– Unlike Lindsay Lohan, Mean Girls memes will never get tired. Presenting, Les Mean Girls.
– Nicholas Hoult decided not to go all “method” by losing his penis the way his zombie character does in Warm Bodies.
– Penélope Cruz and Javier Bardem are expecting their second gorgeous, future Oscar-winning child.
– Basketball legend and amateur TV critic Kareem Abdul-Jabbar thinks Girls should’ve just used a black dildo instead of “forcing” an interracial relationship with lead character Hannah.
– Sesame Street parodied Downton Abbey, which sadly does not feature Elmo as an evil butler who tries to seduce and unsuccessfully blackmail Bert and Ernie:
– Lady Gaga left the Lady at home when she appeared in court and went off — under oath at that — on her former assistant and friend Jennifer O’Neill, calling her a “witch,” “a disgusting human being,” and a “fucking hood rat who is suing me for money that she didn’t earn.”
– Someone get Sigourney Weaver a stylist ’cause homegirl wore her dress backwards to the SAG Awards.
– Meanwhile, Jennifer Lawrence is handling her SAG fashion faux-pas quite well.
– Formerly irrelevant, currently barely existing celebreality couple Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag blew all their money in anticipation of the Mayan Apocalypse.
– Ex-American Idol judge Steven Tyler decided to grace the auditions with his presence and for once Nicki and Mariah weren’t the biggest drag queens in the room: