(440): just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
(515): does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
(949): youre so sexy i want your bod
(410): dude, did you turn gay?
(949): heather?
(410): this is jacob
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so glad you put the pot chocolate-covered cherries… that's my favorite text by far.
I hate reading the comments though, people are such homophobes
HAHA!!! I nearly spit my tea all over my laptop!! Some of these things are HILARIOUS!!!
I love the "I'm totally gay for Miss California/Sweet irony" bit…
(561): At a straight bar and poker face just came on…must…resist….urge to gay it up
(915): Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
***TOO TRUE
and best text by far..
why would 2 girls be giving a gay guy head? Doesn't GAY mean you only like guys? Creepy….
(870): do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
(1-870): well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
(870): what chic?
That's so classic.
OMG, the 3-way one had me on the floor!!! (e.g., "What chic?")