“Thanks to the Supreme Court ruling on gay marriage,” blogger Rick Jensen writes in a new op-ed published by GOPUSA, “the legality of polygamy will go to the Supreme Court and polygamists will win.”
Of course, before that can happen the polygamists first have lose in the lower courts, then petition the U.S. Supreme Court, which has to agree to hear their case. As of right now, there don’t appear to be any polygamists in the process of doing this.
Yet Jensen believes it’s only a matter of time before it happens. And when it does, our great nation will be doomed.
Related: CA Woman Predicts Marriage Equality Will Lead To Polygamy, Atomic War, Hunger And Moon Colonies
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“Historically, polygamy has violently disrupted societal growth,” Jensen writes, “directly leading to crime, riots and eventual banning of the practice.”
He goes on to say that “researchers” (though he doesn’t cite which ones) have found that societies where polygamy is legal “produce more rapes, crimes of theft and a decidedly unhappy population of middle and lower income males who find a lack of compatible female mates due to their wealthy male competitors marrying the most attractive of the species.”
In other words: Female specimens only exist to keep males happy and for $$$, so when males act out, it’s the females who are to blame.
All of this, Jensen believes, is the result of a secret mission launched by the gays and the media to disrupt “the long-term success” of the “marriage system” and to abolish Christianity altogether.
Related: “Masturbation Will Make Me Turn Gay” And 40 More Wacky Lies From The Mormon Church
“Christianity has been successfully redefined in popular culture by western secularists and the media as a religion of hate,” he writes, “so if Christians promote a standard, it’s hateful and must be repealed. Gay marriage and limiting adoption to heterosexuals are the two most outstanding examples.”
Christian men should be especially worried about polygamy becoming the law of the land, Jensen says, because “[i]nstead of just one wife to ‘educate’ you to your personal flaws, you’ll have The Wives Team one at a time and then en masse.”
He adds: “That, plus the inevitable, ‘Does wife Rebecca’s butt look better in her jeans than mine?'”
Jensen seems to forget one key thing: Even if polygamy were to be made legal in the United States, Christian men and women would not be forced to enter plural marriages.
Evidently, that’s one too many thoughts for his brain to compute.
Related: Christian Extremist Records Herself Imploding Over Marriage Equality In Must-See Video
Paul Hilton
I’m so confused how wanting to marry your partner can lead to you wanting to marry multiple people. Can someone please explain.
Steve Davies
Well, polygamy is certainly biblical. In fact it’s all through the bible, as are sex slaves. What a pity that christians seldom read the book they always quote.
TJ Parker
The only folks seeking legalized polygamy are ultra-religious fundamentalist Mormons. And ironically, its the movement for the “religious liberty” to violate laws that violate one’s sincerely held religious beliefs that is most likely going to make legal polygamy a reality.
Greg Wallin
I support polygamy. It’s a shame that the “Christians” have ti connect it with pedophilia just to keep it on the other side of the law.
Finrod
And…? My only objection to polygamy is that it usually seems to involve a cult where one man enslaves a bunch of women. If it’s free and equal, more power to them.
ted72
He should set himself on fire.
o.codone
I just can’t wait to have two or three lawyers divorcing me from one or two of my partners and another lawyer drawing up the visitation rights for my children. I’m all for mixing it up with multiple partners, some males, some females, but a lot of people don’t have an understanding, or simply don’t care about what it takes to unravel what the Good Lord has joined together. Lot’s and lots of legal fees. (and just one more thought, if I enter into a legal agreement with my dog can I bring him from the UK without having to get a puppy passport?).
Daveliam
@Finrod: Exactly. I legitimately have no issues with the concept of legalizing polygamy if it’s between multiple consenting adults. Of course, we know that historically, this isn’t the case usually. But, in theory only? I would be totally fine with polygamy if everyone is an adult who agrees to it. It’s not MY marriage, so why should I care?
Thomas Villarreal
Theocrats can’t read their own books but can apparently use the Internet.
Glücklich
Oh, so a return to the good old days. You’d think they’d be happy about that. Now if they could just bring back sacrificing your kids on a mountaintop altar.
Bob Turner
Bring it on!
Bobby French
I hope so! I am much better with couples than I am with singles!
