We know that we’re not perfect. As much as we love all things gay, there are some things that some of our fellow homos do that make us cringe: frosted hair, mesh shirts, rainbow ringed necklaces, Miatas. We know we usually have more taste and style than the straights, but sometimes good taste turns to tackiness, kitsch, garishness. Like Elton John.

And we’re cool with tacky things, but only when they’re done in that smart, ironic way. Think Todd Oldham. Sometimes The Gays go a bit overboard. Leave it to a bunch of fags to get so inspired by Brokeback Mountain to create art. Really bad art, but art nonetheless.

Defamer recently found that eBay has become the hot spot for your original artwork inspired by Brokeback Mountain. It will look great next to your Judy Garland photograph or your Tom of Finland poster, honey. Psyche.

They’re so bad, they’re almost good. At least we found something to get Andy Towle for his birthday this year.

Brokeback Mania Inspires Art [Defamer]
Brokeback Gay Paintings [eBay]

A brave tipster sat through an entire episode of estrogen gab-fest The View and came back with this, shall we say, juicy tidbit and fired it off to Defamer.

10:43. I’m watching ‘The View’ for unknown reasons, and the ladies have a private investigator on. He’s selling an eighty dollar kit that allows you to find out if your spouse is cheating on you without hiring his services. He brings in blue gym shorts that were sent to him from a suspecting wife, and he’s going to ultraviolet test them on-air to determine if there are bodily fluids. The investigator finds a glowy spot and says, “Now you see that? That’s something that really shouldn’t be there.” Meredith says wait, hey, he can’t tell if it’s a woman’s bodily fluids or a man’s, though, and then Star jumps in. Direct quote: “Well there’s a huge difference between vaginal and seminal fluid. Seminal fluid I can handle if you’re my husband. Vaginal fluid…I got issues.”

Star, Star, Star. Some times you just need to be sat down and have your girlfriends tell it like it is. When it comes to your exfoliated and perfectly coifed man, Al, trust us, it ain’t the vaginal fluids you should have issues with. Unless of course you all have a “thing” all worked out and then in that case it’s none of our business. Just as long as Barbra Walters is not involved, we can stomach it.

STAR JONES’ STAIN DOUBLE STANDARD [Defamer]

Bruce Vilanch recently took time from his busy schedule to chat with Bradford Shellhammer about the blogs he reads, the Bush administration, and this year’s Oscars. He also dishes on a few of our favorite divas.

Ok. Hi Bruce. We at Queerty love you. And we are sad we missed your show Almost Famous 2005 in San Francisco. What did we miss?

Full-frontal nudity. The first three rows had to move back.

You have so many projects lined up. Tell us about Queer Duck?

I play myself. It's a stretch. But it's never gotten in Jerry Seinfeld's way. This is a feature-length version of the cartoons that used to follow Queer as Folk on Showtime. They once had me pop in as a guest joke, and we all thought that this time I should do the voice instead of Mercedes McCambridge.

And Celebrity Fit Club! This is one of our guilty pleasures. We only wish you were on the same season at Jackee. How did this come about?

I think I can lay the blame at the feet of ant. Which is better than laying ants at the feet of, oh never mind. He recommended me and when they called they said we're hoping you can add some humor to the proceedings. Losing weight is such martyrdom that people give themselves over to their own drama. Maybe it's because they're deprived of the one thing that they could count on -- food. It's a pity party three times a day. So I'm trying to do it and have a few chuckles along the way.

After the jump Bruce talks about Bette, Whoopi, and Miss. Ross.

[Read On ...]

• Mariah Carey will make an appearance at the Virgin Megastore in LA tonight. We encourage all you Angelenos to be there before the imminent nervous breakdown causes her to once again disappear from the scene. Bitch is due.

•We've heard the Eddie Murphy/Johnny Gill rumors but we're not sold just yet. We always thought Eddie was into trannies. Unless Johnny Gill becomes Johnny Girl at night.

• Q Network joins Logo and Here! as the trio of gay cable channels in NYC making it the hottest threesome this side of Chelsea.

• A ship goes down in Titanic. In Brokeback Mountain, Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal go down on each other. But that isn't the only thing these two movies have in common. (Via Defamer)

• Gender-free bathrooms seemed to work just fine on Ally McBeal.

• Rent doesn't come out until next weekend but being a card carrying queer you're required to whet your appetite with this preview.