New York Post's recent price hike really pissed us off, but it's "Just Asking" head scratchers like these that make it worth that extra quarter:

• Which actor - married with child - and known to have been gay during his years on stage - showed up at the premiere of his film at the Tribeca Film Festival with a boy described by onlookers as a lookalike?

• Which grizzled action hero has been consuming so much alcohol and cocaine it's affecting his work? He can't remember his lines, and then loses his temper.

• Which buffed-out Hollywood star - who loves showing off his bulging muscles - wishes he were a little more bulging in another department? According to people who've seen him naked, he's overcompensating with muscles he can make bigger.

Flex that brain muscle of yours and squeeze out some guesses...

If there's one person we love, it's that adorable scamp Rupert Everett. Sure, he may have a reputation for being a bit of a diva, but that doesn't mean he hasn't got some valid points to make, so we're thrilled to itty-bits that Out Magazine's taken some time to sit down with the gay actor to chat about his new memoir, Red Carpets and Other Banana Skins.

Sitting down with fellow Brit and Out EIC, Aaron Hicklin, Everett chats about his new book, growing up gay and the state of the gay celebrity nation. While he laments the dearth of out gay celebrities - a shortage that's particularly irksome when straight actors land the choice gay roles - Everett's not looking to be the go-to gay in the celebrity village.

CONTINUED »

You see before you the inaugural installment for The Youth Issue. Pretty exciting, no?

When planning out the issue, we had a bit of struggle deciding how to start it off. Then we realized there's really no better choice than legendary homo-journo, Michael Musto (pictured, circa 1964). He's been snarking it up since before we even knew the meaning, targeting closeted celebrities long before Perez Hilton and generally being fabulous for more years than we can count (but, to be fair, we can't count above seven).

In celebration of the publication of his new retrospective collection, La Dolce Musto, editor Andrew Belonsky and Musto got all cozy like at New York City's B Bar for a little post-work heart-to-heart. If ever there were a conversation to read, this is it - seriously, it's got more delicious bits than an Equinox gym.

Such as? Well, such as Musto's remembrance of ACT UP, a particularly memorable Michael Alig party and his explanation of why Joan Crawford's a total liar.

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It seems fame's gone to Clay Aiken's ginger head. After winning a singing contest, 15-year old Joshua Willard got the change to sing with North Carolina's Greensboro Symphony during Aiken's holiday concert. Poor Willard's dreams were shattered, however, when the singer deemed his chosen song (Stevie Wonder's Superstitious) inappropriate for the festive occasion. As if that's not enough to make you sharpen your pitchforks, Aiken didn't win any hearts with his once-signature sweetness. Gossip-mongering TMZ reports:

Willard says Aiken was rude to audience members and told several people to sit down and cover their mouth. Clay even showed a raunchier side by pretending he had flatulence every time feedback came through the speakers.

Oh, Aiken, everyone knows American Idol losers don't fart. But, wait, it gets worse:

An hour after the show, Willard got to meet Clay, but says that Miss Thing was "snotty" and acted like he was too good for his little fans. The former Claymates were even told not to take individual pictures with Aiken, only group shots. Willard is devastated and says that due to Aiken's behavior, he now "could care less of Clay."

Sensible kid, huh?

(PS: This picture of Clay Aiken never fails to make us giggle. And then, of course, cringe. It almost gives us a tinge of sympathy for the kid...almost.)

Phew! We were getting worried that this whole Rosie O'Donnell/Donald Trump war of words was coming to an end. Luckily the Big O (no, not Oprah) shed fresh blood with one of her nonsensical blog poems (blogem?) in which she writes:

so what happens
when u say the emperor has no clothes
the comb over goes ballistic
via phone to mr king

choices
every minute
every day
everyone

i imagine it is interesting
as celeb feuds tend 2 b
so here r my thoughts

Blah, blah and even more blah.

Not to be upstaged, Mr. T responded with these lovely words:

Rosie got mentally beaten up by me because she's a mental midget, a low-life... It's too bad a degenerate is able to get away with things like that...

Goodness gracious! This entire battle threatens to dismantle the entire English language. We have a lesbian who only speak in haiku or poetry or some shit and a billionaire womanizer whose attacks sound like a verbal self-portrait. This is worse than the Tower of Babel.

It's long been rumored that Penelope Cruz and Salma Hayek eat one another's Latina labias. While some celebrities would fight back, defending their heterosexual tendencies by marrying a braindead starlet, Cruz loves feeding the sapphic speculation.

Daily India reports:

Instead of denying the gossips Cruz is fanning them, and claims she knows why those lesbian rumours refuse to die. She insists that it's all just a publicity stunt, which she herself has fomented by acting extra cozy with her Mexican friend.

Apparently Cruz is so starved for attention that she intentionally grabbed Hayek's bum to get more press. "I grabbed Salma's ass just to keep things moving, because everyone was a little slow."

We call bullshit. Cruz didn't grab Hayek's ass for extra publicity. She was trying to do a little lesbianic reach around. Ain't nothing like fingering some caliente coochie to get a girl going.

