-gouging douche, who was recently hexed by a coven of New York witches, told followers that he is excited to be turning 33, comparing it to the human gestation process:
https://twitter.com/MartinShkreli/status/710516753047146497
The whole thing is so incredibly sad that we almost feel sorry for Shkreli.
Almost.
Related: Martin Shkreli Resents Being Labeled “Pharma Bro,” Says You’re All Just A Bunch Of Haters
1EqualityUSA
I wish this guy could turn it around. It can’t be fun. Shkreli, just admit you were a dork and turn it around. Life will become less toxic and more fun.
Stache
@1EqualityUSA: That must be why he’s always smiling. It’s really just a cry out for help. Lol
trell
Most millionaire playboy douchebags wouldn’t bother streaming a birthday online. They’d just go off to some nice holiday destination with some whores and bags of cocaine.
This looks more and more like some publicity stunt. What did he think the reaction was going to be? People would suddenly feel sorry for his one-man party or nod in appreciation of his $100 birthday cake?
Why are we even giving this guy the attention? He’s a loser! He did something stupid, and rather than just apologising and doing the right thing, he’s shouting “Look at MEEEE!”….and more fool us for looking!
Well, I hope that next year, he does have more people who will help him celebrate his 34th…..big, hairy, mean dudes with tattoos and about 30-to-life sentences. I’m sure they’ll help a fellow con celebrate his birthday, especially if he’s got a purdy mouth.
Billy Budd
He makes me wanna vomit.
LubbockGayMale
This man is the PeeWee Herman of Wall Street; not the child-like character, but the dirty old man hanging around the boys restrooms.
Tony Chaplinski
with that crappy slap your face grin———trump junior
GC1985
Did he make that cake himself? How about he posts “let them eat cake”. Marie Antoinette style.
Stached1
Is he going to play his expensive Wu Tang album he bought for lots of money on vinyl?
Dylan Walker
Umm eww
captainburrito
Like Kim Davis & Donald Trump, can we just starve them of attention?
Kevin J Desmond
Why is that worthless sub-human piece of garbage still in the news ?
DCguy
He isn’t doing anything different than any other Pharma CEO. He was just more obvious about it. That is why Congress didn’t do anything to him in spite of them claiming they would. Any law they passed would keep the other drug companies from stealing as well.
paul dorian lord fredine
tweeted the cake was sent ‘by friends’. no, friends are people who would actually bring it and hang around to share it. ‘friends’ who simply send it are telling you ‘we just wanted to be polite but, sorry, we can’t stand to be in the same room as you.’
Philippe Bourgoin
Have a CRAPPY Birthday S.O.B!!
Daniel Moroni
Don’t feel bad, I didn’t either. But happy birthday.
Daniel Moroni
David Barenz
I’d like to sit down with him. Really.
TampaZeke
@1EqualityUSA: Your comment is offensive to dorks. This douchebag isn’t a dork; he’s an ASSHOLE! Big difference. Of course, I just offended assholes.
1EqualityUSA
ahhh ok TampaZeke, dorks everywhere deserve my most heartfelt apologies. How do you keep an asshole in suspense? I’ll tell you tomorrow. These are the jokes the lad will tell in prison, hoping to befriend his new roommates. Even a smile, with dead eyes, is not a smile. He looks miserable. I wish he would just knock it off. Pathological?
Gary McGonigle
He has no friends or even people his money can buy.
Brent Labee
he doesn’t have to hire a clown
Tim Parker
Publicity stunt successful thanks to queerty.
James Penny
Hope he had the worst Birthday ever!!!
Edson Mejia
Lol people still hating on him? You must read only what media says.
Magnus
@1EqualityUSA: I hate to burst your bubble dude, but you can’t fix psychopaths. Sadly there is no cure as of yet, but I hope we one day come up with a cure, not only for their sakes, but ours as well.
Mark Jenkins
Would someone please off this weasel?
1EqualityUSA
Magnus, This explains Romney. (Sociopath.) How did the crazy person get out of the woods? He took the psychopath. These are the jokes Mittens will tell at the contested convention, in order to befriend his riotous Trumpees. Even a smile, with fake eyes, is not a smile. Give me an “O.” Give me a “B.” Give me an “S-O-L-E-T-E!”
Timothy Warner
Mr. Shkreli, should be very careful about what he says.
Christopher DeRosa
You REALLY think he partied by himself? I hope he finds this article and laughs at all of you! He’s not as dumb or douchy as you think!
Bob LaBlah
I wish I had his mailing address. I have a few bucks laying around and I would have loved to send him a chocolate cake in the shape of a turd or an ex-lax tablet. I doubt if he would get the hint behind it though.
I bet when the truth finally comes out it will turn out to be those he worked with every day who supplied the investigators everything the needed to fine his ass into the poor house where he belongs.
David Morris
During the party.I hope he raised his glass to toast the suffering he caused. Carma is a thing.
youarekiddingme
@Bob LaBlah: Sorry Bob…a little correction. A cake made WITH EX-LAX! A couple of boxes of Ex-Lax! It might help clean out the little shit?
Bob LaBlah
@youarekiddingme: That was funny. But I think it safe to say a cake made of such (ex-lax) might cause who ever baked and delivered to wind up as his cellmate. Its best to do it the Betty Crocker way so all can get a good laugh.
And by the way, be sure to mail fruitcakes to people you don’t like at Christmas time. My list has whittled down to seven. And the good things about it is they don’t get it. And they ALL hate that damn cake too.
GC1985
@TampaZeke: Your comment is offensive to assholes lol.
This guy is lower than scum.
Yes other big pharm CEOs might do similar things, but not to this degree.
GC1985
@Bob LaBlah: The guy isn’t worth the postage stamp.