In a great move for companies Montblanc and Dunder Mifflin, opponents to the passage of Maine's same-sex marriage law have gathered the necessary 55,087 signatures required to put a repeal up for a statewide vote. The marriage equality bill, signed in May by Gov. John Baldacci, has not yet gone into effect; that is to come in September. But the law will be put on hold once the signatures collected by Stand for Marriage Maine — the organization led by Mark Mutty that spearheaded the signature drive — are certified. As Gilly would say: sorry.

Here's a novel idea: While the Dan Chois of the world can run around America insisting openly gay soldiers are good for the country, how about some openly straight soldiers running around America insisting, uh, the same thing?

So Massachusetts' Attorney General Martha Coakley is suing something called the United States of America over the Defense of Marriage Act, specifically challenging the definition of marriage as that one man-one woman business. Continued »

"I'm sorry, but there comes a point where there is no longer any difference in trying to play politics and actually being opposed to us. If Obama, plays politics to stay in power and so to keep that power never ever moves on our rights, that is no different from a politician that runs for office as an opponent of us. Continued »

In case you ever thought writing, calling, or emailing your representatives was a waste of time, take it from Steve Hildebrand, Barack Obama's openly gay deputy national campaign director: Continued »

GRATUITOUS SKIN — There's a reason why Tom Duer finds himself competing in fitness competitions: because he is ridiculously fit. But we'll take "regular clothes" over "modeling bikini" every time. (See what we mean on Page 11.) Continued »

The Austrian ambassador to Britain, Emil Brix, is calling for a boycott of Bruno … because of how Sacha Baron Cohen depicts nationals. Yeah? Continued »

Oh, you are not watching Bravo's latest ode to youthful wealthy navel-gazing? Then you will not care that NYC Prep's Peter Cary “PC” Peterson is the biggest (ethnically offensive) closet case on television right now. And we are including that CNN guy. (Video here.)

In his never-ending quest to prove he is not A Homosexual, former Anna Nicole Smith attorney Howard K. Stern sued former MSNBC host Rita Cosby over her book's allegations that Stern and Larry Birkhead (father of Smith's daughter) were gay lovers. It's a $60 million libel suit that involves dialogue about videotaped gay sex, which should make anyone erect. Continued »

Remember when George W.'s Attorney General Alberto Gonzales ignored sexual abuse allegations from Texas teens in a juvenile detention facility? And he tried to cover it up? And he went so far as to hint that maybe these young boys were actually enjoying it? It was something straight out of Sleepers. And it was — depending on whether you listen to Gonzales' supporters or detractors — among the reasons Gonzales resigned two years ago. (Some might say it was because Gonzales led the firing squad against anti-GOP U.S. attorneys.) But now Gonzo has found a new job. At a school. Of higher education. Continued »

You silly gays keep asking for gay magazines to put gay people on the cover, and now you're regretting it! Comes the obvious response from The Advocate: Love him or hate him, "there's no denying" that this "faggot" blogger reaches people.

"As he grew older and the more he started to change physically, the more asexual he became to me. It was easy for him to be a friend to me, because I was the most celebrated virgin ever; it's ridiculous, but I was America's virgin. Continued »

As the U.S. Senate returns to the business of arguing over budgets, the Servicemembers Legal Defense Network's Aubrey Sarvis says "all the Senators need do is pass an amendment to the Defense Department bill [that senators will be addressing] directing Secretary Gates to stop DADT investigations while Congress acts on full repeal" of Don't Ask Don't Tell. That's all they have to do to protect gay servicemen and women from being ousted! And then maybe senators can add a clause insisting unicorns play a game of musical chairs in front of the Capitol Building and demand leprechauns replenish the U.S. Treasury.

SOUNDBITES — "Obama needs to act. Occasionally peppering speeches with platitudes about tolerance toward gay people will do little to bring real change in the ways LGBT people experience discrimination. The proclamation from the president celebrating gay pride month rings hollow and feels meaningless. The benefits extension was weak and should not receive the applause of supposed LGBT leaders. These things are too little, too late. From this president, LGBT people receive very little empathy because it’s not convenient. His words on gay issues offer support on the one hand, and some unpleasantly familiar disdain for LGBT equality on the other. When it comes to action, this administration has gone from indifference to the active promotion of religious opposition to the rights of gay Americans, followed by weak attempts to appease us when we protested with our pocketbooks. At this point, we cannot honestly call this president a fierce advocate of gay rights. I’m afraid that we cannot even call him much of an ally." —Paul Gorrell, religious scholar and former Catholic priest, on the president's GLBT in-roads

When we asked yesterday whether President Obama was playing a two-faced frenemy with The Gays, we forgot to mention the obvious: Yes, yes he is. Continued »

Chad Gibson, the 26-year-old who ended up in the hospital after Ft. Worth police raided the Rainbow Lounge Stonewall-style, has been released from the hospital after six days in ICU. Recovery now begins: "The injury will likely keep him out of work for the next four to six weeks. He'll suffer severe headaches for the next two years, he said. Gibson is looking forward to recovering and returning back to work." On the plus side, he can use that time to mount a civil suit against the police department.

Sorry, the death of gay print media continues. Genre, Honcho the New York Blade, and now the lesser known five-year-old Labrys, Atlanta's lesbian rag, has closed. But the website will live on!

The porn biz — which the New York Times adorably describes as the "sex film industry" — is suffering a major void: plotlines. All you Internet users on The Xtubes watching racy skin flicks are doing so in three-minute segments, leaving no attention span for the intricate plot developments involving plumbers, pizza delivery guys, and cable repairmen.

Fox News comedian Bill O'Reilly is, like Sarah Palin, the gift that keeps on giving. While he pretends to be a serious news pundit, he has entered the realm of celebrity tabloid minstrelsy: He now employs body language "experts" to gauge the intents of politicians. Except his guest Tonya Reiman is, laughably, billed only as someone who "studied psychology and non-verbal communication," which is the equivalent of studying, well, astrology — if only because they're equally as accurate. Continued »

Rich Juzwiak — the hil-ar cutie behind FourFour, VH1's blog, and Jezebel.com's "get high and give advice" segments — is the best watcher of reality television in America. Continued »