What is the world coming to? First the AFA tries to take out Wal-Mart, now people are trying to take out Reichen and Lance! We always knew the future would be scary, but this is almost too much!
It seems Reichen’s “tell all” on the abuse of gays in the military has churned up the eternal ire of America’s militarily-inclined homophobes. Chatting with Inside Edition yesterday, Reichen said:
We have to be very protective…I am not going to hide. There are threats that come in from people who do not want me to be so public and expose what is going on in the military.
Of course he’s not going to hide! That would mean no more parties, photogs, and “fame”…
As a means of protecting themselves from their scores of enemies, Bass and Reichen have hired a security team and have passed the threats on to the FBI.
We suppose it’s not surprising that people have come out against Reichen’s book. What we’re more surprised by is the fact that the FBI would have any interest in protecting them. Aren’t there more pressing concerns in this country than a former boy-bander and his boyfriend?
How about we take this to the next level?
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Oh, and we’d like to point out that the headline (seen below) from our source reads ”
Bass and boyfriend get threats over book”. No matter how hard Reichen tries, he’ll always be second fiddle to Lancey the Nancy. Tear.
FizziekruntNT
WTF is up with Lance’s face? Is he THAT unphotogenic?
Ryan
I don’t know, Reichen is really growing on me. I never cared about Lance Bass and I probably never will, but I think Reichen’s got some potential for the cause. Out of the two of them, I think Reichen’s actually doing more.
Regardless, it’s nice to have a “celebrity couple” of gay men for everyone to look at. They should be appreciated for being willing to take on that much stalking – I mean press. If homophobic, yet otherwise intelligent people realize gay people can have normal relationships and we’re not all a bunch of loose fags destined for hell because “god hates us,” then it will serve our cause well. The more out couples there are, the better. (Hint, hint: I’m single =p)
spiffy
Re: Lance’s face
Fizzie, I think that’s the I’ve-got-myself-a-trophy-bf look that Mr. Bass is sporting…
Leland
It’s all your fault, oh Queerties! But it’s less likely the pro-camo/anti-homo crowd threatening Reichen and his sugar daddy than members of the American Language Association or even senior members of Oprah’s Book Club high on too many Little Debbie cakes. Now that you’ve revealed that he’s already working on a second book—what did you expect? It could even be the ghost of Truman Capote, who we’re sure would have described the former Bacardi Boy’s book the same way he described Jacqueline Susann’s: “That’s not writing; that’s typing.”
Actually, we charter Reichenettes have heard this soundtrack before [you do know that Reichen is less real than prerecorded?]. It was only about a year ago that he and his so-close-they-could-run-the-Bates-Motel mama were proving his VIP [Very Important Pansy] status by posting on his shrine, I mean Website about alleged threats he’d received then and, gasp, Mary, lock your legs together and bring in your Pussy, the FBI was on the tail, I mean trail. Such Lavender Alerts alternate with his periodic “My Lawyers Are Investigating All Those Nasty Things People Are Saying About Me” bulletins. [Check out the all caps warning before his fan forum which informs you that your IP address is being tracked by his mean gypsy aunt with the moustache in Cincinnati so don’t piss her off!] The quelle odd acid reflux of one of those was his announcement that his legal team on crack, I mean crack legal team [which has included a certain former male mayor with a former porn star husband] had allegedly advised him not to post things ON HIS OWN site. So anyone wanting to ingest his most current ejaculations, I mean epistles have to go to his myspace page. Why his writing there is more acceptable to his Fairy Masons we can’t even guess, but note Lance comes, you should pardon the expression, before Jesus in the “Reichen’s Friends” list. After all, fuck that water into wine shit! Who’s picking up the bills, Baby?
Of course, anyone can call Uncle Edgar’s boys, but does that mean they even take notes on what you say? And what color Post Its do they use? Or does “passed the threats to the FBI” only mean a slip of paper from one bathroom stall to the next? In any case, just because—even BL [Before Lance]—Little Reichen Loopy Loo was frequently flitting from cock-t0-coast for various vacuous red rug events and conjugal visits with his then True Love in La La Land [the Cuban car renter with the mucho grande plantain] and his then True Love in La Big Apple [the “personal trainer” with whom he modeled custom “Love & Pride & See Ya” rings]—did that adequately constitute “interstate commerce” to qualify for federal jurispenistion? Why didn’t he just grab his pink princess phone and call the local authorities? Or did someone cause him to wet his rooster Underooze with some e-mailed threat? On the other hand [the sticky one], given what a Natural Treasure his ass is we wouldn’t be surprised to learn that all those closeted gay Republicans in Congress passed a Reichen Amendment to the Patriot Act.
Strange that no “security team” was in sight last night when he was pimping, I mean signing books in San Francisco, though the Fashion Police should have been called. No wonder he’s been so successful in leading women to believe he’s not really gay—he has terrible taste in clothes. That patterned tie/patterned shirt/patterned sweater ensemble he wore to The Abbey bookaganza Monday night must have come from the fall Jim Belushi Collection.
Okay, sure, we believe he’s received threats [and not just from ex’es and the bank that holds the mortgage on his abandoned house]. But given that, sorry to break the news to him, he did not discover DADT and wasn’t the first gay person to publicly protest it [think Joe Steffan; think Barbra-produced TV movie with Glenn Close as Cammermeyer; think Leonard Matlovich TV movie even pre DADT], we seriously doubt if there have been any serious threats from the Don’t Drop the Soap Brigade. I’d raid *NSYNC fan club meetings first.
EVERYONE who’s in the public eye long enough gets threats—from politicians to Powerball winners; from Nobel Prize winners to the weatherman on WXYZ; from sports superstars to repeating Little League champs; from real actors to mere walking-head-shots-with-a-SAG-card like der Reiche. But few of them go off into the wild blue yonder, I mean to the press with melodramatic moaning about it. The difference is that people with more substance than surface don’t need to generate attention for themselves. But we’ve seen how Reichen’s appetite for it has only grown with every feeding. Throwing his legs in the air for someone with a paparrazi platinum card has finally thrown him into that sphere where just showing up is enough. Hollow-on-their-own buzz words like “rights” and “sex” and “love” and “passion” and “threats,” that have been falling out of his mouth like cracker crumbs for the last few years have finally stuck enough to get him continuing mainstream media attention. It might only be the kind that accepts a priori his latest smelly claim, but like his endless still pictures, now words and videocameras mirror his groundless belief in his own self-importance, and somewhere right now he’s probably fondling himself while re-watching the tape of his latest interview. Anna Nicole Smith and Anna Nicole Lehmkuhl now live in the same e-tainment universe; each starring in their own celebrity-as-porn creations. What will the next headline be for the shy little boy who only dreamed of flying and having his ears fixed one day: “Seriously Ill”? “Buys Fill In the Blank”? “Asks Lance to Marry Him”? Wants to Adopt”? Tune in tomorrow.