Stephen Sottile
Polygamy is in the OT, what is his beef?
Thomas Hogueisson
This is nothing new for these “christians” they embrace many sex cults i.e. mormons.
Rochelle Flores
I think polygamy is just fine between consenting adults.
Patrick Arwood
This is perfect! I’m from Utah and could use a brother husband!
aliengod
Why shouldn’t it be legal. Isn’t it possible to love more than one person?
William C. Searcy
I have no problem with polygamy. Some people enjoy the drama.
Atrius
There’s no real argument against it besides a religious one, and religion is irrelevant.
Bromancer7
“Christianity has been successfully redefined in popular culture by western secularists and the media as a religion of hate…”
I just love this line. And how exactly do you think that happened, asshole? Maybe because you zealots go around screaming at everyone who doesn’t follow your religion and fight tooth and nail to deny people their legal rights? Oh, and then claim the end of the world is nigh when they do get their rights.
Maybe if you practiced Jesus’ teaching of “love they neighbor” and stopped trying to harass and oppress people whose belief system is different than yours (y’know, stop being hateful) then people might stop seeing Christianity as the “religion of hate.” I mean, seriously, at this point there is no difference between you and Islamic fundamentalists.
Michael Arwood
And maybe brother husband can have a sister wife. The possibilities are endless. My mind races ahead about the possibilities. Sister wives and brother husbands make my head spin. I could barely keep up with one wife.
Hana Chan
they should be thrilled then, as that is one of the forms of traditional marriage outlined in the bible.
1EqualityUSA
Worry about divorce, lady, as Christ spoke more against divorce and NOTHING about anyone being born gay.
Ladbrook
If (big if) the legal/judicial system takes on multi-partner marriage, the challenges will come from the right and the left. Far-right fundamentalists from Mormon offshoot sects and from certain strains of Islam will want traditional arrangements of one man with x number of wives. In these cases, the petitioner will technically be applying for the right to have several two-person marriage certificates. Typically, the man will be married to 6 women, but the 6 women will not be married to each other.
The other challenge will come from a younger and more libertine group of people from the left who will be looking for something more akin circular marriage. In other words, 3 or more people in a single marriage in which all are married to each other. Person A is married to person B who is married to person C who is married to Person A, etc etc. (A perfect setup for a group of loving bisexuals!)
Look for court challenges in the coming years from people coming at this from both perspectives.
edtaylorky
I suppose I’m fine with consensual non-brainwashed-cultish polygamy. My issue would be economic…does the state pay benefits to ALL of John’s 10 wives in equal portions should he die, or is it divided into tenths? Does a business have to offer to partially pay for the health insurance of all six of Mary’s husbands (or wives or both), or do we divide it up? Also-I’m not buying a new toaster for each wedding…it’s only fair 😉
Patrick Laney
Are these people idiots? You could already marry your cousin and your sister in Utah right?
Jill Sidley
Hilarious. I want to go to a moon colony!
Damien Malachi
Fears? More like hopes. -_-
M J Martinez Crogan
Victor Cornetto
Polygamy is of the Bible, and exists throughout it and throughout the history of man. If sex is for procreation as many evangelical “Christians” believe, then polygamy is a natural extention of that belief since many of Natures species are polygamous to insure survival.
Atrius
@edtaylorky: it should be divided. It’s based on his income which was a specific amount, not multiplied by the number of wives he had, and I would only agree to polygamy if women were equally allowed to marry more than one husband.
Steve Tracewell
edtaylorky
@Atrius: agreed.
Imagine how complex:
John is married to Adam, Bill, and Cindy.
Adam is married to John and Bill, not to Cindy, but also to
Edward.
Cindy is only married to John.
Edward is, however, married to Fred, who used to be married to Adam.
Ha! It won’t be religious differences, but paper work that makes some Clerks leave.
(This meant to be a thought experiment and not a disparagement of polygamy)
1EqualityUSA
Polygamy is withheld from everybody, gay or straight, whereas, gay couples were denied even having one spouse. That where the inequality issue arose.
Lee Alan Floyd
right, because three alimony payments is sooo much better than one 🙂
MarionPaige
What’s in a word here, I guess?
