• Leave it to Michael Lucas to give us a reason to buy the video iPod. Madonna videos and porn in our pockets? Flawless.

• Someone please help Toby fix his website. We kinda miss him. Kinda.

• The B Squad sends you a Happy Halloween. It’s funny, but sadly features no anal sex like their last video.

• Bush nominates extremist Samuel A. Alito Jr. to the Supreme Court. We normally would be all bent out of shape, but we have a costume to hot-glue gun together. And that is so much more important.

• Gerard Depardieu is ending his acting career. Um, didn’t he ten years ago?