It seems pocket gays draw lots of positive attention when they step into a bar or circuit party, drawing packs of far bigger guys around them to the point where they disappear. Petite and small in stature, they often stand under 5’8, even in shoes.
Urban Dictionary defines the pocket gay as “an extremely short gay person.” Sean Hayes, in an episode of Will & Grace, once called them “the perfect travel-sized homosexual.” There seems to be some kind of correlation between diminutive stature and cuteness. These guys have adorable cheeks you just want to pinch.
Scroll down to see a sampling of celebrity men — some gay, some allegedly gay, and some we wish were gay — who have all the right makings to be excellent pocket gays…
Hunger Games star Josh Hutcherson is the epitome of a pocket gay. He’s short, he’s sweet, and he loves puppies. The 5’6 tease claims he’s straight, but last October he said he could “see himself dating a guy in the future.” Hey, Joshy boy, whenever you’re ready to take a dip in the man pond, give us a firstname.lastname@example.org.
Out country crooner Steve Grand made us reconsider our feelings about honky tonk music last summer with his song All American Boy. We’d love to pick up this brown-eyed beauty and carry him around for a decade or three. Until then, we’ll keep him on our iPods.
The 5’6 Hobbit star just turned 33 last month, and he’s cuter than ever. A few years back, rumors began swirling that he was gay. Turns out they weren’t true. Whomp, whomp. That’s okay, though. His compact frame, dramatic square jawline, and dreamy blue eyes still have us swooning.
Gay funny man Alec Mapa may not be traditional movie star handsome, but he’s still totally adorable. Not to mention he makes us laugh. Oh, and he knows how to rock a bow tie.
Bad boy Brent Everett is one of the hottest twinks in porn. But we know behind that oversexed exterior, there’s a sweet boy next door who would pack very well into our Levis, front or back pocket.
Bruno Mars denied gay rumors in the past, but we’re still including him on our list as an honorary pocket gay. The 5’5 singer still gets us every time with his 2011 song Marry You. And that hair! It adds several inches to his stature.
Jonathan Taylor Thomas (aka J.T.T.)
The ’90s heartthrob was once the primary object of our middle school fantasies. And when rumors that he might be gay surfaced, we just about died. Today he’s all grown up… Sort of. He never got past the 5’5 mark, which is partly why we still love him, even though he’s more or less retired from show biz. Here’s hoping for a comeback.
At 5’8, the metrosexual TV host is on the tall side for pocket-sized, but we’re including him anyway because he’s so darn cute, not to mention squeezable. The fact that he’s worth an oversized $250 million only adds to our admiration. Pocket that!
We first fell in love with the 5’7 Scientologist when he stripped down to his skivvies and shook his thang in Risky Business. He’s cute, he’s charismatic, and he knows how to move. Sure, he might be a little on the crazy side, but whatever. We’d put up with his crazy for a dose of his pocket-sized goodness any day.