Tomorrow marks the arrival of Spartacus: Vengeance, the newest chapter in Starz’ acclaimed action/drama franchise set in the world of ancient Greece Rome (although you can watch the first episode online now for free.) Seeing the ubiquitous trailers for the show (there’s probably one on your screen right now) made us cast our thoughts back to some of our favorite screen Olympians from years gone by. So we pulled together a veritable Who’s Who of toga-wearing, sword-wielding, arena-fighting hunks from the big and small screen.
Obviously this is a personal list—Russell Crowe in Gladiator did nothing for us, sorry. Who’s your favorite oiled-up Greco-Roman? Thrust thy mighty saber into the comment section!
Click through for photos of film and television’s hottest gladiators
Spartacus: Vengeance debuts January 27 at 10pm on Starz. Photo: Starz
Frank Miller’s 300 took homoeroticism to dizzying new heights. Our straight buddies still can’t explain why they’re obsessed with this movie.
Kevin Sorbo in Hercules was the reason we raced home after detention in junior high (and we don’t run anywhere). But the show put us in a real quandry: Did we want Herc to wind up with our fave ass-kicking warrior princess, Xena, or his lanky blond sidekick Iolaus.
Troy didn’t have much going for it, in all honesty. We mean, Brad Pitt is a hunk even with a long blond perm, but he’s about as believable as Greek hero Achilles as Marcus Bachmann does as a happily married man.
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Eric Bana gets a grip in Troy
You might not know who Steve Reeves is, but your gay uncle probably does. Reeves was the original cinematic beefcake idol in movies like Hercules Unchained (above). These low-budget European flick were dubbed in Italian, but we don’t think anyone watched them to hear Reeves’ voice.
In 1981’s Clash of the Titans‘ sexy Harry Hamlin bucked the trend of broad-chested he-men as Greco-Roman action stars, giving us a loin-clothing wearing twink who slays the monster, saves the girl and rides off into the sunset—on a flying horse. Gaaaay!
Okay, we admit it. We still haven’t watch HBO’s Rome, even though the show ended, what, three years ago? Looking at stills like these, though, we might move it up on our Netflix queue.
Seeing Rome‘s James Purefoy like this makes us glad they didn’t have indoor plumbing in ancient times.
In his later days, Charlton Heston became a right-wing gun nut. But back in his prime, he played a hunky Hebrew slave who tussled with the Romans in Ben-Hur.
If you think watching 2011’s Immortals would be like reading Edith Hamilton’s seminal Mythology, you’d be wrong. But, packed with marble-carved Adonises like Kellan Lutz, it should still be required viewing.
Before Kellan Lutz was even a twinkle in his daddy’s eye, Kirk Douglas originated the role of Spartacus in Stanley Kubrick’s classic film from 1960. He’s a little too wiry for our tastes, but we’re dying to know what he was packing in that loincloth.
Lastly, we tip our hats to the late Andy Whitfield, who starred in the first season of Starz’ Spartacus before succumbing to cancer in 2011. By all accounts he was as wonderful inside as out—who knows what roles he might’ve conquered next?
Triple S
Clash of the Titans was a great movie. Bloody ridiculous by today’s standards, but its oldness was funny in its own right. This is a sixteen year saying that this movie was good. Which is slightly weird, I suppose…
TMikel
Steve Reeves! Such form, such elegance, and he could even act a bit.
Stefan
I just watched the first episode of Spartacus:Vengeance. It honestly feels like a different show. I’m sure Liam Macyntyre will grow on me but it just isn’t the same without Andy.
gay greece
Spartacus is set in ancient Rome, not ancient Greece…
iDavid
Harry Hamlin a twink? Are you psycho? The guy is a total stud. Twinks are usually under developed often effeminate obvious gay generally skinny guys. Please don’t defame a historical heart throb hot good looking hunky masculine superstar with such a blase reference.
Rey
Uh, the “ancient times” had indoor plumbing. The aqueducts carried water into Roman households and lead pipes were used to transport water and waste. How do you think all those public baths filled their tubs?
declanto
@TMikel: Steve was the biggest swish in Hollywood, they had to dub his nelly voice over.
ousslander
LOved Troy, Brad never looked finer. Cannot wait for Spartacus to start.
Phantom
What about Russel Crowe from Gladiator? I miss Andy from Spartacus, he was the man.
Charlie
Ah all that Antiquated hotness does one good! Sam Worthington was quite lovely in the Clash of the Titans remake.
Charlie
Ah all that Antiquated hotness does one good! Sam Worthington was quite lovely in the Clash of the Titans remake.
And iDavid, calm down buddy. When Twink is menat as a compliment just view it as such.
iDavid
@Charlie
Haha ok. I must agree Sam Worthington is a cum shot w/o touching. Def missed him in this batch. He was soooooo hot in that little thing he wore in Clash of ….. those legs ………!
Russell Crowe is ok but I guess he might rate this crew.
Mike UK
@Charlie: agree with Sam, just a shame the film was crap!
ee
I had THE BEASTMASTER on VHS when I was a kid. Marc Singer was pretty much naked through the whole movie. Hot stuff in the early 80s.
http://youtu.be/LV_U9FyijaY
chpinnlr
#9 is a cropped image of a Full Frontal scene of James Purefoy in Rome. My dvr rewind button almost melted! Giddy Up!