If you search “polyamory”, you will see that this “multiple partnerss movement” is a bit organized. And that, unlike with the gay marriage aholes, the polyamory crowd does NOT want the state in their bedrooms
I say thank God for Gay Marriage because now the real “marriage revolution” can begin. During the gay marriage smoke screen campaign, all alternatives to marriage were basically locked out of the public discussion. The idea / suggestion that maybe THE STATE NOT BE A PARTY TO PEOPLE’s SEXUAL RELATIONSHIPS were locked out of the public discussion. Tell me,
If you take all of the legal arguments and discussion from Justice Kennedy in re Lawrence v Texas and Gay Marriage how can you not see that Kennedy would probably vote FOR the state not being a party to marriage? The real objection the state and others have / had against GAY marriage was that The State was a party to marriage.
Polygamy will come about INDIRECTLY, when The State is removed as a party to people’s sexual relationships. With The State NOT A Party to “Marriage”, the state and the public will not care how many people are Fking each other.
Danelle Anderson Cunningham
Why? It’s the religious freedom they always cry about! …oh wait….it’s only Christian Freedom!
Transiteer
Christians already have polygamy themselves — it’s called the Mormon Church.
Tom Belkowski
Why is it anyone’s business?
Mikki Hurley
Well fear is the only way to tie people to the church. Without it the leaders of the churches would lose all control, power and money. Keep people scared of the world out there and they’ll never question authority or doctrine
Nelson Kaiowá
So what? I don´t see what cerain “christians” have against love and commitment….
Judy Rae Jackson
There are two main issues with polygamy. The first is that many of the groups that support polygamy have a habit of marrying very young girls to very old men. In my opinion, as long as all participants are consenting adults, who cares? The other issue is the federal & state tax codes. The tax codes are set up for TWO people to be married. Filing taxes can already be very complicated, add in additional wives or husbands & it could be an accountant’s worst nightmare.
Sam Raether
*cackles* Good. That along with the uprising of trans rights, maybe they’ll get burnt out from fighting and be quiet.
Mark Angstman
Well good.
Lotta Yadayada
It’es here…..
Harriet Neal
might solve the problem of all those unwanted babies by the “good” evangelicals…aka anti-abortionists.
Douglas Kovacs
aren’t there already people in these types of situations (Sisterwives?) I mean it’s not for me,, but maybe it will cut down the divorce rate and hey if one guy wants to have multiple headaches,, opps I mean wives (insert funny laughter) then go for it… again who is going to get hurt in this case?
Elizabeth Rollins Eadie
OH NOES! More people finding happiness! Whatever shall we do?
Seriously, what is it with people wanting to control other people’s relationships?
David Pickersgill
And polygamy could mean you can all actually afford to buy and pay for a house…… win win
1EqualityUSA
MarionPaigeNOMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOM-skull.
Terrence Houlihan
Why NOT??? They have let JACKASS’S like yourself get married for years!!!!!!!!!! What’s that called??? Donkey Love??? LOL
Caoimhin Mikael Lycke
Just ask a Mormon!
Gabriel Robbie Montoya
Oh sweet Jesus here we go with more right wing propaganda and fear
Caoimhin Mikael Lycke
I want tosee a woman with more than one husband…change it up!!!
Alexandre Lessard-Sigouin
Must be related to gay marriage… lol
John DeGregory
Ask anyone in Utah
Ann Bednarski
polygamy is bible beliefs
Doug Freelon
I say let the 15 or 20 American straight men who want more than one wife have at ’em!!
Chris
And after that, “Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria!”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JmzuRXLzqKk
Kit Cañedo
in the words of Alicia Silverstone “As If!”
Jeffrey Thomas
Surprise, Polygamy was here long before gay equality. Lying is bad enough but when people claiming to be Christians do it is immoral and a huge burn in hell kind of sin. It’s call false witness.
Kenny Jones
Good news! I’m really into a least a couple of hot guys; and, if I’m patient, I may NOT have to chose between them. 😉
Dymension
Um, King Solomon had how many wives and how many concubines? If he’s fearing polygamy is around the Corner, he’s too late. It’s been around for thousands of years and is written about in the bible!!!!!
Volvoguy
who in the hell would 3 of anything, this is the most insane thing I’ve ever heard.
taking care of 1 spouse is a full time job.
don’t desire or want anymore than that.