There's no glamour in the tabloids. We have the same dozen stars in the same dozen positions, particularly one's that don't look very good in pictures. Just today The New York Post, everyone's favorite conservative tab-news rag, featured a picture of Britney Spears, Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan with a caption "Bimbo Summit". None of the women look particularly glamorous, nor do they invoke envy, sympathy or wonder.

If photographer Ron Galella had his way, we'd never have to look at another grotesque display of celebrity debauchery again. Sure, his pictures of the disco era captured enough debauchery to kill the Pope, but there's more to his work than deliciously excessive partying.

CONTINUED »

• Those ever so blunt Dutch ask Missy Elliott if she's either gay or straight. Even that bitch Barbara Walters couldn't get to this level of awkwardness. [MTV via Arjan]

• Oh and Keanu Reeves? Still not gay either. [Pink News]

• Looks like this Ashley Cole controversy has made Brits just as lawsuit crazy as Americans. [Pink News]

• Christine Quinn is Irish, New York's City Council Speaker, and a dyke. And she won't be marching in this week's St. Patrick's Day parade. [NY Post]

• Forget the 100K, what Chloe Dao really wants is a new Saturn. [NY Post]

• We've never listened to Fall Out Boy, but there's no reason we can't check out one the band member's own cock shots. BTW, love the Morrissey album. Nice gay touch. [Jossip]

• If you missed last night's Project Runway finale (a dutiful gay would have been glued to his/her TV set at 10 last night), The Malcontent has an extensive wrap-up. [The Malcontent]

• Andy gives us yet another opportunity to ogle a half-naked Jake Gyllenhaal. [Towleroad]

• Our favorite queer rocker, Michael van London (he’s beautiful, nice, and talented, what more could you ask for?), will be giving those queers in West Hollywood a reason to travel North of Santa Monica Boulevard. He’s playing the Sunset Strip next week. [Michael Van London Official Site]

• The Church that is the final resting place for John Adams and his son, John Quincy, will get to hang a pro same-sex marriage banner outside of its entrance after all. [Bay Windows]

At least not in prison. The former Culture Club lead singer and now tabloid train wreck, Boy George, cut a plea deal with Manhattan prosecutors over his recent cocaine bust charges. He got off with a $1,000 fine, a week of community service and some rehab.

As part of the plea agreement, the Manhattan District Attorney dropped the more serious drug-possession charges, which could have landed the former Culture Club crooner up to 15 years in prison if convicted. Judge Anthony Ferrara said the entertainer, whose real name is Gorge O'Dowd, to undergo his rehab at a clinic in his native England.

"I am relieved and happy that this case has been disposed of, and would like to thank the judge, the district attorney and my attorney, Lou Freeman, for the fair and speedy way it was dealt with," the singer said in a statement issued through his manager. "I love New York, and am looking forward to coming back and working in the States later this year."

Read: New York has the best cocaine and there’s no way I’m not coming back. Also, if any readers happen to spot Boy George, hopefully wearing an orange jumpsuit doing community service by cleaning up crack vials in Central Park, you know where to send the pics.

Boy George Tumbles for Plea Deal [Yahoo! Entertainment]

Remember Madonna’s little kiss with Britney at the MTV Awards a few years back? Of course you do. If you’re like us, you’ve Tivoed it and watch it every Christmas morning. Still, seems on little gal was a bit confused by it. And we don’t mean Rosie O’Donnell.

Madonna has admitted her famous kiss with Britney Spears caused her daughter Lourdes to get “obsessed” with gay issues. The singer said the nine-year-old asked: “Mom, you know that they say you are gay?”

Madge, 47, explained her snog with Britney, 27, at an MTV show was not sexual. She told Lourdes: “I am the mommy pop star and she is the baby pop star. I am kissing her to pass my energy on to her.”

We’re not even really why Madonna needed to explain ‘gayness’ to adorable little Lourdes, seeing as though we always assumed her home was brimming with queens fluttering about. Still, you have to admire the Patron Saint of Queerty for explaining things so eloquently to her daughter. That bitch does everything right.

Madge girl’s Gay Worries [The Sun UK]

Michelle Williams blew us away with her Oscar-nominated performance in Brokeback Mountain. Like everyone else, we had a lump in our throats when Jack & Ennis passionately kiss during their first reunion. Alma's immediate reaction to the lip lock was far more moving. But not everyone felt that way about her performance. Take, for example, Michelle's former Christian headmaster, Jim Hopson:

"We don't want to have anything to do with her in relation to that movie,” said Hopson, who turned down a request from a Union-Tribune reporter to visit the school and chat with students about the movies and one of their own being up for an Academy Award.

“Michelle doesn't represent the values of this institution. We would not approve of her movies and TV shows (including the teen drama “Dawson's Creek”). We'd not like to be tied to 'Brokeback Mountain.'
Yes because the first thing moviegoers will think of while leaving the theater after a screening of the film is a small Christian school in San Diego County.

We now understand why Michelle moved Heath and their baby across the country to Brooklyn; To get away from the loyal, tolerant, and Jesus-like love of Dopson.

S.D. school distances self from 'Brokeback' actress [San Diego Union-Tribune]